Warbands of the Jinchuriki
by KingsOfSarutobi
Summary: As the shinobi world heats up in a world with a new generation, the Bijuu receive warning of a threat - but how can they best prepare their Jinchuriki for a heated and deadly series of events? Unite. The only issue? Pride. Before the Jinchuriki and Bijuu can fight against the threat to the world, two will fight each other for control of the helm. [Naruto x Fuu] & others, AU.
1. Chapter 1: Enter Fuu!

**It's been a long time since I've been graced with the ability and inspiration to write in large quantities. Luckily, with finals coming and passing as they will, more chapters will be out before you know it.**

 **I have little to say other than that, if any questions pop up in reviews or Private Messages, I will address them in the next chapter for public viewing of general questions. More specific, personal, or plot-spoiling questions will be answered as I see fit.**

 **~KoS**

There are a few words which can accurately describe the scene the siblings came to see. Shocking was one word that would fit, and would sum up their expressions. Silencing, too, was suitable, after all, the siblings were utterly quiet.

After all, it wasn't every day that all nine Bijuu assembled, and the days were even fewer when none of them knew how it had happened.

" **Spill it, which one of you weaklings did this?"** Grunted the nine-tailed fox, lazily looking around at his tailed siblings with one eye, as if gauging which one of them had summoned them all.

" **Kurama, have you gone off the deep end? Is this chakra unfamiliar to you, brother?"** Asked the Yonbi no Saru, a majestic and proud red ape by the name of Son Goku. The fox's blood-red eye looked at the monkey and then scoffed.

" **I recognize the chakra, you imbecile. Are you so thick that you're not surprised that we're all together in HIS chakra?"** Recognizing a fight on the brew, another member of their motley crew spoke up.

" **Kurama, you're as much in the dark as the rest of us. Kokuo, you always have had a sharp memory, do you know anything about this place?"** The Eight-tailed Gyuuki, an octopus with an ox's head, spoke, turning from the fox to one of the stranger Bijuu, a five-tailed horse with a dolphin's head.

"… **I can think of one situation."** Seeing everyone's eyes on him, Kokuo sighed and continued. " **Jiji did a lot of things before he passed on to ensure the world would be safe. He split up the Juubi's chakra into us, sealed away Kaguya and the husk of the beast in the moon, and even stationed his brother there to guard it, created us from the split chakra into nine equal parts-"** A paw smashed into the ground, impatient with Kokuo's rambling.

" **Get on with it, stop your RAMBLING!"** The hyperactive and impatient One Tail, Shukaku of the Sand, thrashed around.

"… **Jiji set up a number of safeguards, and one of them was a star that was meant to trigger itself using a precognition jutsu."** The instant precognition was mentioned, all eyes snapped to Kokuo, and silence reigned again. Not even Kurama looked like he wanted to interrupt Kokuo now.

" **Jiji placed a little bit of our chakra in the star too, and he said something about us meeting if the world was in peril…"** At this point Kurama snorted.

" **So you're telling me that we're in some star right now?"** Kokuo pointed one hoof at the orb protruding from the ceiling, showing very clearly the shinobi regions, with nine markers on it around the realms, marked 1-9.

" **Unless that's something else, and Jiji set up whatever this is, I can't see what else would cause a spontaneous meeting with all of us."** Gyuuki sighed, and Son Goku's head lowered slightly, confident demeanor vanished.

" **So, if we can conclude this is the star, may I move on?"** Upon seeing no opposition, Kokuo continued. " **If Jiji really needs to summon us at this point, then something very bad is truly happening. Why else would his star bring all of us?** " Isobu the three-tailed turtle spoke up, confident but cautious words speaking his mind.

" **If he truly needs to summon us, then let us assume that whatever the issue is, it requires all of our might to subdue."** Isobu said grimly, eyeing his brethren.

" **Well in that case, all we need to do is-"** The Yonbi spoke up, but Isobu cut him off.

" **Let me finish my speech, Son. My point is, we'll need to work together, something we're notoriously unable to do most of the time."** At this, the Bijuu wisely shut up and knew what was coming.

" **We need a system to effectively work together. We need something that will stop us from falling apart the instant someone's ego gets even larger than it is already!"** Isobu's roar at the end was accompanied by sharp looks to Son Goku, Shukaku, and Kurama, the three proudest of their company.

" **Well, to keep our egos in check, we'll need one of us to be a leader, or a commander of sorts…"** The two-tailed cat Matatabi made this suggestion, her fur of blue fire crackling softly as her eyes remained closed.

" **If we need a leader, we should have a strong one, correct?"** Kurama's voice boomed out, both eyes open now, switching attention from one Bijuu to the next. When affirmative sounds were heard, Kurama spoke up again. " **If we need a leader, why not have the strongest? I have the most tails out of all of you, and my Jinchuriki is pregnant, I'll be free soon enough."** At this, several tailed beasts soured.

" **Shukaku of the Sand takes no orders from you, FOX!"** The Tanuki of the Sand roared with displeasure, thrashing around.

" **The instant I give in to your pride is the day I am no longer the Sage Monkey, Son Goku!"** The Yonbi roared with displeasure, fists at the ready.

" **Kurama, is not your Jinchuriki an Uzumaki?"** At this, the Bijuu paid close attention to Gyuuki, and then Kurama.

" **Gyuuki, weren't the Uzumaki the redheads on that island?"** Gyuuki nodded at Son Goku, who, or rather, his jinchuriki was a crucial element of the destruction of the Uzumaki clan.

" **My Jinchuriki was asked to come from Uzushio by my first Jinchuriki. My host's chakra is special, and her abilities to produce chakra chains are second to none. She is an Uzumaki if ever there was one."** Unsurprisingly, Kurama's eyes were full of hate despite his praise of his Jinchuriki's abilities.

" **The Uzumaki have special chakra – I seriously doubt you'll be able to break out of her seal without someone else interfering."** Gyuuki paused. **"Plus, I know that Konoha has several powerful Fuinjutsu masters. I'll be damn surprised if you break out."** Kurama snorted, and closed his eyes again.

" **Still, as Isobu said, we all need to work together. Who would be better than the one with the most tails?"** Gyuuki sighed, and another voice joined the fray.

" **Kurama, if you want someone with a lot of tails to command, I can do it."** All eyes turned towards the seven tails – Chomei. Unlike the other Bijuu, Chomei's expression was always difficult to read, because the Kabutomushi had armor over the face very similar to bars, and his glowing yellow eyes had no pupils, making his line of sight impossible to discern.

" **Sounds good to me."** Gyuuki was the first to respond.

" **Shukaku of the Sand will never take orders from that FOX. Chomei! Chomei! Cho-"** One of Matatabi's tails whacked Shukaku over the head, silencing the Tanuki. The Kyuubi's eyes popped open as he glared at Gyuuki.

" **I'll never take orders from that bug, and as Isobu said; we need everyone to agree, don't we?"** Across the room, sighs of annoyance were heard from Isobu, Son Goku, Kokuo, and Chomei.

" **Well Kurama, since you won't be assuming command, and because I'm in no position to assume it, Chomei is the better choice, wouldn't you agree?"** Kurama refocused his attention on Gyuuki.

" **I wouldn't agree. That bug got sealed by a** _ **minor**_ **village – I had to fight Hashirama Senju and Madara Uchiha before I was sealed by the Uzumaki."** The Bijuu recoiled at the mention of the Uchiha's name, so evil was he in the beasts' eyes.

" **Even so, I'm the one in the best circumstance to lead in this tails theory you have."** Kurama and Chomei's argument got quieter, but very rapid, such that none of the other Bijuu could follow.

" **Well, at least only two of them are fighting, right? Right?"** The ever-excited and energetic Saiken, the Rokubi no Namekuji, said, turning rapidly between his neighbors, Gyuuki and Kokuo. As Gyuuki silenced Saiken, Chomei and Kurama looked at each other, each trying to discern the intent behind the other.

" **Chomei, are you trying to steal my spot as the most powerful?"** Chomei's eyes narrowed.

" **You're only the most powerful in your own eyes, and the last time we all had a fight you feigned sleep until it was only down to two, and then you stole the victory!"** Kurama snorted, and something sounding like " **A victory is still a victory"** was heard as he closed his eyes. After a few seconds, Kurama's eyes opened again, and a menacing grin split his face.

" **What if we settled old scores now, bug? You versus me, and we'll see who exactly is the better of us."** Immediately Kokuo responded.

" **We are not having a fight here, Kurama! For all I know, this meeting space could collapse, and all of Jiji's work gone to waste!"** At the mention of their 'Jiji', Kurama settled down bitterly.

" **For the record, I accept your challenge, Kurama, just not in this space. My jinchuriki is old and ailing, when I switch to a new host I'll get settled and contact you, assuming you're still in the Uzumaki."** Kurama gave a sly grin and decided to spice up the conversation a little.

" **So, what would happen if we opened the challenge up a little?"** One of Chomei's eyes narrowed, the other remained wide, as his head tilted.

" **What if we tested our command abilities, and assembled groups to fight alongside us?"** Of course, Kurama was looking for nothing more than humans to kill, but if he could get a couple of the stronger humans like that Namikaze brat or the imitation sage…

" **I don't see why not… Wait, are we using that brat Ashura's challenge?"** Kurama stared back blank, trying to remember Ashura's challenge. Turning to Kokuo, Kurama awaited an explanation.

" **Remember, Kurama, how Ashura joked that us Bijuu just wanted humans to serve us because it was, oh, what was the word…"** Light returned to Kurama's eyes as he threw back his head and roared with laughter.

" **Me, miss up the chance to humiliate the bug like that? The bet's on!"** With that, Kurama laughed some more. Meanwhile, Isobu and Kokuo had a quiet conversation until the others turned to them. Saiken poked Gyuuki with a tail, questioning expression in place.

" **What are they talking about, Gyuuki?"** Gyuuki quietly responded.

" **If Kurama wins, Chomei's Jinchuriki has to serve his, if Chomei wins, Kurama's Jinchuriki serves Chomei's Jinchuriki."** Saiken tilted his head, still not understanding the implications.

" **If Chomei loses, he has to accept Kurama is his overlord until their Jinchuriki die."** Saiken gave a sound of understanding and sat down again. Gyuuki turned to Isobu and Kokuo, curious about their hushed talk.

" **What is it, Isobu, Kokuo?"** The two turned to Gyuuki, and spoke.

" **We're just thinking about what on earth could cause the star to activate when other scourges to the world haven't caused it."** Gyuuki blinked and Isobu spoke up.

" **The threat could be an army…"** Gyuuki shook his head.

" **Armies are not threats, we can win easily by a few well-placed Bijuudama and other large-scale attacks."** Kokuo spoke up.

" **Perhaps, since this threat is something even our creator feared, it could be the Rinnegan like Jiji?"** At this, Kurama gave his thoughts.

" **Please, no puny human in this world could even awaken the Rinnegan, never mind even trying to use it like Jiji did…"** Matatabi spoke up.

" **Perhaps this threat can remove us from the face of the earth, or place us all under seals…"** At this, Gyuuki spoke up again, a fear present in his face.

" **What if someone has discovered the husk?"** At this, everyone froze. That was a very dangerous threat, especially if the Rinnegan awakening was a possibility.

" **And what would they do with the husk, eh?"** Son Goku asked, a skeptical expression already in place.

" **Someone with a good seal in mind could attempt to seal the Bijuu in the Gedo Mazou, and even if they only got bits and pieces of us all, eventually that chakra would manifest into the Juubi and undo Jiji's work."** With this, the Bijuu sighed, and eventually the star's light started to dim.

" **Our time is almost up. If there is anything else to say, say it now."**

" **Chomei, don't forget that promise of a real fight. My Jinchuriki's name is Kushina Uzumaki, contact her when it is time to fight."** The bug nodded, and the fateful meeting on the star finished. Kurama and Chomei truly had no clue how large the effects of their little actions would be by any standards.

 _ **Six Years Later**_

Chomei stared through his seal at the new Jinchuriki, a tiny girl with green hair. Currently she was sleeping, still in shock from having a Bijuu forcefully inserted into her. Chomei's eyes closed in memorial of his now deceased former Jinchuriki, an old man who had once been a traveler before becoming a Jinchuriki and settling down in Takigakure, the Village Hidden in the Waterfall.

The old man didn't really have a friendship with the beetle, but more symbiotic. The old man was kind to him, and didn't ask for anything from Chomei, but in return didn't protest being sealed through violence.

The old man would often talk to Chomei though, about the most trivial things; his day (even though Chomei saw all of his days, not that he knew), what strange deals he had gotten from the market today, tree climbing, bugs, and once even talked about Chomei's favorite food, at which point the Jinchuriki had been shocked to learn that he didn't eat.

Chomei had a small smile though, as he recalled the strange journeys and memories with his old host. They had even exchanged true names briefly; not the fake names given to the outside world. Each one remembered the other's name. The Bijuu; Chomei. The Jinchuriki; Hizen Zhang.

Again, not really a friendship, but they were cordial to each other and had some form of mutual respect. For the Jinchuriki his respect was in the Bijuu for listening and putting up with him, for Chomei it was having someone to talk to who didn't really judge him like the majority of humans did.

Opening his eyes and removing his mind from memory lane, Chomei stared down at his new Jinchuriki. So tiny, so small, so… innocent. Narrowing his eyes, Chomei knew that now was the time to get prepared for war. To do that, the best course of action would be befriending his Jinchuriki and then cutting a deal of some kind.

Chomei didn't know what he could offer his Jinchuriki, the fact of the matter was that his presence in her system automatically meant she would be in a war between demons, with the most proud demon as her adversary. Adding that on top of the already harsh treatment she would receive from the village… Her life would be hell at the rate it was going, and there was still that threat Jiji had predicted on the horizon...

 _ **The Next Day**_

Fuu opened her eyes groggily, wiping away sleep. Yesterday had just been painful, and what had they even done to her? Didn't it involve a demon or something? Oh well, she had more important things to worry about, like getting to the Takigakure academy on time!

Fuu's home was different from others in the village. Ever since yesterday, she had been moved from the orphanage to a home in the forest on the north side of Takigakure. The home itself was a cross between a treehouse and a log cabin, but the village leader and several of his ninja had helped set it up. Her home was set at the top of a tree, with a ladder coming up to a balcony with a small wooden table outside. Inside, her bedroom was on the right side, her kitchen on the left, and a few hidden exits to get to the top of the tree.

"Shido-sama, Shibuki-sama!" Grinning wildly, Fuu moved around her small home and sat at the table in her kitchen, gesturing for the village leader and his son to sit down near her.

"Fuu, have you adjusted okay?" Fuu nodded, not really understanding what he was asking about. She had lived in her home for less than a day, wasn't it a bit early to ask if she was adjusted?

"No funny voices in your head?" Fuu tilted her head. She may live alone, but she wasn't insane! She shook her head violently, and Shibuki looked in confusion between his father and Fuu. "That's good, Fuu. Now before you go to the academy, I have to make a village announcement, and I need you to come up on the stage with Shibuki and me, that sound ok?" Fuu nodded and giggled happily; she had never gotten to go on a stage with the village leader before, how cool was that?

"Fuu-chan! Fuu-chan! You told me you would learn about the clans of Takigakure right?" Shibuki, only three or four years older than her, spoke excitedly. Fuu nodded, closed her eyes, and counted them off.

"Hizen, Shokubai, Murasaki, umm…" Fuu looked up at Shibuki, who shrugged.

"Beikomu, you're forgetting Beikomu, Fuu." Shido spoke up this time, observing the two interact. Hopefully, he would be able to make Shibuki into an older brother figure for Fuu, she certainly needed a family of some kind…

"Do you know about the differences between those three clans, Fuu?" Fuu nodded eagerly.

"The Shokubai have, um... They are good with medicine and poison, right?" Shido nodded, waiting for her to continue.

"The Hizen are one of the founding clans, they're good with Katon and Kenjutsu!" Shibuki grinned at Fuu's knowledge as he and his father nodded, encouraging her to go on.

"And the Murasaki are the guys who practice using spears, right?" Shido nodded, and Shibuki continued where she left off.

"They use more, actually… Spears, Javalins, Throwing darts, pikes… It's their forte. As for the Beikomu, they're worshippers of the Great Spider, and the only one of the four clans to have a widely used Summoning Contract." Fuu pouted at Shibuki's knowledge of the Beikomu, something she had forgotten.

"Fuu, Shibuki, it is time to leave for the village announcement." The two children straightened and flanked their village leader, as he placed one hand on each. The group disappeared in a Shunshin and appeared on the balcony outside the village council chambers.

The entire village was present below, everyone from the active shinobi to the elders to all of the civilians, talking and occasionally looking up at Shido, Shibuki, and Fuu. Immediately as Shido teleported in, another teleported in, a shinobi with a mane of dark hair starting to gray, a pointed beard, and a bandana covering part of his head with the Taki symbol painted onto it.

"Shido-sama." The figure bowed, as Shido nodded and Shibuki smiled widely and ran over to the fellow, hugging him.

"Suien-sensei!" Suien laughed and crouched down, patting Shibuki on the head.

"How are you doing, squirt? Doing well on that chakra exercise?" Shibuki nodded, and Fuu turned away from their conversation, noting that Shido was moving forward, standing on the edge of the balcony, as Suien and Shibuki stood straight, Shibuki on his right, Suien standing far back to the right. Fuu moved to Shibuki's left, hands behind her back.

"People of Takigakure!" Shido's voice, enhanced with chakra, boomed throughout the thousands gathered. "I wish to give great news to this village!" At this, people chattered excitedly. Fuu even thought she saw a few hands pointing to her, wondering who the stranger was on their leader's left.

"As many of you know, our Jinchuriki, the hidden weapon of Takigakure no Sato, has been ailing." People became deathly silent.

"And three days ago, the decision was made to transfer the Nanabi no Kabutomushi into a new host! Yesterday, I personally supervised the extraction of the Nanabi from Takataki Zhang to the young one to my left," Shido picked Fuu up and placed her such that she rested on his shoulders and gripped onto his head, "Fuu!" With this proclamation, all eyes turned towards the mint-haired child on top of the village leader's shoulders.

"Takigakure will have a new Jinchuriki for years to come, one who can use Takataki's knowledge of the beast down the road, one who can use the beast for the glory of our nation!" The people roared with approval, some holding up their arms, others swords in celebration. A chant of "Taki! Taki! Taki!" was heard, as people roared the approval of a new weapon ready to be sharpened to replace their ailing and rusted one.

An hour later, after Shido the cheers had finished and it was time for Fuu to go to the academy.

Walking into her classroom, Fuu saw some of the other students pointing at her and glaring, others whispering while looking towards her. In that moment, Fuu felt truly alone. Even in the orphanage she was a loner by nature, but she had never actively felt fear and disgust from other people.

Sitting down, Fuu unpacked her books and sighed, trying to ignore the stares on the back of her head, but couldn't. It felt like someone was pricking tiny needles into the back of her neck, prickly and awkward to move around in.

"Attention class! Welcome to the academy!" A big man with a slight wisp of a mustache spoke up, Takigakure chunin vest displayed proudly over nondescript dark clothing.

"My name is Namekuji-sensei, and you will address me as such! Throughout your time in the academy, you will be learning subjects ranging from writing and math to various shinobi subjects for seven years. You will be expected here at 8:00 Monday through Friday unless you get days off for whatever reason. You will have homework, and are expected to…" Namekuji-sensei droned on, and on, and on. Fuu hung her head.

Prickly eyes, a drone of a sensei, and a visit from the village leader and his son. How exhausting would this day end up being?!

For the next three hours, Fuu and her classmates spent all of their time introducing each other, writing their names and other various words, and doing basic math. The teaching, of course, was done in perfect monotone.

"And once you hang up your writings, go outside and have some lunch, it's a beautiful day outside!" Fuu sighed in relief. She didn't know how much longer she would last.

A few seconds later, Fuu remembered that she forgot to pack herself lunch! Seeing all of the other kids open backpacks around her, Fuu brought hers outside and hastily pretended to look around, repeating the words "It's here somewhere, I know it is!", as if by pretending she hadn't forgot it, she could get all of the attention off of her and onto the lunches in front of them.

Feeling a little bit of shuffling behind her, Fuu turned around, curiously regarding the classmate holding an opened bento out to her. The kid had tanned skin, dark eyes and shaggy dark hair in a ponytail, with a cloth covering his forehead in a similar way a forehead protector would. He wore a loose-fitting shirt that didn't cover his arms, but extended well below his waistline, and, Fuu noted as her eyes widened, six arms.

"I saw you looking around and figured you didn't have one. Want to share?" Fuu met the eyes of her classmate. Damnit, what was his name again? Kimpachi, Kimimaro, Kitsuchi, uh…

"Uhm… Uh… Uhm…" The classmate kept staring right at Fuu as she struggled with his name. Eyes widening, Kidomaru smiled a bit.

"Kidomaru."Fuu slapped her head, carefully remembering that Kidomaru was the one with six arms. How easily could she forget that?

"I'm Fuu, and, sure! Why not?" The two sat on a log, and started to unpack Kidomaru's lunch. Kido noted that Fuu looked down and remarked on it.

"Why are you so down?" Fuu shook her head, yawning.

"Today's just been really weird." Kido nodded.

"Were you the one up by Shido-sama?" Fuu nodded.

"Yeah, when he and his son showed up I got so sidetracked I forgot to pack lunch…" Kidomaru shrugged, two arms acting as a headrest for him, two more playing janken, and the other two grabbing food. Eyeing the two hands playing janken, he said his thoughts.

"It's not that bad. Think of this like another opportunity to level up and remember next time." Fuu gave him a strange look, halfway between confusion and awkwardness.

"Level… Up?" Kidomaru shrugged again, watching one of his hands pull up grass and throw it into the air.

"Like a game, you know? Think about this like a game, with more chances to get stronger." Fuu shrugged. She didn't really get the game piece, but getting stronger was on her agenda for sure. Why else would she be in the academy?

"Fair enough. Are you part of that clan with the spiders?" Kidomaru nodded, supplying her with the name Beikomu.

"Beikomu Kidomaru…" The name had a nice ring to it. "Have you signed the summoning contract?"

Kidomaru nodded, but said that he wasn't a 'high enough level' to summon the big ones yet. Leaving his game analogy alone, Kidomaru and Fuu chattered about all sorts of things once the bento was consumed.

Once lunch ended, Fuu was a bit happier through the rest of the day now that she at least knew one person in her class who didn't stare at her in that weird way her class did at times, when they thought Fuu wasn't looking. Either way, Fuu was happier, and with food in her belly she could be more focused.

As class ended, Fuu returned to her new home and found a refrigerator and several other kitchen-esque appliances all set up, with a note on the door of the fridge.

"Fuu, Shibuki and I realized that in your haste to go you had forgotten food, so we made some food you can put in bento for the next few days. With care, Shido & Shibuki." Fuu murmured, and quickly opened her fridge to find quantities of rice, fish, a few hard-boiled eggs, some vegetables, and a decent variety of stuff Fuu figured was used in the making of food. Shido-sama had also conveniently left some basic instructions on how to make various food items.

Grinning a little more, Fuu started working on her homework. Today had given Fuu a lot of changes, but not all of them were so bad after all.

 _ **Six Months Later…**_

Fuu showed up to the academy tired but ready, just as she had been doing since that first day with Shido and Shibuki. Every day she would do her work, hang out with Kidomaru during lunch, and sometimes talk for a little bit out of school, but the Beikomu were a harsh clan, and Kidomaru's birth with six arms was something of a rarity.

"The jonin in the clan always say that having six arms is special, that I'm more like the great spiders of old." Kidomaru had told Fuu that statement once, and followed it up with a statement that would have rustled the feathers of more than a few Beikomu clansmen.

"Who cares about the great spider though? I want to be Kidomaru, not the guy who's almost like the spider. Who would name a game 'Guy who's almost like a spider' anyway?" Fuu snorted in laughter. In her heart of hearts though, Fuu felt a twinge of jealousy.

It was better to have a family to make the comparison than having no one.

At this moment in time though, Kidomaru had finally started the process which allowed him to frequently use Kumo Nenkin, which could create everything from ranged ammunition to daggers his eight arms could exploit. Because the Beikomu were so pleased at Kidomaru's progress, he was given a day off.

Kido decided to spend it lazing around with Fuu in the forest to the east of the village, where Fuu's home was located.

"We really need to make traps around your home, Fuu." The Jinchuriki looked up at Kidomaru's suggestion, and the spider user knew that his friend was working out the details in the cogs of her brain.

Fuu grimaced. Everything seemed to change after that ritual, and her treatment from the village had worsened considerably. At best case, people would be neutral and uncaring, at worst their eyes, just like those of her classmates, would dig into her head, assuming jeers and projectiles didn't reach her first.

Just last week, a few had learned about the location of her home. Coming home to find the words "demon" and "monster" spray painted across her home and her windows broken wasn't exactly didn't exactly lend her home a lot of safety.

Luckily for her though, her spider-using friend was now at the point where he could effectively use Kumo Nenkin. Even if Fuu ran out of kunai and shuriken to load traps with, Kidomaru could, in theory, provide a limitless supply of ammo, and his quick-developing spider jutsu ensured limitless possibilities for keeping angry villagers at bay.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad, Kidomaru." Internally, Fuu scoffed at her own words, and externally Kidomaru did the same.

"Not bad? What type of status effect is in your head?" One quick bash to his head later and Kidomaru wisely chose to shut up.

"Honestly though, it's not too bad. If I set up traps and someone gets hurt, I'll get sent to Shido-sama's office, and people will get even angrier. I'm sure it will blow over though…" Kidomaru shrugged.

"If your traps hurt people who are wandering into your territory, so be it! If you let them walk all over you like this, you'll just show them you surrendered, and what will happen then?" Fuu had no answer, and the two descended into silence. Silence that was only interrupted when Kidomaru coughed up some of that gold substance and threw it into the forest, hitting… absolutely nothing.

"My aim is shitty but I know you're there at ten-thirty, come out!" A figure stepped out of the darkness, a package in his hands. Blinking, Fuu recognized a classmate of hers, one of the more neutral ones, but only because he was a stranger.

"Takano, what're you doing here?" Hizen Takano shuffled his feet awkwardly as he spoke up. Takano was a member of the Hizen clan, a kenjutsu and Katon wielding group. He was taller than the majority of the class by an inch or two, but was rather lanky in shape, wore nondescript blue and gray shinobi gear with the kanji for "Takano" embroidered in red on his right shoulder. Takano had light skin, dark eyes, and his hair stuck up at a million different angles, and was long enough to form a dirty-looking ponytail.

"I heard that my cousin caused some damage over here last week, and after I heard about what happened to your place, I decided to help." Kidomaru glared at the Hizen and shifted in front of Fuu's position, but before he could act further, Fuu jumped over to Takano and opened the package he was holding. Inside the package, there was a large scroll and a box of orange balloons.

Without hesitating, Fuu grabbed one balloon and threw it over at a tree, watching as orange paint splattered over the bark, eerily reminiscent of a bloodstain. Looking over at Takano, their classmate stuttered.

"You can use these against them without any risk of legal repercussions…" Fuu smiled, as she allowed the visions of paint-splattered villagers walking out of her forest.

"I like it. Thanks, Takano." Takano nodded and stepped back a couple of feet as he watched Fuu and Kidomaru bring the box of orange paint-filled balloons into Fuu's home, and watched as Kidomaru and Fuu started setting up wire with a few balloons and more wire in surprise.

Takano chuckled at the thought. By the time someone returned from Fuu's house, they would be covered in orange paint and so tied up with wire that they would have to crawl like a worm. The entire trap would turn the would-be attacked into a giant bug.

After knowing that his gift was received with thanks, Takano prepared to retreat before a voice called out to him.

"Hey Takano, you wanna join us?" Takano turned around and saw Fuu waving him over, hands full of wire and balloons. Takano grinned and used a chakra-enhanced leap to Fuu and Kidomaru, noting that the latter seemed neutral about him helping out.

"Sure, it's the least I can do, right?" Fuu nodded, grinning.

The three worked all afternoon long, and by the time their work was done, the sun was setting. Looking around the clearing that surrounded Fuu's home, Takano would call the three of them trap masters.

Spider webs made a pseudo-cage and their enhancement with chakra made them impossible for Kunai or other normal tools to cut through. Balloon, wire, and pitfall traps surrounded Fuu's home, but not far enough to be mistaken for going anywhere else. No, the traps the three of them had set up made a network of defense with multiple layers.

As the three prepared to part ways for the night, Takano jumped up and ran over to the package he had given Fuu.

"Fuu, Fuu, I brought this too!" Fuu looked at the large scroll Takano was carrying, feeling sweat drop as she watched him stumble about with the giant scroll. Finally placing it in front of her, Takano collapsed.

Fuu unraveled part of the scroll, finding it absolutely massive, and noted the kanji in the sealing matrices lining the massive thing, "light".

"Lanterns filled with chakra, light up at night, use nature chakra, last forever," Takano said between deep breaths, "They'll light up the entire forest and fly on their own in the sky." Fuu's eyes widened as she bit her thumb, before swiping her bloodstained thumb across several sealing matrices, and feeling the traditional but pretty lamps which had a variety of faces drawn into the material.

Some faces were recognizable as important people in the village, from the former Takigakure chieftains, to legendary shinobi like the Shodai Hokage and the nuke-nin Kakuzu, to animals of all shapes and sizes. Channeling a little bit of chakra into each one, Takano threw them into the sky as the three watched the lanterns right themselves in midair and hover, glowing with an eerie red light. Fuu liked them immensely.

Fuu took the time to admire her home now that lights were on it.

A ladder loosely hung from a balcony to the ground for her to get up and down, the ladder itself was about fifteen meters long. The house was built around a tree, and there was a small staircase built in with a natural covering that allowed Fuu to inconspicuously go out onto the top of the tree without drawing attention or exposing the existence of the staircase. The house looked deceptively small, but was roomier than it looked, and felt just in line with the forest around it.

Fuu closed her eyes, sitting on her roof, her friend of six months and her newfound friend beside her, and smiled in contentment and peace.

It was a shame that both her peace and contentment wouldn't last forever.

 **This is my first piece of writing for this site in ~6 months, so cut me a little bit of slack if everything isn't in line. If there are any questions, sending PMs or reviews are extremely easy. New updates should come decently soon, and I (rather ambitiously) hope to complete this story with 200k words.**

 **Thanks,**

 **KoS**


	2. Chapter 2: Band of Misfits

**Time to answer some questions/comments from reviews.**

 **nice: Considering it's still Friday where I am, challenge completed. I would ask though that you not request chapters by certain dates. Yes, requests help me get chapters out faster, but I feel that a productive chapter isn't one that's rushed by time constraints. Regardless, this one's up.**

 **DPSS: Indeed he does, and your wish coincides with my plans for plot so it seems we're all happy.**

 **Kronus96: Yeah, but frequent updates, a decently planned plotline, + a certain zeal can get 200k. I personally feel that having Kurama trash the other bijuu at half strength was just Kishimoto making Naruto more powerful, and I don't feel it's logical. If one does the numbers, Kurama's full strength should be 50% of the Ten tails strength, which makes me cringe. Opening with Fuu was a move on my part meant to give a fresh start. So many fics start with Naruto that I felt that trying anything like that would just be pesky. Kidomaru is quite cool. I hope the Bijuu were in character, but they were given so little development (with a few exceptions) it's hard to say. I'm glad to have written** **.**

 **I'm quite impressed by the large number of viewers. Before the first night was up, 100 people had viewed, over ten had followed with a few favoriting, and the first review had arrived. Hopefully the momentum will only go up from here.**

 **Happy hunting, or rather reading!**

While Fuu had plenty of fun with her new friends Takano and Kidomaru in the Village Hidden by the Waterfall, the other Jinchuriki whose life was so richly entwined with the fate of the world was living his life to its fullest, and in what an unorthodox way at that!

 _ **Same Time, Different Place. Hidden Leaf Village**_.

The Village Hidden in the Leaves was a fairly calm place, both inside and out. Villagers mingled freely and in peacetime shinobi could be humans in the village before soldiers.

The Sandaime Hokage was a kind man with a heart for all those in need, and the Leaf (debatably) had the strongest military in the Shinobi world, and had ever since the annihilation of thousands of Iwa Shinobi by the Yondaime Hokage, Minato Namikaze.

Namikaze, while not having a bloodline limit or a clan backing him, was undoubtedly the largest reason the war was won, his Hiraishin no Jutsu allowing him to teleport and obliterate entire platoons of enemy shinobi in a matter of seconds.

A generation of powerful shinobi on the rise emerged from obscurity, and everyone from the dead-last Uchiha Obito to Maito Gai, one of the foremost taijutsu shinobi at an extremely young age, to the cold-blooded comrade-protecting Kakashi Hatake of the Sharingan had a chance to shine for their village, even if glory was cut short by quick and fleeting death.

Even though many in their generations died in combat, the youngsters, the 'Yellow Flash', as Minato was called, and many other impressive men and women fought and eventually the war was won. For the brief reign of Minato as Hokage, Konohagakure had a reign of unprecedented peace and power over their punished neighbors.

Using that power, Minato was able to promote many forms of relief not only to Konoha reconstruction and economic fix, but also to their allies; Sunagakure and Takigakure, whom had both suffered greatly trying to help Konoha in the war effort.

For that reign of unprecedented peace, happiness not only was felt in Konoha, but in those who had ultimately gotten a gain, or perhaps the better term would be lost the least, and no one even thought about rekindling the flames of war just yet.

Unfortunately, true peace can only last so long.

The Kyuubi attack on October 10th turned everything upside down. Thousands died in the beast's rampage, the sight of sharingan in the eyes of the beast put the once proud Uchiha clan who had helped found the village under renewed suspicion, and the glorious Yondaime Hokage was dead, having sold his soul to the Shinigami to protect his village at the far too young age of twenty-six years.

Luckily, many of the villagers knew the old story that even though the Hokage, his wife, and his child had died, the Kyuubi was dead! Minato's death had brought more peace and time for recovery for the Leaf!

Something to note is the fact that the most powerful of tales usually have some truth mixed into bullshit. Sometimes, the truth is only a small component, only a miniscule factor in a huge, oily, burning vat of bullshit.

With that in mind, let us turn our attention to one apartment on the worse-off districts in Konoha.

Sunlight crept into the apartment, as a room came into view. Posters of ramen, famous ninja, more ramen, a few pictures of the actress Yukie Fujikaze, a few more types of ramen, a couple pictures taken of Konoha, and even more ramen appeared were illuminated by sunlight. An alarm clock stood proudly on a bedside table as the small blond in the bed stirred.

Small, thin, with spiky blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, and distinct whisker marks. Without a doubt, this child was undeniable proof that the explanation about the Yondaime Hokage's fate was little more than hogwash. The peaceful moment was broken as the alarm clock decided to mess up the moment, wildly bouncing around like a bunny with Swift Release, at least until a small fist descended on the clock and rather gently stopped it.

Looking around, the child in the bed yawned and got out of bed, tiredly wiping the sleep out of his eyes and moving towards the kitchen.

Three packages of ramen later, Uzumaki Naruto had the fuel he needed for the academy! Getting dressed, Naruto laughed at the thought of the hell he would raise today, and placed goggles on his forehead, grabbed his book bag, and jumped through his window into the world outside.

Half an hour later, the residents of Konoha found obscene words and pictures drawn in paint on their shops and homes. The mess continued on for several blocks and covered entire buildings with graffiti in the form of paint. For several minutes, people looked at the paint as members of the Konoha Police arrived and took notes, preparing to send a document to the Hokage. Once they left, the shocked peace was shattered.

Grinning and laughing from the top of a building was the small figure in a gray t-shirt and green shorts responsible for it all, paint bucket and brush held in his hands.

"My name is Uzumaki Naruto, remember me, because I'll be the Hokage someday!" As the villagers grumbled about bratty children, a team of ANBU appeared on the scene, the captain of the squad appeared in front of Naruto. Staring up at the weird silver hair and the dog mask, Naruto grinned.

This ANBU was one of his favorites.

"Inu-nii, Inu-nii! Do you like my artwork-ttebayo?" The ANBU stared down at Naruto, eyes invisible.

"Uzumaki Naruto, your presence is required by Sandaime Hokage-sama." The ANBU spoke with a seemingly blank tone, but Naruto had heard Inu-nii speak enough to know that there was a brief flicker of amusement. Naruto pouted, knowing that his Jiji would give him nothing but a lecture and some type of detention with Iruka-sensei.

"Nuh-uh, I'm not going with anyone anywhere!" Naruto's childish yell was followed by his leaping away, as the ANBU team sped into motion, knowing they couldn't harm the boy. He was only a child, Jinchuriki or not. Plus, their captain might just kill them if they did.

Laughing, Naruto wildly jumped from building to building, reminiscent of a small monkey. A noisy monkey with blond hair.

"Weasel, right! Cat, left! Crow, behind! Tenzo, you're with me!"

As the little blond ran from building top to building top having the time of his life, Kakashi Hatake felt as if he was watching three different people merged over one frame, in both a painful and refreshing way. Minato-sensei's features were proudly displayed on the boy's face and features, Kushina-nee's boisterous behavior, charm, and ungodly ways of bending all logic were inherited to her son, not to mention the little furry friend in his belly, but that was a much lesser known secret.

The last person Kakashi saw was his old teammate and friend, Obito. Maybe it was the spiky hair. Maybe it was the fact that Obito was always childish until the mission where he died. Maybe, for all Kakashi knew, Obito had been reincarnated inside of Sensei and Kushina's son, which was (in a strange way), how their relationship was sometimes.

"Inu, Inu, Inu, you're not gonna catch me this time, ya big baka!" Said Naruto, twisting himself in midair as a large quantity of paint made its way towards Kakashi. Kakashi was an ANBU after all, no way would anything hit him. That was, until Naruto threw his brush and the paint-filled end splattered on his mask. Well, there's where Obito came into the picture. Rude as always. Anyhow, Kakashi knew that until the mission was over he was no longer a person, but an ANBU, and thus had to leave personal feelings out of the mission until it was over. Kakashi out, Inu in.

"Tenzo." The wood-style user needed no further invitation to act, sprawling branches moving outward, chasing the boy around. Somehow, the result was completely counterproductive. Instead of slowing Naruto down with the multitude of obstacles, the boy merely laughed harder and ran on and around the branches, narrowly evading capture several times.

"Never gonna get me, never gonna get me!" Yelled Naruto, as he threw several smoke bombs and fled the scene. "Try harder, Moku-nii!" Sighing, Inu bit his thumb and ran through hand seals to summon his pack. Kushina's blood was making the boy impossible to capture, and Inu had all of zero ideas how someone's luck could be passed down through blood, nor did he want to find out the extent of that luck.

"No need, taicho. Crow and Weasel are already moving in on his position as we speak." Inu turned to his left to see the purple-haired newbie Neko (Cat) as she jumped towards him. Nodding, Inu moved towards two of the fastest shinobi in the village as they caught their illusive prey.

"Did Inu-nii and Moku-nii give up already, ttebayo?" Naruto turned around to find two ANBU behind him, and the little Jinchuriki's eyes widened. He knew these two from his mischief around the village, Itachi (Weasel) and Kasaru (Crow) were faster than the others!

Ducking by instinct, Naruto felt the black blur of Itachi pass very close above him, as he turned around and saw Kasaru's body fade in and out of visibility, coming extremely close extremely fast. As Naruto turned around and saw Itachi behind him and Kasaru in front of him, he put his hands on his head and started to lie down, catching his breath.

"Aaahhhhh, I'm still not fast enough yet! You two are too fast, Itachi-nii, Kasaru-nii…" Kasaru, who was the far funnier of the two, chuckled and gave Naruto a small bonk on the head. Seeing the pouting blond, Kasaru grinned under his mask and relented.

"To be fair, not many people can get out of my teammate's Mokuton no jutsu or outrun Taicho, even if he wasn't going anywhere near full strength. You're certainly getting more tenacious, that's for sure…" Naruto laughed and bonked Kasaru on the head, as Itachi watched, fearful that someone as prankish as Kasaru was in the making.

Grabbing both Kasaru and Naruto before more shenanigans could occur, the group disappeared in Itachi's Shunshin.

Arriving at the scene of the crime only a couple moments later, Tenzo, Neko, and Inu sighed. All three had an ominous feeling. Not as ominous as the war, but still ominous.

 _ **Only a few minutes earlier**_ …

Sarutobi Hiruzen was having a calm day so far. The Third Hokage had woken up a little bit later than usual, fixed himself and his tiny grandson a nice breakfast, and had a nice cup of tea while he watched the leaves on trees turn a bright, fire-colored painting.

Hiruzen had written a poem about the colors and the Will of Fire. Perhaps he could share the poem to the children? Thinking for all of about three seconds about Hiruzen's surrogate grandson, the Sandaime Hokage knew that wouldn't work.

After he had sent Konohamaru with one of the younger chunin of the Sarutobi, Hiruzen chatted with various Sarutobi clan members, and hadn't had any major issues in the clan, or any that really needed to be resolved.

The Sandaime arrived at the office at a reasonable time, managed to get a pot of strong tea boiling in his office, and didn't seem to have a large workload…

…Until Hiruzen looked up at Izumo and Kotetsu holding enormous stacks of paper. Sighing, the old Sarutobi started scribbling down signatures and reading through paperwork, until he reached a particular document he had been seeing all too lately recently.

Konoha's Police Department had reported vandalism of an entire street, with a suspected culprit in mind. Suspected, meaning only one person had been able to do this scale of vandalism in the past, and he seemed to have a knack for it too.

Snapping his fingers, Hiruzen Sarutobi looked down at the ANBU kneeling before his desk. Silver hair, a dog mask, and one sharingan eye told Sarutobi all he needed to know.

"Inu, take your team and bring Uzumaki Naruto to this office. He appears to have vandalized a civilian section but hasn't appeared just yet to boast about his victory. Bring him to this office, would you?" Inu nodded, but shifted his weight towards the Hokage as if he wanted to turn towards the aging village leader, something Sarutobi noticed.

"Is something bothering you, Kakashi?" Inu removed his mask and sat down in the chair in front of Hiruzen's desk and sat down.

"He's getting more like his mother and father every day, Sandaime-sama. It feels like I'm looking at a ghost sometimes." _And Obito_. Kakashi mentioned silently. Sarutobi nodded, knowing that Kakashi was feeling mighty melancholy. His sensei and Kushina had been somewhere between older siblings and parent figures, God knew Kakashi needed them. Losing Sakumo at such a young age…

"Well, at this rate he'll be even harder to catch than Minato with the Hiraishin." Seeing Kakashi deflate a little bit more, he threw in his trump card.

"Plus, I bet Kushina is laughing herself to no end watching her son. You know, she had a little pranking era of her own." Kakashi raised one eyebrow in amusement and stood up, mask back on.

"Uzumaki Naruto will be brought to this office, sir. You can count on us." Nodding, Hiruzen dismissed Kakashi with a wave of his hand and waited for the little blond troublemaker to be brought back as he carefully looked around at his office.

After checking that no one was present, the Sandaime Hokage reached into a lower drawer and pulled out a book with an orange cover before closing his office door and putting silencing seals up. Had the seals not been active, one might have heard the sound of giggling coming from the Hokage's office.

Several minutes later, Hiruzen felt the presence of three chakra signatures, one of which he recognized as his surrogate grandson's. Hastily wiping the trail of blood coming out of his nose away with a handkerchief and putting his book away, Sarutobi Hiruzen called out a quick "Come in." and prepared a serious enough expression. He had to look like he wasn't just reading Jiraiya's paper gold.

"Hokage-sama, Uzumaki Naruto as requested." Came from the ever monotonous voice of Uchiha Itachi, as one hand rested on Naruto's shoulder, the other on Kasaru's.

"Little Naruto gave us quite the run today, Hokage-sama. If he wasn't getting faster to outrun us, I'd almost think he was using the Shunshin." Despite Kasaru's casual demeanor, the words of praise weren't lost to Hiruzen or Naruto, the latter gazing up with happiness in his eyes.

"Oh? That's quite the praise coming from you, Kasaru." The black-haired Kasaru ANBU nodded, and even though the mask covered his face, a grin was clearly formed.

As Hiruzen lectured Naruto about how Hokage can't vandalize property, the values of responsibility, and how much of a hassle he had caused, Kasaru zoned out a little bit, thinking about Naruto's speed. If _that_ jutsu was taught to him, Naruto could easily become faster than the Fourth. For a few seconds, Kasaru internally considered what would happen if Naruto became his unofficial apprentice or something like that. _Me, a sensei or a shishou? No way._ Kasaru glanced down at the blond trying hard to ignore the piercing stare and lecture combo from his surrogate grandfather, and was failing. _Heh, the kid does have guts though, I'll respect that_. _Knowing what I do, I bet he'll be one hell of a leader down the road. Charisma like that goes long ways…_

As the lecture came to a close, Itachi placed one hand on Naruto and shunshin'd him off. Turning towards the Hokage, Kasaru kneeled.

"Permission to remove my mask and make a request, Hokage-sama?" Nodding, the Hokage eyed the now unmasked Kasaru. Three tomoe sharingan were active, and short black hair in a rustled mess made Uchiha Shisui's resemblance to Hiruzen's old friend and Shisui's ancestor Kagami even more apparent.

"I would like to make a deal about Naruto and was hoping for your approval on the matter." Sarutobi raised one eyebrow and nodded, one hand gesturing for Shisui to continue.

"I was thinking I could teach him during my free time on the grounds that he wouldn't prank as much." Sandaime Hokage Hiruzen's eyebrows vanished into the Hokage's hat. That was an unexpected turn for sure.

"And what makes you so interested in teaching him, Shisui?" Shisui blinked before struggling to find the right words.

"He reminds me a bit of how I was when I was a little kid; doing everything I could to get the Uchiha clan to notice me when they had Itachi to fuss over. Hell, I would have given so much to have someone see me and not see someone worse than Itachi in those days, and I bet the kid feels the same way. I think that's why he pulls so many pranks."

Hiruzen looked out of the window, out over his village… Yes. Shisui had never been the strongest shinobi until he had made his motive the defeat of Uchiha Itachi, and Shisui had done so with a revolutionary use of Shunshin.

"What do you intend to teach him, Shisui?" Shisui blinked again before responding.

"I want to teach him some of the basics, improving his speed and work with kunai and shuriken. I'm not gonna try to pass on my Shunshin prowess. If I'm gonna teach Naruto, he's gonna become strong his own way, not using my path." Hiruzen smiled warmly, internally he had been hoping Shisui might pass on the Shunshin to Naruto, but Naruto was also fairly good at doing his own thing and coming out on top.

"Also, I think Naruto just needs someone to talk to, someone to listen. When he does those pranks, he gets himself out into the open and waits for our squad or someone he recognizes to hunt him down. He likes not having a head start, and really likes talking to Inu-taicho too." Hiruzen weighed the options in his head.

This could blow up in his face, theoretically. Shisui didn't mention his own pranking days for a reason, and lord forbid what would happen if Shisui got with another like-minded prankster as a child…

But the benefits were too hard to ignore. Naruto needed that human connection, especially when entering the academy. His lack of support outside of school could definitely cost him valuable assets his class curriculum would assume he already had.

"Give me some time to write up the paperwork and I'll make it official. Congratulations, Shisui. You'll have an apprentice by the end of today. Meet Naruto on training ground five sometime after his school time is up, and if you're free, you can learn more about your apprentice during the day." Bowing his head, Shisui's smile went unseen but definitely known about by the Hokage.

"Thank you, Hokage-sama." With that, Shisui shunshin'd out, and only a few seconds before the other members of Team Kakashi entered the room, with their captain still paint-splattered. The Hokage martialed his face such that his smile at seeing the bright orange paint was invisible externally.

"Inu, Tenzo, and Neko reporting for duty, Hokage-sama. Target apprehended by Uchiha Itachi and Uchiha Shisui and brought here. Mission success." As the Hokage nodded at the late teammates, Kakashi and the others disappeared as well.

Well, at least today was different from the usual…

At the front of the academy, two figures shunshin'd into existence. The first was a young man with a weasel mask and grey armor over black clothing, the second was the young prankster responsible for the Hokage's rather interesting morning.

"Naruto-kun, don't make any more trouble today, do you understand me?" Naruto pouted but nodded, huffing as he walked off towards the academy. Walking to his classroom, Naruto saw two open seats. The first was next to Uchiha Sasuke, who was apparently some hotshot in the class. As if.

Looking around, Naruto saw the other open seat next to a kid with a long coat that went up to his face.

The kid had sunglasses so dark his eyes were invisible, and his hair stuck up, though not in the Naruto way, and not really in the struck-by-lightning kind either. It just kinda stuck up. As Naruto stood in the doorway, his homeroom teacher noticed him with a tick on his forehead.

"Sit down next to Shino today, Naruto." Nodding, Naruto dropped his bags next to his classmate and sat down, taking in the way that bugs flew around the kid's head.

"Heyo-ttebayo!" Shino blankly looked at Naruto, taking in the greeting before putting one hand in front of him.

"My name is Aburame Shino. What's yours?" Shaking the hand, Naruto replied with his own name, and watched as Shino held the same palm he shook Naruto's hand with to the ceiling. Almost immediately, bugs crawled from Shino's long coat onto his hand for a few seconds, their little heads poking at Shino's skin. A few seconds later, the insects retreated.

Trying to ignore the situation with Shino's bugs (Naruto really didn't want to risk trouble so soon after visiting the Hokage's office), the blond kid looked towards his sensei as the man gave a lecture.

"Today we'll be going over these kanji, does anyone know what they say?" Immediately a number of hands went up, including Shino's. Naruto squinted at the word before his sensei called on a student.

"Those kanji mean friend!" Naruto frowned. Who were his friends? That lazy pineapple-haired Shikamaru had that chub-*cough* rotund Choji as his friend, the kid with the dog was friends with a couple of the civilians, Sasuke had his swarms of fans (even if he chose to avoid them as much as humanly possible), and Shino… Well, Naruto was sure Shino had some friends.

Who were Naruto's friends? Ayame and Teuchi at Ichiraku Ramen came to mind, but he was a favored client of theirs, not exactly a friend. Was the Hokage his friend? No, Hokage-jiji was his grandfather in all but blood, but he was the Hokage. Naruto would be his successor, not friend. Whom did that leave?

Naruto grinned. Was the ANBU team that hunted him down when he did pranks his friends? Naruto could certainly name them on his fingers and knew a thing or two about them. Inu was their leader and he had spiky hair, and Inu also had a pack of dogs that appeared from smoke clouds. Moku could make trees from his arms and had a cat mask. Neko didn't have a cat mask despite her name and was something of an older sister figure even more than the others were older brothers.

Itachi had a ponytail and spoke in a monotone, but not in a mean way. Naruto knew Itachi was cool, almost as cool as Naruto was himself! And then there was Kasaru, who laughed with Naruto whenever he pranked, and Naruto had the feeling that Kasaru was ever so slightly regretful he had to apprehend Naruto for his pranking.

But were they his friends? Weren't friends supposed to be around his age? As Naruto let the debate run its course in his head for a while, he listened into one sentence his sensei was saying.

"…And as you all know, the test will be after lunch. And one more thing, everything on that test was stuff we reviewed in class this morning through now. You should know everything. It's the exact same material we've been working with this morning. I do expect high scores." Naruto started to sweat. This was his first test and he didn't know anything except how to read the word 'friend'! Naruto didn't even know what his own definition of the word 'friend' was!

Trying not to show his panic, Naruto walked outside and saw one of his classmates sitting alone with the same panicked look on his face that Naruto had in his mind. The kid had a brown jacket, black slits for eyes, elongated canines, and red marks on his cheeks in the shape of fangs. A small puppy ran around his ankles, desperately trying to get his owner's attention.

Walking over, Naruto decided that it was time to get a friend.

"Hey, you nervous about the test too?" Naruto's classmate looked up and nodded. Naruto stuck out his hand in introduction.

"Me too, my name's Uzumaki Naruto!" The kid stood up, still nervous, and shook the hand.

"Inuzuka Kiba, and this is Akamaru. This test is gonna be the death of us! My mom's gonna kill me!" Kiba held up his canine companion as he sniffed Naruto's hand and barked in happiness. Naruto smiled, but felt a slight pang at the mention of mother. Shaking his head, Naruto quickly thought of some way, any way to fix the chaos he had found himself in!

"I know, let's find Shikamaru! He's smart enough to figure out how to get through this test!" Kiba nodded and the two students plus Akamaru ran off towards their lazy classmate and his rotund friend sitting, or in Shikamaru's case lying on a shaded bench, sharing a bag of chips.

"Shikamaru, Shikamaru, we need help ttebayo!" The lazy Nara looked up at Naruto and Kiba, one eye half-open, the other closed as if asleep.

"What do you want, troublesome classmates?" Naruto and Kiba explained their predicament, as Shikamaru watched without a reaction, which lasted until he gave a mischievous smile.

"Choji and I have the same problem, we're gonna sneak out. They can't give us a test of doom if we're not there!" Kiba and Naruto's eyes widened as the two started pleading.

"Shikamaru, I'll give you so much ramen if you help me, ttebayo!"

"Please Shika, you always complain about how troublesome your mom is, and mine is even more terrifying!"

"Shikamaru please, we'll be your best friends forever!"

"I'll let you play with me and Akamaru! Choji too!"

"Be quiet! Do you want us to get caught before we even try to leave?" Shikamaru hissed, and the four troublemakers turned to look for any teachers nearby. None were around, it seemed that their sensei's attention was firmly fixed on the horde of fans surrounding the resident Uchiha.

Shikamaru grinned again, sat up, and gestured for his three classmates to bring their heads closer.

"We're going to hide until Roku-sensei tells everyone to get back in. By the time they check to make sure everyone's there we'll be long gone! The only issue I can see is that I don't know anywhere that's safe where we can hide for a sustained amount of time." Naruto and Kiba frowned, neither knew what sustained meant, but they had the rough idea.

"So we need somewhere we can camp out for a long time until school is out, ttebayo?" Shikamaru and Choji nodded, and the Inuzuka turned his attention to Naruto. Akamaru sat happily on the bench.

"We can hide in my apartment. It's not in one of the better parts of town, but it can hold the four of us, and I know a few places we can hide if someone comes looking for us there. I even have ramen and some other food in the fridge for us to eat while we're there." The food bit sold Choji, and the instant Choji agreed and the pros were mentioned, Shikamaru's grin was even wider. The hole in his plan was filled, it seems. Kiba was nervous at first, but upon seeing Shikamaru happy, decided that it was now or never.

"Well boys, lets get our plan in action, shall we?" Seeing his co-conspirators nodding and grabbing their lunches, Shikamaru gestured to a nearby bunch of bushes that were thick enough to hide themselves, especially since their clothes and hair colors were mostly in line with natural phenomenon. At the very least, Shikamaru was grateful no one had anything horrendously un-shinobilike. Like an orange jumpsuit. That would suck.

"Keep it down and get in a position you can hold, we gotta stay here for a whole twenty minutes before lunch is over." The four went through the brambles and settled themselves. Shikamaru lay down and was out like a light, taking a nap in the sun. Choji kept time and continued eating his chips, but much quieter. Kiba sat in the shade of a tree with greenery all around it, and sat back against the trunk while petting the white puppy in his lap. Naruto sat back against the wall and observed his classmates.

Could they be his friends? Shikamaru was certainly one of the smartest in the class, even if he was lazy. The Choji kid seemed nice enough, and came along with Shikamaru. The two seemed very loyal to each other at least, and neither was mean to him like the villagers were. Turning his attention to Kiba, Naruto reflected that despite the Inuzuka being proud in class sometimes, they were rather similar. Both were worried about the test, cool enough, and had unkempt hair.

They might not have the posse of fans following them like Sasuke, or the intelligence of Shino, but at least they weren't asses like the former or weirdos like the latter. They were their own people, and until Naruto could rule the academy with an iron fist, it couldn't hurt to have friends. Plus, Naruto was having fun with a surge of adrenaline. Not the adrenaline that he had when running from Inu-nii and the other ANBU, or the fun that he had while eating at Ichiraku's with Hokage-jiji, but in a new, covert type of fun.

It felt nice to be sneaky and doing things without knowing them. Before long, Naruto imagined the confusion of Roku-sensei as he wondered where the four had gone. Stifling a giggle which got him the attention of Choji and Kiba, Naruto waved the two of them and mouthed 'once we get out', which had them both nod.

Fifteen minutes later, Choji nudged Shikamaru and held up five fingers, at which the lazy Nara nodded and sat up, bringing the four together again.

"Five minutes till lunch ends, but sensei is probably counting up names in the next minute or two. If we want out, now is the time. Anyone getting cold feet?" At the sight of three head shakings, Shikamaru nodded and snuck low to the ground as the others followed. Seeing the gate to the academy open, Shikamaru gestured as the four ran, Kiba and Naruto taking the lead before long with Shika not too far behind and Choji bringing up the rear, looking back to make sure no one was watching. Akamaru, content with the adventure, sat on Kiba's head.

From the shadows of a tree, a figure pushed black sunglasses further up his nose as he ensured the female bikochu he had placed on his classmate was transmitting its location. Once Shino could feel its pheromones being emitted, Shino walked back towards his class, where Roku-sensei was checking off names. The Aburame knew he was an observer, and right now he was curious to observe what his classmates were doing.

"Quickly, follow me!" Naruto led his friends through back alley after back alley, taking no rests as they went from the well-cared buildings surrounding the Hokage Tower and the clan houses, going from the upper cost housing further and further out until the four found themselves in the shadier part of town, following Naruto as he led them up a fire ladder on an old brick building.

Once Naruto got off the ladder at the top floor, Naruto doubled over, sucking in deep breaths of air as his three compatriots came up the ladder after him. Once Naruto saw Choji step off the ladder, bringing up the rear, Naruto used his key and opened the door to his apartment. Moving towards the kitchen to grab four glasses and filling them up with water. Passing three to his friends and keeping one for himself, Naruto sat down on his bed, as his friends made themselves at home while getting much-needed oxygen into their systems.

"That was a really troublesome journey, Naruto. -huff-huff- But it was worth it. They won't come that far looking for us -huff- because they need to keep an eye on the class." Naruto nodded, closed his eyes in tiredness, and laid down for a couple minutes before a stomach growl sounded throughout the apartment. Opening his eyes, Naruto saw his classmates looking at Choji, who in turn looked at his own stomach, and then at Naruto.

"Hey Naruto, you said you had ramen around here, right?" Nodding, Naruto stood up, yawned, and went into the kitchen with Choji not too far behind.

As the two started fixing ramen for the entire group, Choji opened Naruto's refrigerator and put some vegetables the Sandaime had given him into the mix once the ramen was done. Looking over at Choji, he saw the pudgy boy grabbing food out of the refrigerator and starting to cook some with a pan and some oil.

Naruto was about to go off on Choji and deliver the large vat of ramen to the table, but stopped when he saw Choji throw some hard-boiled eggs and cut up scallions, bok choy, mushrooms, and corn into the mixture, with a little bit of oil.

Realizing that Choji was adding some of the stuff Ichiraku added to a lot of ramen, Naruto stopped. Once Choji was done, he nodded at Naruto who put the vat on the table as Kiba and Shikamaru walked over. The four friends grabbed chopsticks, spoons, and decently sized bowls to hold ramen in.

As Naruto refilled the water glasses, he put them down and stopped his friends from eating or drinking for a second.

"A toast, to success!" The four held glasses up, clinked them, cheered, and dug into the masterpiece Choji and Naruto had created.

In another place at the same time, a figure sighed before walking out of the door. It looked like someone, or perhaps a few someones were getting in trouble again.

"Okay, since Naruto and I made the ramen, Kiba and Shikamaru do the dishes. That sound good?" A moan of complain from Shikamaru was all that was heard as the two given the task stood up and worked to complete it. Before long into the dishwashing, a knock was heard on Naruto's door. Immediately, Shikamaru turned off the water as he and Kiba put the dishes down in Naruto's sink.

"Naruto, someone's at the door, we gotta hide." Naruto nodded and pointed under his bed. Luckily, the blankets on his bed were long, meaning they went very close to the floor and would provide maximum cover for anyone hiding under but were easily movable if anyone wanted to look up. Just as Naruto decided this was the case, he heard the jingle of keys. Panicking, Naruto shooed them all under, and just in time.

The escape artists of the academy were under the bed. As it was, the four, despite being so small, didn't have a lot of room. The four barely laid themselves out so that each one's head was facing away from the wall. Any one of them could grab the blanket and lift it to view the one knocking on the door. Shikamaru, being the smartest of the bunch, put one ear to the blanket and listened to the decently soft footfalls. Strangely, the sound of… sandals being removed was the first thing he heard? Before Shikamaru could process this new development, a voice sounded out.

"Hm, what a nice smell in the air. Someone must have been making ramen." Naruto's eyes widened as he almost gave a gasp. Turning towards his friends he held up three fingers, and whispered "Sandaime no Jiji." The other three's eyes widened as they shrunk further back, hoping the Hokage wasn't looking for them.

"I have to wonder though, why this smell would still be around? Unless, someone's been cooking in here recently…" The Sandaime moved over towards the sink, noting the packaged ramen and comparing it with the remaining vat of ramen Choji had helped make.

"Hm, transforming normal ramen into restaurant quality ramen? Only an Akimichi can do something quite like that." Choji's eyes widened as he started to panic a little bit.

"And half-rinsed dishes, still warm. Looks like this room was definitely in use recently. I could only wonder by whom?" The four began sweating again. Of all the times for the Hokage to come for a visit to Naruto's apartment… Shikamaru gave a quick look from under the covers, and observed the man.

A long red robe with a shorter white around it, a white hat with red on it and fabric going down to the shoulders? No mistake. Were there any doubts in the young genius's mind that this was really and truly the Hokage, they were squashed.

"And look at that, bento boxes lying around? This one says Nara, and this one Inuzuka, and, oh look, an Akimichi. Looks like I'm not _quite_ as senile as Konohamaru thinks." All four tensed at the sounds of the clan names being spoken. How could they have forgotten to take their stuff away? Oh, that's right. They barely had enough time to get down as it was.

"Hm, they look like academy students lunches, but I know the academy is in session right now, how could this be?" Hiruzen didn't sound mad in the slightest, but he was calmly curious, in that grandfatherly way he was. While the lack of negative emotion made the boys feel better, it didn't help much because the village _leader_ could discover them at any moment.

"Well, if I ever ran into the students who weren't at the academy, I'd have to tell those students' parents they were skipping school. Perhaps if they stay in class, we can let bygones be bygones and forget this ever happened, hm..." Sighing, Hiruzen walked over to his sandals, the white cloth on the sides of the Hokage's hat obscuring the smile the Hokage wore.

Hiruzen may love to portray himself as a kind old man at times, but he was still quite the good actor, and hopefully the message went across. He really would hate to be the one to condemn Kiba to Tsume's wrath, Shikamaru to Yoshino's, or Choji to Choza's disappointment.

Before he left though, Hiruzen said one more thing.

"Oh, that's right. If I run into Naruto any time soon, he needs to know that he has to go to training ground five after school, someone wants to see him there." Furrowing his eyebrows in confusion, Naruto wondered who would want to see him there. Oh well, at least Sandaime-jiji was leaving. As the Hokage put his sandals on, he hummed a small tune and walked out, making sure to close the door and lock it behind him.

Once all four were sure the Hokage had left, they slowly and quietly crept out. Kiba was about to make it towards the dishes, but Shikamaru stopped him.

"If the Hokage were to come again and see stuff moved around, he'd know someone was in here. Even so, why would he be speaking out loud about Naruto's plans unless…" Shikamaru's eyes widened as he put a hand to his forehead, a mutter of "mendokuse" coming from the lazy child.

"What is it, Shika?" Choji asked, curiously looking at the door the Sandaime left from.

"Sandaime-sama must have known we were there, that's why he listed the clan names on our lunch boxes and mentioned Naruto's plans…" Naruto frowned.

"Why would Sandaime-jiji not find us then?" This time, Choji spoke up.

"Maybe he wanted to give us a second chance and have bygones be bygones like he said?" Kiba nodded with Choji's observation, hoping to all deities he knew of that his mother wouldn't find out he had skipped school.

Shikamaru shrugged and closed his eyes, but grinned.

"Even though this was kinda terrifying, we should hang out again. It felt kinda adventurous." Kiba and Choji nodded, and the happiness in Naruto's grin could split the heavens.

"Yeah!" And with that, Naruto knew his first friends had arrived in his life, and were there to stay.

 **13 pages, 7000 words, not too shabby for a chapter, eh? Finally we get to our blond-haired protagonist and his happy band of misfits! For those who like references and similarities, I put one in this chapter that connects with last chapter. Kudos to anyone who finds it!**

 **With finals done I should be able to pump out chapters faster than children in a Naruto x harem story.**

 **Cheers,**

 **~KOS**


	3. Chapter 3: King's Genius

**So Chapter 2 sets us up with some context as to what our favorite Konoha Jinchuriki is up to, but there's more than meets the eye here.**

 **At the time of this upload there is about 20 favorites and 19 followers or something along those lines, along with 6 reviews, and around 550 hits in total.**

 **Lightningblade49: Fuu is liked by all of two people plus the village leader and his family who know the benefits and risks of Jinchuriki and keeping them loyal to the village. It does level the playing field some, ne?**

 **Kronus96: Shisui and Naruto are extremely similar. Yeah, Hiruzen's portrayal is downright weak in a lot of stories I've read, which really doesn't fit the man who ripped the souls out of his teachers and part of his student's soul while being pierced with the Kusanagi. I attribute the Kurama and Gyuuki vs Bijuu piece more to the fact that the Bijuu and Jinchuriki are all being forced to do certain things by Tobi** _ **against their wills**_ **, while Gyuuki and Kurama are in full control of their actions, kinda like how Tobirama and Hashirama could wreck Orochimaru's Edo Tensei if they wanted while at full power. Kurama being at half-power is assumed because Kurama's chakra is broken into Yin and Yang, with the Yang part in Naruto and Yin with Minato in the Shinigami, assuming Yin and Yang are equal. That's my theory anyhow.**

 **Theman1111: What fun would it be if I told you that this early in the story? Keep reading and you'll find out!**

 **Hope this chapter is okay, KoS.**

On the edge of training ground five, the small blond-haired Jinchuriki allowed the words of his surrogate Grandfather to run in his head one more time… _If I run into Naruto any time soon, he needs to know that he has to go to training ground five after school, someone wants to see him there_ …

But who wanted to see him? Why?

As Naruto walked onto the empty field, he saw a shinobi training. Curious if this was the right person, Naruto watched. The person was certainly much older than Naruto, maybe fourteen or fifteen, was teleporting around like there was no tomorrow, and was throwing flaming kunai and flaming shuriken at training dummies.

Naruto's eyes nearly popped out of his sockets when he saw the mysterious ninja slash through the air with a small tanto and a few waves of fire came out. Panting slightly, the ninja walked over to what Naruto presumed was a lunchbox of some kind and pulled out a bottle of water. Drinking the whole thing in one go, the ninja formed a half ram seal and vanished, only for a rustle of air to appear behind Naruto.

"You must be Uzumaki Naruto, am I right?" Naruto looked up at the grinning figure behind him. At a height of average stature, the ninja had black pants, a high collared dark shirt with the Uchiha crest on the back, and his tanto rest in a sheath on his back with part of it visible on his front.

The Uchiha had spiky black hair not unlike Naruto's, if one doesn't mind the color difference. Eyebrows turned up above three-tomoe Sharingan with a broad nose between them. A grin occupied the rest of his face, giving the shinobi an almost childlike feel.

"Yeah, are you the one who wanted to see me ttebayo?" Shisui Uchiha nodded and extended his hand.

"Uchiha Shisui, Jonin." Naruto took the hand and shook it.

"Uzumaki Naruto, future Hokage!" Shisui grinned at the kid, even more happy with the decision he made earlier.

"Well Naruto, a friend of mine in the ANBU Black Ops has told me you've been causing a lot of trouble recently." Naruto pouted and turned around, sitting down.

"I already got chewed out by the Hokage-ttebayo. Lay off me would ya?" Shisui laughed at the childish reaction that fit Naruto so well.

"You should know that I was a bit of a troublemaker myself, and when my friend in ANBU told me about someone who could paint several blocks of obscene words and images without being caught until revealing himself, I was quite impressed." Naruto looked up over his shoulder with a bit of wonder. No one had complimented his pranks before! No one!

"And well, I made a deal with the Hokage, and now I'd like to present the deal to you." Naruto blinked and nodded, waiting for the proposition.

"If you cut down your pranking by a bit so it's not a daily thing, I'll take you on as my apprentice. You've seen just what I can do, and the majority of my skills are unique only to me." Shisui watched as Naruto's grin increased tenfold like a kid in a candy shop. Well, Shisui figured that for a ninja, techniques could be comparable to candy. Murderous, sometimes destructive, and continually usable candy, but candy nonetheless!

"We got a deal?" Naruto's nods of reply were so fast that his head became a yellow blur, but then slowed up in confusion.

"Hey Shisui-sensei, who's your friend in ANBU?" Shisui held a grin and assumed a neutral expression.

"I'm sorry Naruto, but ANBU are confidential for a reason." Naruto crunched up his eyebrows in concentration.

"Oh, is it Inu? Or no, it must be Neko-nee or Kasaru-baka!" Shisui raised an internal eyebrow at the "Kasaru-baka", but decided to let it slide. Taking out a scroll and a writing utensil, Shisui sat down with Naruto directly in front of him.

"Well kid, let's not get bogged down with details, shall we? First, let's work on understanding chakra. Chakra is…"

 _ **Two days later.**_

"Shikamaru, Choji's here. Get your lazy tail end down the stairs now!" Groaning at the cry of his mother, Shikamaru Nara walked towards the sound of his mother's voice as he saw his best friend at the top of the staircase.

"Hey Choji, what's up?" Choji shrugged and ate a couple chips before responding.

"I was thinking we could find Naruto and Kiba again. Even though you-know-what was kinda terrifying, maybe we could do something a bit more… tame." Nodding, Shikamaru grabbed his jacket and a few bags of chips, plus a few ryo in case they needed to buy something while they were wandering.

"Mom, Choji and I are going to find Kiba." After hearing his mother's yell in affirmative, the two departed. Choji turned to Shikamaru.

"Why didn't you add the fact that we were gonna find Naruto too?" Shikamaru shook his head.

"My old man wouldn't want me going into a shady part of town, and my mom has some grudge against Naruto, which I don't really get. He hasn't pranked us, and she's never met him." Choji nodded, but continued wondering why Naruto was disliked by the Nara matriarch.

"Let's go find Kiba first, then we can hunt down that troublesome Naruto." The two quickly moved to the Inuzuka compound, ignoring the barks of numerous canines as they knocked on the clan leader's door. As Kiba's mother Tsume saw the two of them, she opened the door and asked if they were looking for Kiba. When told she was correct, Tsume yelled at her son to see his friends who were visiting him.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Kiba showed up in his usual clothes, Akamaru resting on his shoulder. Kiba seemed more relaxed than the day of their escape from the academy.

"We were gonna find the fourth member of our troublesome group from a few days ago. You wanna come with us?" Kiba gave a thumbs up, and looking towards his mother for approval, grinned when she nodded and shooed the three of them off.

"So where do you think Naruto is now?" Shikamaru and Choji froze. They hadn't thought of that.

"Ugh. Damn good question, Kiba. I forgot the way to his apartment." Kiba sighed as he facepalmed and Akamaru shook his head in disappointment.

"Here, we'll sniff him out, sound good?" Upon seeing Choji's smile in response, Kiba took that for a yes.

"Let's go to the east first and see what we can find, sound good?"

"Sure, but don't get us into your troublesome situations." Kiba's eyes bugged out and pointed at Shikamaru.

"Hey hey hey, don't go blaming me! It was your plan which got the Sandaime on our asses!" Choji looked around at the people starting to stare at their conversation, probably wondering what Kiba meant by 'Sandaime on asses'.

"Hey guys, can we save the fighting for a place that isn't the middle of town? We're getting stares…" Sighing, Choji's friends/companions moved towards the east until they ran into another, more alone-looking classmate of theirs.

"Here, Kiba. How about you use your sense of smell to find Naruto and meet us here when you find him." Kiba shrugged and walked off with Akamaru, as Choji and Shikamaru collapsed on a nearby bench which was thankfully shaded.

As minutes passed by, they saw a classmate of theirs walking around, a little bit of sweat forming on his forehead. Their classmate didn't look arrogant like he usually did, but more like the way a six year old naturally looked, filled with actual emotions.

"Hey Sasuke, what are you doing?" The raven-haired Uchiha turned towards Choji and Shikamaru. Sasuke was about to turn away from his classmates and walk away but he listened and heard more, this time from Choji.

"Sasuke, you look down, and you're boiling in the sun. Wanna sit with us?" Sasuke turned back, and looked at the empty space on the bench beside Choji. Truth be told, the shade looked pretty nice, and he _did_ feel a tad bit lonely…

Sasuke reluctantly sat down beside his classmates, and saw something moving towards him. Shinobi instincts kicking in, Sasuke immediately tensed and turned towards whatever it was, only to find…! Choji's hand offering a chip. Blinking, Sasuke took the chip and tasted it.

"This chip bag's label says the chips have the magical pizza flavoring." Sasuke blinked.

"What does that even mean?" Choji shrugged and replied that he had no clue.

"So what's got you so down?" Sasuke sighed and turned towards his classmates before speaking.

"My nii-san and Father got in a bad fight. I don't think I've heard either of them shout like they did." Choji pat his classmate on the shoulder.

"It'll get better eventually. People don't have hatred running through their veins, especially when it comes to family. Deep down they love each other just like any other father and son would." Sasuke shrugged, not really believing Choji. Blinking, Sasuke remembered something from a couple days ago.

"So why were you guys absent from taking that test? Roku-sensei seemed really unhappy with you guys." Shikamaru snorted and Choji gave a slight chuckle.

"We, Naruto, and Kiba skipped it. We hung out at Naruto's apartment for like three hours." Sasuke blinked and looked at the Nara incredulously.

"Really? Why? How?" Shikamaru sighed and rubbed his eyes.

"One question at a time. Why; I didn't feel like taking it and I didn't want Choji to take it without me, and when Naruto and Kiba came to me asking about what to do about the test, I told myself 'may as well bring them into the plan', and things fell into place." Shikamaru took a breath.

"Choji, help me with some details in case I forget them, okay? Recalling this thing is quite troublesome." Choji nodded and gave a thumbs up, and with that Shikamaru started.

"The original plan was for Choji and me to hide in some brambles, but with four people and one puppy we had to cram in a little. It was difficult getting in and out, but once we got to the little clearing we had plenty of room to hide and rest." Choji nodded and added his own two cents.

"I didn't think the clearing would hold that many of us or hide that many of us effectively. Just goes to show how sneaky we are, eh Shika?" Shikamaru shook his head.

"More like how much people will ignore if they're not looking for something specific… Where was I?"

"Clearing and brambles." Said Sasuke helpfully.

"Ah, that's right. So we stayed there for a while until lunch was almost up, then we ran out of the gate and followed Naruto to his apartment." Sasuke didn't question the logic of going to Naruto's apartment – no way would a clan house work to hide academy students skipping. Too many people, too high a chance of getting caught. Not that Sasuke had ever skipped, but when Cousin Shisui came over to tell stories…

"And then we ran into his place and had to catch our breath for a few minutes. His apartment is all the damn way across the village, and to stay out of sight we had to go through a ton of back alleys. I don't think I'd ever ran that far in my life, wouldn't you agree, Choji?" The chubby Akimichi nodded, remembering how afraid he was of being left behind in such a long run. At least Naruto and Kiba weren't too fast…

"And then we fixed ourselves a huge vat of ramen which Choji spiced up with a ton of veggies in Naruto's fridge, great post-run snack by the way. Anyhow, we were starting to clean off our dishes when we heard a knock on the door." Sasuke's eyes widened, and the Uchiha boy was now invested in learning the end of the story. It was unthinkable that they had managed to sneak out of the academy with such a… such a smart plan! No one at that age could do something like that, maybe not even Itachi! Well, Itachi probably could, but still!

"And Naruto just managed to get us all under his bed with no time to spare, and the door opened." Choji nodded and added his take.

"Luckily Naruto got us all in so that we could lift up the blanket. We didn't have a second to lose. Anything else we could have done to fix our situation would've gotten us caught." The Nara heir nodded.

"Yeah, so imagine the scene if you can, Sasuke. We're all lying right beside each other under the bed like innards of a sushi roll. If someone opened the bed cover even a little, they would find not one, but all of us. Meanwhile the kitchen is a mess." Sasuke at this point had the beginnings of a smile. Sasuke had to admit this story was a little funny.

"Tons of left over vegetables are lying across the counter, a vat of still warm ramen is right beside it, and these half-washed dishes are in the sink, also still warm. Nevermind the fact that four academy lunchboxes and backpacks are sitting around, and of course Kiba's, Choji's, and mine all have our clan names and symbols on em. And then you've got four idiots and a puppy who all smell like ramen hiding under a bed." Sasuke laughed. Even though he figured their story was some figment of their imaginations, it was still quite a funny one.

"So then we hear the guy take his sandals off as he walks in, and he starts speaking about smelling the ramen, and for a second we think he's saying all of his observations for whatever reason, and then Naruto wigs out and tells us it's the Hokage in his apartment." If Sasuke's eyes were wide before, their width was nothing compared to them now.

"And the Hokage talks about how if he knew who the academy lunchboxes belonged to he would tell them about not shirking duty and how he would have to tell the parents their children were skipping on a test day and blah blah blah, and for a second we all think we're lucky to come across this information. Then he says if he found Naruto he'd tell him something or other about a training ground, and the guy just puts on his sandals again and leaves!"

"And he didn't find you?" Shikamaru scratched his scalp a little.

"Well here's the thing; I'm pretty sure he knew we were there all along, and he was saying his observations out loud in that old man-ish way he has, you know. Point is, he knew exactly where we were, frightened us a little by entertaining the notion of telling our parents, and leaves." Choji chuckled at the memory, and Sasuke snorted a little at the old man-ish part.

"And we just wait there for a few minutes, and it isn't until I look at all the evidence till I realize this, and I feel like an idiot. There we were thinking we had outfoxed the Hokage and thought we were all big deals when I mentioned it. Disappointment of the century, I tell ya. Troublesome situation all around." Sasuke actually laughed out loud at the last bit.

"Thanks for making up a story to make me feel better, but there's no way that's true. My dad says the Hokage is just a senile old man, there's no way he'd be that clever" Choji looked over at Sasuke and Shikamaru raised an eyebrow.

"No lies here, Sasuke. Real deal. And plus, the Hokage is supposed to be the most powerful ninja in the village, why would he just be some old geezer?" Sasuke shook his head.

"Wait until Kiba gets back here then, or wait until we find Naruto, and either one of them will tell you it's true." Sasuke frowned.

"Didn't you say the Hokage wanted Naruto to go to a training ground?" Shikamaru blinked and looked at Choji.

"That's true, he might be at a training ground! Thanks for the help, Sasuke!" The Uchiha nodded as the two other occupants of the bench stood up, one holding a hand out to the Uchiha.

"You wanna come with us?" Sasuke looked at Choji's hand and then at the Akimichi's grin and found no evil. Accepting the hand, Sasuke departed with the duo as they made for the training grounds.

Luckily for most Konoha-nin, the training grounds were extremely close to one another. Starting with ground 1 and onward, they moved until they found training ground five, where Naruto was dodging blunted kunai being thrown from a face very familiar to Sasuke.

"Shisui…" Shikamaru and Choji looked at Sasuke, whose attention was firmly fixed on the one throwing kunai.

"You know that guy, Sasuke?" Sasuke nodded.

"He's my cousin, and my nii-san's best friend. I wonder what he's doing here, and why he's throwing kunai at Naruto?" Shikamaru and Choji paid full attention as they caught sounds of running coming from behind them.

"Hey guys, what's the big deal! I thought you would wait for me!" Kiba and Akamaru ran up to the three, panting once they reached the group.

"We found Naruto. Sorry for not telling you where we went off to, but lookie here. Naruto is dodging kunai from Sasuke's cousin." Kiba looked up at Shikamaru, clearly wondering where that came from. Shikamaru pointed at Sasuke in explanation.

"Sasuke? Why the hell are you here?" The Uchiha turned around and glared at Kiba, but didn't really have a response. Admitting he was curious would be seen as weak by someone like Kiba, but being an ass would spoil the rather fun time he'd been having…

"We saw him wandering around and asked if he wanted to join us. When we left to find Naruto he came with us, and it's good he did! We wouldn't have known that was a Konoha ninja otherwise." Kiba looked at Sasuke and growled before Akamaru yipped at the Inuzuka and calmed him down.

"Either way, it's hard to tell what's going on, so we have to effectively split the two up without doing bodily harm to Sasuke's cousin, otherwise we'll be in trouble if he's a comrade. But if he's hostile and we give away our position, we'll all be in danger… This is too troublesome…" Shikamaru placed a cool hand on his forehead to calm down the raging headache. No one here knew any effective jutsu, except maybe Sasuke, and that was assuming he would help break up the fight.

"Here, I'm pretty good with kunai, my nii-san has helped me a lot. When he throws some, I'll arc my kunai just right and deflect them. Then the four of us can go in and help him out." Shikamaru turned to Sasuke. The plan wasn't perfect and was flawed in almost every definition of the word, but it just might work, at least initially. In worst case scenario, they'd only die. Nothing more.

Watching Shisui bring his arm up with another round of kunai and watching their friend tense, Sasuke threw three blunted kunai at Shisui's four. Seeing the projectiles on their way, Sasuke and Kiba jumped out, followed by the Nara and Akimichi heirs. Running, they saw Sasuke's aim hit true, if only a little early. Two of the kunai were knocked off course, and Naruto dodged the others easily.

As mentor and student turned towards the newcomers, Shisui laughed.

"They probably thought you were in danger. Wanna test something, Naruto?" Naruto nodded, and Shisui grabbed some shuriken this time.

"Let's pretend to be fighting in a real battle, I want to see what their plan is." Hiding a grin, master and apprentice nodded. Luckily for Shisui, even though he had told Naruto what was going on, they hadn't worked together nearly enough for Shunshin no Shisui's moves to be memorized or even understood. It was still technically training.

"Let's go then." Shisui threw kunai at a slightly more rapid pace, keeping Naruto on the move, shifting from left to right with each wave of kunai. The blond boy moved slightly closer to where his friends and classmate were approaching, but not enough to give away that he had seen them.

"Hah, I've got you this time, Naruto!" Shisui pulled out a kunai and twirled it around his finger, giving it a bit more power before hurling it.

"Kiba, block!" Before Naruto could dodge, his Inuzuka friend slashed from the left at the kunai with one of his own. While Kiba's action wasn't as cool as slicing it in two or using the wind to block kunai, it took the thing off course and further into the sky off to the right.

Not too far behind Kiba, Sasuke stopped slightly behind the Inuzuka once he saw that the kunai was deflected, and took a stance between his classmate and cousin. A few seconds later, Shikamaru and Choji ran onto the field, the former standing far enough away from the conflict to keep both Naruto and Shisui in his sight, the latter running and backing up Sasuke and Kiba.

"Is that you, Sasuke? Already doing the shinobi job and defending your classmates?" Sasuke nodded, at which point Naruto's sensei turned to Kiba and Choji, and then at Shikamaru who was observing from a few meters out of the fight.

"So lemme guess, you two and my baby cousin are the attack force, with the Nara out there acting as a strategist to help you with the plan?" Sasuke looked annoyed at the 'baby cousin' comment, while Choji and Kiba nodded, relaxing a little bit.

"A couple questions for you, if you don't mind." Shisui turned to the Nara and nodded, gesturing for him to speak.

"Firstly, how did you know my clan, secondly, just who are you?" Shisui laughed and vanished in a Shunshin, poking Shikamaru's pineapple ponytail, grinning when Shikamaru jumped back from the poke.

"This pineapple hair right here. No one other than the Nara has it, and you look a damn lot like Shikaku-sama and Ensui-san. You Shikaku's son or something?" Shikamaru nodded.

"And in answer to your second question, Naruto is my apprentice. We were doing some dodging work to hone his agility skills. He's got stamina like no other, so I figured now's the best time to get him up to speed, am I right?" Shisui awaited a response from the group, but found nothing but shocked stares except for Naruto.

"Why is Sasuke here though, other than the fact that Shisui is his cousin?" Shikamaru cleared his throat and spoke.

"That would be because he was talking about troublesome subjects with Choji and myself, and he's the only reason we managed to find you. We wanted to have a get together with Kiba, Choji, you, and me, but we didn't know where you'd be. Sasuke helped us find you." Naruto and Shisui looked at the stubborn Sasuke, Naruto with warm surprise and Shisui with amusement akin to one watching a little sibling do something silly. Which, for Sasuke, helping someone else was pretty damn close to silly.

"Well, since the four of you had the guts to take on an A-rank Jonin to get to little Naruto here," Said Shisui, ruffling Naruto's hair to his annoyance, "I guess I have to let you guys have your little get-together. We'll meet tomorrow, Naruto." The blond-haired Uzumaki nodded, a wide grin emerging on his face as he looked towards his friends and Sasuke. Walking off the field surrounded by those four, Naruto felt… Important. He felt wanted by a group of people who he enjoyed being with, and that feeling was so powerful. Naruto felt like his heart was a raging typhoon which would smash all opposition, a noble ruling over millions of subjects, a scion of nobility, a god of war.

…Okay, maybe the feeling wasn't that intense, but Naruto felt that new level of confidence like no other, and a desire to not be idle.

"You guys wanna help me with a prank?" Shikamaru gave a sideways glance at Naruto.

"You're really going to do a prank right after your sensei let you go early?" Naruto shrugged.

"Shisui-sensei told me I can't prank civilians because they can't fight back, unless they deserve it. He said if he found evidence he would give the strictest training imaginable or just not train me. He didn't mention ninja or guilty civilians though." This time Choji looked at Naruto.

"What makes civilians 'deserve it'? Isn't pranking wrong?" Naruto frowned this time.

"Some people are real pieces of work and I really don't know why. They put me down, whisper about me behind my back, and their eyes…" Naruto trailed off, eyes looking at his feet. Deciding not to prompt him further, Choji backed off of his question. Kiba spoke up next.

"So how about we nail the civilian? I really don't think we can get away with a ninja, especially since everyone but you is in a clan, Naruto." Kiba's statement had truth in Konoha anyhow, after all there was no current Uzumaki clan registered in Konoha, while the Inuzuka, Nara, Akimichi, and Uchiha clans were well known, the lattermost especially. It really didn't help that those clans were all extremely distinct in terms of physical appearances.

"Cool, you guys know Ami in our class?" Sasuke and Kiba's faces soured. Ami was not only loud enough to give Kiba splitting headaches, she also was a notorious stalker of Sasuke's. Their purple-haired classmate was also more than rude to Naruto on a few occasions, but given that those events were prior to the escapade to Naruto's apartment, no one batted an eye, including Roku-sensei.

"Well, her dad is one of the bigger asses in the village, and I was thinking we get a nice prank in on father and daughter." Kiba grinned and cracked his knuckles. He liked this plan.

"Shika, can you think up a strategy?"

"I'd have to see the troublesome place we're going to prank them. I presume it's their home?" Naruto nodded.

"So is Shikamaru the strategist of your group, Naruto?" Naruto nodded at Sasuke, who watched the dynamic with curiosity. Deciding now would be as good a time as any to expand his friend circle, Naruto involved the Uchiha in the conversation.

"You want to be part of the 'group', as you call it, Sasuke?" Sasuke looked at the expectant faces of Choji and Naruto, the wary expression of Kiba, and the neutral visage of Shikamaru.

"Sure, as long as you guys give me a say in what we do, I'm in. This sounds fun." Sasuke wanted to be _very_ invested in this project, the exterminat-err, _fixing_ of his stalkers was very high on his to-do list but didn't know how, and now the younger Uchiha brother could have a foolproof scheme for achieving it, even if he had to prank them one stalker at a time.

"Okay, now let's move towards Ami's house but quietly and without arousing suspicion. Our goal is to get as much intelligence as possible with as little trouble as we need. Be strategic, and don't make any risks we can afford to go without." Nodding, Shikamaru's four friends walked with him as Naruto led the way to Ami's house.

Thank goodness Shisui allowed Naruto to prank civilians guilty of something or other. Plus, it wasn't like Naruto would leave any evidence...

As the group marched into a civilian district, Naruto halted and pointed towards the house. It was two stories tall, had yellow paint on its walls and a bright purple roof. The house itself was weirdly proportioned, the second floor jutting out further than the first floor for one room, making a shadow under that room.

The house had several decently sized windows, primarily on the second floor, narrow but tall. The door was wooden and painted a sea green. A small garden was on the sides of the house, and Shikamaru could see several plants, and noted with curiosity that Sasuke's eyes seemed drawn to the tomatoes growing, much like a pirate to gold or a certain Sannin to hot springs (not that Shikamaru knew the latter situation, of course).

After a few minutes of careful analysis, Shikamaru led the group to the bench where he, Choji, and Sasuke talked about the exploits of days earlier. Stepping onto the ledge above the bench, Shikamaru walked back into a wooded area, only to find a small clearing with enough sunlight to light the area without being blinding. Perfect.

"So everyone, here's what I think. Since everyone has very specific strengths, I'm just gonna say what we need, and people can fill in the roles as need be.

"I suggest we break our squad into two troublesome groups, not including my unique role. The first Firstly, we need someone to bring the supplies to and from our base of operations. The person will need to have enough strength to carry the prank supplies quite a few times, and should not be overly distinct or infamous. Naruto, Sasuke, you two are out of the question for this role. The second role is the lookout, which I believe Kiba and Akamaru can do effectively. The lookout will keep an eye out for Ami or her parents, and will make sure the three of them and anyone else are out of her home. We don't want to be caught.

"The second group will be the ones to infiltrate the house and prank Ami's house, but that group has to be careful. Any permanent damage will be thoroughly investigated and will have criminal repercussions. The second group will have to be smart but also strong enough in will to do the pranking damage necessary without leaving a trail back to any of us, or anyone in general. You are the sword of the assault, you understand?" The four nodded, but then Sasuke raised one hand.

"And what is your unique role, Shikamaru?" Shikamaru looked at the Uchiha and at the entire group, before responding.

"As the strategist, I have to be the one to give out orders if anything goes wrong. If Kiba sees Ami or her parents coming home, if the supply person can't deliver supplies, if someone gets injured, or if the assault team has a complication. I have to plan out the situation and the what-ifs, and if our plan fails, the blame rests on my shoulders, as troublesome as that is." Shikamaru sighed and massaged his temples, knowing that the plan he'd have to make would inspire a headache.

"Give me an hour or two to make the plan. Anyone want to volunteer for roles?" Choji raised his hand.

"I'll be the supplier, I don't think I'm cut out for the pranking bit." Shikamaru nodded, his hope that Choji would take the supplier role fulfilled. After all, Shikamaru was sure that the overly kind Akimichi would come out of his shell eventually, but for now he was still just a child.

"Well, you already said Akamaru and I will be good lookouts. I wanted to do the pranking to get revenge on Ami for all of the ear damage she's given me, but I'm sure Sasuke and Naruto will give her hell." Naruto gave Kiba a thumbs up and a wide grin, while Sasuke nodded, one corner of his mouth twitching up.

"After all, if Naruto were to be the lookout, he'd get distracted by ramen or something." Laughing at the disgruntled look on the Uzumaki's face, Kiba walked over to the edge of the clearing and looked at the people passing nearby.

"And as for me, I'm going to get some little radios for the group. I think my oyaji has some, so I'll need to go home to get them. Sasuke, Naruto, plan out the actual pranking elements. Have Choji write down what you need and I'll look it over." Naruto and Sasuke nodded as Choji pulled out a pen and paper.

"Anyway, I'll be back soon. Ja." Naruto turned to Sasuke as they started planning.

"Okay, I think I have a plan. Here's what we should do…"

 _ **In Another Place…**_

"Oyaji, I need some microphones." Nara Shikaku turned around and raised an eyebrow at his son. In the brief staring contest between father and son, one could have heard a pin drop, but that could never happen. If one thing in their house was wrong, Yoshino would drop on the two of them like a storm. Too damn troublesome to let a pin drop.

"Microphones? The type used in missions, or civilian ones?"

"Shinobi ones, the kind with earpieces for long-range communication." Shikamaru looked at total ease, but Shikaku wasn't the Jonin commander for nothing. Shikamaru had something he was hiding, and if Shikaku knew his son (who was too much like himself to begin with), he would immediately withdraw his request should any scrutiny pop up.

"Sure, how many do you need?" Shikamaru's eyes gained a gleam of surprise, he obviously hadn't been thinking Shikaku would accept the request without question.

"I need five in good condition that are all linked up. I know it's troublesome, but you got that?" Shikaku nodded, walking into a closet a few meters away. Shikaku rummaged through boxes of shinobi tools, from the oddball inventions from that shack outside the village, prototypes and refinements of already existing tools, and other various things. Opening a box in the far back, Shikaku blew dust off of the lid and read 'Connected mics (x6)'. Making sure his face remained impassive, Nara Shikaku opened the box and found six mics, all seeming to be in good condition – no exposed wiring, no obvious twists, completely and totally unused.

Shikamaru eyed his father as he rummaged around before turning around with five mics in his hand, passing them off to the younger Nara.

"I don't know what you're doing with the mics, but don't be too troublesome. It would be a pain I if I was responsible for giving you tools you got in trouble with. And that would be before your mother got wind." As both Shika's in the Nara household shivered at the prospect, the tense silence washed away into a more comfortable one as Shikamaru sat down, got some chips for the group, and yawned.

"Mind if we play a round of Shogi, oyaji? I need to think on something." Slightly puzzled by his son's question, Shikaku nodded and grabbed a Shogi set, but stopped.

"I got a board of a western game that's a bit like Shogi, you want to give it a try with me?" Shikamaru nodded happily, it seemed that strategy games like Shogi were the only things that got him excited and involved with a situation.

Pulling out the pieces, Shikamaru analyzed the more limited pieces in this game than Shogi. Two rooks sat on the extreme flanks of the army, which had the ability of moving horizontally or vertically any number of spaces, much like a cavalry unit or an assault team.

The knights had the ability to attack at angles impossible with any other piece, but could not attack vertically, horizontally, or diagonally, but with their unique move can jump not only to awkward positions for enemies, but over enemy units.

The king was a weak piece who occupied the fourth space from the right, but the king's only goal, like in Shogi, was to be protected.

The queen however was quite the oddity, a piece that could move an infinite number of spaces vertically, horizontally, or diagonally. The queen could be a tank used to bash into poorly formed up enemy ranks, but the enemy's queen was also one of the most dangerous threats on the field.

Shikaku and Shikamaru's game lasted for an hour. Although Shikamaru had been soundly beaten by his father, there was still some merit in playing hard enough to make Nara Shikaku double check his moves for potential threats. By the end of the game, Shikamaru was left with a knight, pawn, and king in checkmate against Shikaku's army, which had survived with the exception of a knight, several pawns, and a bishop.

If these were the results in an actual battlefield, Shikamaru's army would be utterly annihilated, but the losses given to his father weren't exactly appealing prospects. In all honesty, were these the actual results of a battle, it would be too pyrrhic a victory unless either Shikamaru's theoretical realm couldn't replenish troops or Shikaku's realm had a wide variety of substitute special troops.

Losses of elite units or elite shinobi in battle could be catastrophic to a campaign, especially if those units were irreplaceable.

Not a bad loss, especially for Shikamaru's first time playing this western Shogi, or "chess" as Shikaku called it.

As the match ended, Shikamaru took a piece of paper and sketched out the area surrounding Ami's house. Taking several game pieces, Shikamaru placed the queen and a rook inside of the house.

The queen was a valuable piece with a wide variety of flavors, and it was the only one of its kind. The queen was definitely Naruto, because no had the sheer amount of experience with pranking Naruto did, and his logic-breaking abilities would come in useful.

The rook was a close second in terms of battle-effectiveness, being able to effectively act as either a battering ram, a stalwart defender for the king, a speedy striker on the battlefield, or any combination of the three. Sasuke was the rook because his raw skill in shinobi works made him close to Naruto in terms of usefulness in the operation, and when push came to shove he was the best of their group in flat-out combat if the academy's taijutsu sparring was any indication.

Outside, he placed a knight. This knight would definitely be Choji, because the supply lines had to be strong enough to not delay the attackers. His attack was in an indirect way that didn't deal with the risks of being inside of the house, as a support role more than a commando. And just as the knight was able to leap over soldiers in the battle or have eight different approaches to a move, Choji could give supplies from any angle that was safe and efficient enough, and could do so in a way that didn't scream "We're vandalizing!"

A bishop and a pawn were placed on either side of the map, much in line with the knight. Kiba would be the bishop. The bishop's nonlinear but long-range and highly versatile battle style fit his role; the Inuzuka clan's advanced senses would detect Ami or her family by smell and sound long before she was in sight, and the radios allowed for quick enough communication for new plans and actions to be developed and put into place.

Akamaru was the pawn because of the entire group, a small white puppy drew the least attention. Plus, Akamaru didn't have a mic or the ability to communicate with anyone outside of Kiba, so he wasn't exactly the most useful team player, and could act as a stalling force if necessary. Assuming Kiba didn't rip Shikamaru a new one for suggesting that.

On one of the corners far away (on another building roof, to be specific), was the king. While Shikamaru wasn't conceited in the slightest and knew that being a king was too damn troublesome for him, the lazy pineapple-haired Nara knew that he was effectively the king that needed protection. Should Shikamaru be discovered, the strategic arm would fall into shambles, and everyone else who would be used to Shikamaru's instructions would find themselves without a director.

Sighing, Shikamaru drew kanji for the various chess pieces on his paper and walked off, microphones and paper map in one hand, chips in the other. He had to have some type of bribe when they inevitably yelled at him for being late…

 _ **The Next Day...**_

"Ready?" Naruto looked up at Sasuke, who had a sour expression often worn by his clansmen.

"Do I really have to do this, Naruto?" Naruto nodded, a mischievous grin spreading across his features.

"Yeah you do. For what it's worth, I owe you one?" Naruto heard something that sounded a bit like "more like Kami owes me one", but Naruto let it slide. He couldn't miss this…

The class was waiting for its teacher, and the students were doing a variety of things. Shino was having his bugs form kanji in midair, Shikamaru was reading a book called "The Troublesome Guide to Chess", whatever that was… Choji was eating chips and looking around at his class with content and happiness. Kiba and Akamaru were grinning wickedly at Sasuke; Naruto had told the Inuzuka what would happen and Kiba was relishing every second of it.

Sasuke was uncomfortable, and with right reason to be. He was walking towards his dozens of ravenous fangirls with an air of resignation. Parting through them, Sasuke stood in the center and spoke the line he had rehearsed. No matter how he said it, the words came out so sad, but none of them noticed. It was their precious Sasuke-kun speaking after all.

"My nii-san Itachi has decided that he wants to betroth me to someone at a younger age. The marriage will be when I turn sixteen, and if he approves you, we will meet weekly until then. Any takers?" Naruto stifled his grin as he saw Sasuke's expression sour further when every girl in the class raised her hand and charged at Sasuke, except that weirdo Hinata and that sick girl… Yakami? Yokumo? Something like that.*

"Well nii-san said that anyone who wants to needs to meet both of us at training ground five an hour after school ends, there will be a table set up and everything, but you have to bring your parents or guardians, all of them. It is a legal document after all." Immediately many of those interested knew that their parents should approve, after all the political benefits were numerous.

The Uchiha clan was well connected, Sasuke's dad was the Police Chief and Uchiha clan head, Sasuke's brother was an up and coming ANBU whose academy graduation age was second only to the Yondaime Hokage's, not that the academy students knew most of that. What most of them did know, however, was that a marriage with the Uchiha clan would provide a great deal of political protection not only for the wife of Sasuke and her parents, but also extended kin and descendants.

"Class is starting, everyone get in your seats!" Roku-sensei stepped into the room as Sasuke sat beside Ami, his aura of sadness oblivious to the inner happiness of his target.

In later times, Shikamaru would reflect that this was a 'broken seduction', and he was more than correct. The seducer was utterly opposed to the idea of seducing the target for any reason, and the target was so utterly obsessed with the Uchiha that she only thought of her success despite overly blatant evidence for the contrary.

The academy that day was racked with tension in the class waiting to blow, namely from the ticking time bomb that was the Uchiha's "betrothal search".

"Ami, I saw you were one of the ones who was excited about the ceremony…" Ami nodded and chattered to Sasuke how much she wanted to be betrothed to him, while Sasuke attempted smiles and nodding in response which manifested in the form of grimaces and awkward jerking of the head. Further ahead in the class, Naruto and Kiba snuck peeks at the two, trying and failing to conceal the mirth and mischief on their faces.

Oh, the plan was in full swing now…

 _ **Later That Day**_

"Thank you, Itachi-san. We'll be sure to repay you for the trouble." Shikamaru and co. bowed to Itachi, still in his ANBU gear. With a soft smile, Sasuke's nii-san nodded and met Shikamaru in the eyes.

"I won't be the one doing the trouble though. I'll make two solid clones and have one of them henge into Sasuke. You aren't the only ones who have work to do." Shikamaru sighed in relief.

"Good, because paying someone back is troublesome." With a quiet laugh, Itachi shooed Shikamaru and Choji off, an Uchiha clan symbol proudly hanging from a banner hanging from a table. Sitting on the table were numerous forms of sorts, checklists. Itachi faked legal documents _very_ well.

Shikamaru and Choji walked towards Ami's house, talking about perfectly normal things; school, food, Shikamaru's "troublesome" mother, and so on. As they arrived, the two found Kiba and Naruto laughing at a black cloaked figure with a mask on his face.

"Look at Sasuke, ttebayo! He looks like such an idiot!" Ah, the sounds of two idiots roaring in mirth. How riveting.

"Ahahaha, I'm never letting you live this one down, Sasuke!" In the epicenter of the stupidity was the figure himself, head hanging in shame. Realizing this was their resident Uchiha, Shikamaru's mouth twitched upwards at the corners, and Choji chuckled. The Nara and Akimichi were subtle though. They were cooler that way.

"Ignoring Sasuke's rather attention-grabbing clothing, everything is going as I expected." Shikamaru could feel the twitch coming from Sasuke's eyebrow in annoyance. "So everyone, remember the chess pieces I said we all were?" The others nodded and counted themselves off.

"Naruto, Queen here ttebayo!"

"Sasuke, Rook."

"Choji, Knight of the Barbeque!"

"Kiba, holy Bishop with our resident Pawn-slash-Spy Master Akamaru here!"

"And I'm the King. Good, no one forget. Once we hook up our mics I'll send you off to your designated positions. Okay?" The four other humans and one puppy nodded happily.

Attaching a mic to himself, Shikamaru strolled into the same clearing where the sabotage was planned, and pulled out a small scroll. Unrolling it, Shikamaru nodded, satisfied at the same drawing he had used in the past, an aerial view of Ami's house and the surrounding area, and though it was very rough in design, the details and distances were mostly accurate, making it a legitimate map for certain times. Like now.

Placing the king in the clearing and the other pieces in front of Ami's house, Shikamaru started saying his plans.

"Bishop, send Pawn in front of the building three buildings to the right of Ami's house, it should be a store of some kind." Shikamaru looked at the map before deciding his next two moves.

"Roger, I'm sending Pawn/Spymaster on route now." Sighing, Shikamaru knew he'd have to put up with Kiba calling Akamaru 'spymaster', but if the plan was pulled off well it didn't matter.

"Bishop, move towards the Uchiha betrothal station. Use your advanced senses of smell and hearing to pinpoint the troublesome parents and daughter, only use eyesight if necessary." Kiba protested.

"Why not use eyesight? I'm not as good with those senses as most Inuzuka!"

"Because your eyesight is just as good as Ami and her parents', and I think they'll get suspicious if they find some boy from Ami's class actively stalking them." As Kiba sighed over the mic and said he'd do it, Shikamaru grabbed the Bishop and placed it halfway between the betrothal station and Ami's house – because why count the eggs before hatching?

"Knight, move towards the clearing where this entire thing was planned, I have most of the supplies nearby or between your position and mine. I'll have you bring supplies as needed, because Queen and Rook should already have some on them." Hearing noise of acceptance from his rotund knight friend, Shikamaru placed Choji's knight halfway between Ami's house and the king.

"Rook and Queen, make sure that no one is in the house before entering, then follow my instructions. We have to be very precise when entering. We don't want to have legal investigation, after all…" Hearing a "Sure-ttebayo!" from the queen and a grunt from the rook, Shikamaru moved the rook and queen to the rough doorway of Ami's house.

With a feeling of apprehension and a feeling of excitement just as strong, Shikamaru awaited the responses of his friends.

"Spymaster and Knight in position, Ami and her parents are in sight. Their entire family has purple hair, did you know that?" Feeling a sweatdrop inbound, Shikamaru turned his attention towards the clearing as he saw Choji walk in, sweaty but excited.

"Knight in position, King." Shikamaru gave a thumbs up to his longtime friend.

"Rook and Queen have been in position for like a year, ttebayo." Shikamaru nodded, and moved the knight beside the king, bishop on the outskirts of the training field where Itachi's shadow clones were working their magic, and Shikamaru rubbed his hands together. This was the time.

"Rook, Queen, Pawn, Bishop, Knight. Our time is now. We've planned for this, gotten materials for this, and if there's any better way to solidify our friendships, I don't know it. It may look like our plan is foolproof, but really the slightest chink can bring everything crashing down. Be smart and play safe, or it'll be troublesome." Cheers and acknowledgements from the other ends of the line greeted Shikamaru as his comrades mentally prepared themselves for success.

This was the time.

 ***Yes, I'm aware Yakumo is not sick, but would a six year old Naruto know her body is physically too weak to be a ninja?**

 **The prep is complete, the planning is done, and now Shikamaru's genius is ready for the world to see! To be fair, I plan to write the next chapter entirely around the sabotage, and it will be a decently long chapter at that, with plenty of action to test the group's prowess.**

 **No one caught onto the little reference I made (which has a little bit of foreshadowing) in chapters 1 and 2, and a little bit in chapter 3 as well.**

 **How did everyone like the chess pieces reference? I don't know Shogi, but Shikamaru's best fight in canon was the most devastating blow to the Akatsuki outside of Pein's invasion. He won using Shogi as a reference point, but I don't know how Shogi works, so I made a quick replacement in the form of chess; a game I'm much more familiar with.**

 **Give suggestions if you have some, if there's anything you liked and want to see more of, or something you disliked and want to see less of, I'd like to know that too. Guests can and are encouraged to be a part of the process too.**

 **~KoS.**


	4. Chapter 4: Let Slip the Dogs of War

**Hey all… I hope it's understandable I've been busy with something, and that's the reason I can't update… I started my summer job, and I work roughly 40 hour weeks, and usually wake up about three hours earlier than I usually do in the summertime. Not too fun. Aside from that, I've also had a memorial service to attend, religious duties, so on and so forth…**

 **Basically too much to update on time, BUT I managed to complete this chapter just in the nick of time.**

 **Dark Prime0: I've received a lot of positive feedback on the Hokage bit, and I gotta say that is my personal favorite scene so far in the story. I really feel like Sarutobi would be that type of grandfatherly figure to lightly push Naruto and his friends in a direction without appearing to pull any strings unless a genius like Shika figures it out. I feel that his childhood was ignored too, but honestly that gives me more to work with as a writer**

 **Also, Shhhhhhhhh. You might have tapped onto something that I may or may not have thought of. Oops. Some of them definitely will.**

 **Kronus96: Honestly, I feel that 1.5 of a Bijuu should not be able to subdue 6 of them, and I just feel that Kurama and Gyuuki wrecking all six Bijuu like it's nobody's business is Kishimoto's way of giving Naruto a clean road to Tobi. So many things are wrong with the fact that a fight lasts an entire night and somehow Naruto and Sasuke are able to use a mastered Rinnegan and Bijuu transformation by the end of it. Blame Kishi.**

 **I like writing Shikamaru, partly because I'm more of a tactician than a frontline fighter in my heart of hearts. Even so, Shika will struggle a bit this chapter. I hope Shisui makes it too, but I'm not exactly sure how far I want his relationship with Naruto to go. Yeah, Hiruzen is an oldie and there are definitely some ways I can go about Danzo happening, but wouldn't it be a** _ **little**_ **bit OOC if Naruto and his gang somehow suddenly found out about the Uchiha Massacre or the planned coup?**

 **I'm fond of Yakumo too, and you should feel that fondness blossom a little bit. I think I did her justice…**

"This is the start of our time, everyone. Move in!"

"Awesome, time to cut loose-ttebayo!" With that, Shikamaru moved the Queen to the door of the house, and frowned.

"Queen, don't jump in yet. We still need to know what supplies you need to sneak into the target's residence." A mutter of 'idiot' from Sasuke and a short bark of laughter from Kiba accompanied.

"Give me a few pins and I'll open the door. I just need about five minutes to break the lock." Looking up at Choji, Shikamaru saw that his chubby friend was already rummaging through a bag of small supplies.

"And gimme some paint balloons, Choji. I want to have some fun with the outside of her house!" Shikamaru immediately spoke up at that suggestion.

"Nar-er Queen, the goal is to not be caught. If the town prankster is seen throwing paint balloons at someone's home the Konoha Police Department will get involved. Save the balloons for when the lock is picked and the door is firmly shut." Out of the corner of his eye, Shikamaru saw Choji putting balloons in the backpack and pins in his pocket. Looks like three of their members knew how to take the initiative without being idiotic.

"Alright, Knight is on his way over, hold down the fort as much as you can, Rook. It's up to you to make sure that Knight can get his materials to you and Queen." Hearing a 'hn' in response, Shikamaru moved the rook on his board on the street above Ami's house and the knight between the King and Rook.

"Knight has arrived, we received the supplies, King. Give us some time to pick the lock." Shikamaru moved the knight and rook beside the queen inside of Ami's house, and laid back a little, savoring the sounds of Sasuke furiously working to pick the lock. At least for the time being, things seemed less troublesome.

"King, we've got a problem. The purple-haired trio are almost at the front of the line, what should I do?" Shikamaru closed his eyes and remembered telling Itachi to make the line as troublesome and tedious as he could, meaning that if Kiba could get one thing out of place…

The young genius's mind whirred and spun at high speeds, going through everything from Kiba's position to the little he knew about Ami and her parents. No obvious allergies, not a huge number of extracurricular activities, average scores… It seemed that the only thing that could work would be something either utterly ingenious or idiotic and lucky.

"Bishop, how far can you throw a rock?" A slightly stunned silence followed the question, but Bishop responded soon enough.

"Not far enough to hit them from here, why?" Shikamaru sighed and looked at the map he drew. Somehow, they would have to either draw Ami's family within range or move Kiba up without being seen, both of which were awkward to pull off with no lines of communication to shelter the espionage.

"Naruto's sensei is speaking to Itachi's clone. Something's going on." Immediately breath was held on all ends, and the lock picking came to a close. Unbeknownst to anyone, each had his own worst case scenario play out in his head.

"Shisui? He's Itachi's friend, but he's also with the Uchiha clan. You sure you saw Shisui there?" An affirmative growl from Kiba was all they needed. From the silence on Kiba's line, one could hear sounds of… screaming? After a few seconds, the sounds of locks being picked continued.

"Damn, even over in cover they're so loud! That Ino girl is fighting with Ami. Something about Ami's family cutting hers." Shikamaru frowned.

"But they're in a long but clearly defined line, right?" Kiba grunted again.

"Then how the hell could they cut or be accused of cutting in such a clearly defined…" Kiba shrugged.

"Whatever it is, Ino's parents believe it, so maybe something did happen without me seeing it, which is kinda odd considering I've been watching them the whole time." So something was happening over on Kiba's end. Somehow, in a clear line, two families got in a fuss, one accusing the other of cutting? But they seemed to believe it? How could they remember a cutting that never happened?

"Ami's dad and Ino's are walking away, they look really angry." Would they fight?

"Looks like they're shouting at one another, Naruto's sensei is laughing at it." Naruto snorted.

"Of course Shisui-sensei would enjoy getting a few laughs out of them. He's worse than Kasaru-no-baka." Not bothering to ask the troublesome question of who this 'Kasaru' was, Shikamaru focused in.

"Could Shisui use a genjutsu on Ino's father?" Choji voiced his opinion.

"Well, Yamanaka-sama is a clan head, leader of Konoha's Torture and Interrogation, plus a master of the mind. Do conventional genjutsu even work on a guy like that?" With no answers as to what could have happened, the group continued until Kiba laughed.

"Guys, now Sakura's dad is getting involved!" Immediately Naruto's sadness was felt through the silence on his radio. Ever since starting the academy, the young Uzumaki had fallen in love with his 'Sakura-chan', despite her being the equivalent of a bubblegum-haired Ami.

"Sakura's dad, what's he doing?" Kiba squinted more closely and looked at Haruno Kizashi.

"He's siding with Ino's dad, and him and Ami's dad are getting into a shoving match. They could get – Oh sweet! Sakura's dad gave Ami's dad an uppercut, they're getting into a brawl!" Listening to Kiba's boisterous laughter over the communication lines, everyone laughed or chuckled. Shikamaru was more hopeful Sakura's dad would do some damage, after all every single occasion that would stall Ami's family was well appreciated, rewarded or not.

Hopefully Haruno Kizashi wouldn't do too much damage. If something went wrong and Ami's family arrived home to a thoroughly messed up house with an injury or death… They wouldn't be vigilante prankers, they would just be asses.

With that and Kiba's occasional commentary about their brawl, a comfortable silence settled over the radio lines. No worries yet, just unwinding and every once in a while asking a bored question, like…

"Rook, how are you-" **CLICK**.

"It's open, with no damage to the doorknob. What's next?" Well, there was Sasuke. Straight to the point as always…

"Rook and Queen, ensure no one is in the house, and if so, move in!" The two immediately did so, entering and listening to the utter silence that filled the house, as if the building was steeling itself for the two walking disasters approaching.

"No one's here."

"Go wild." Grabbing a variety of tools, Naruto and Sasuke decided to give the kitchen a remake over the next few minutes.

If one were to look on the left side of the room, one would find a nice wooden table with orange and green paint dousing it, while one whiff of the scent surrounding it would indicate an overuse of stink bombs.

Closer to the center, an island table sat in the middle, once with nice wooden stools and a nice, clean table top. This island was now covered in hot, bubbly maple syrup with vinegar doused over the seats. Amidst the sea of syrup, raw eggs and yolks sat like less than appealing buoys. The seats had a glue that reacted with pressure, meaning that it would not be active until someone sat on it, placed a hand on it, or something of the like.

Each cabinet and cupboard was given a different new symbol, many of which Sasuke didn't know about and didn't want to know where those symbols came from, but the young Uchiha recalled a couple words on the cupboards from the time his father had given Nii-san a talk about bodily changes associated with growing up.

Carefully sealing that can of worms inside his repressed memory file, Sasuke threw numerous paint balloons into the air and followed them up with nails and screws which nailed the balloons and found themselves firmly in walls. Nii-san would be so proud if he wasn't a law-abiding citizen.

Few words could describe the mess on the kitchen floor. Naruto had started by dumping a layer of flour about half an inch thick over the entire floor, then he mixed together what was possibly the foulest concoction Sasuke had ever seen. Spices, raw eggs, pickle juice, vinegar, a douse of baking soda, ketchup, food coloring, the list of materials Naruto took from Ami's fridge to make this toxic substance continued to grow in a large metal bowl, until the Uzumaki seemed finished.

"Sasuke, once I drop this thing we gotta shut the doors, or we'll be sick ttebayo!" Not needing to be told twice, Sasuke departed then and there, as he watched Naruto pour the massive bowl's worth of, er, goop onto the floor, as the substance with traces of light green, black, and brown cascaded over the flour with the consistency of molten lava. The only difference was the factor of disgust, Sasuke had no doubt that Naruto's creation had more than enough ways to kill people.

Closing the door behind him, Naruto pulled out a flower of all things and sniffed it, the green that had been creeping onto his face retreating as an expression of Nirvana overtook his face, before offering it to Sasuke.

"Gotta get a fresh smell in our noses so we don't puke." For once, Sasuke was grateful Naruto had pranked so much in his lifetime. Who else would think to bring a scent to cancel out the mess in the other room?

"I'll take out their living room, you do their parents' bedroom. Choji, we need more balloons ttebayo. But don't come to the front, you won't like the smell coming out of the house." Hearing Choji's affirmative, Naruto ran up the stairs as Sasuke ran and took a right, finding a room with a nice couch, a radio, and a bookshelf in the back. Perfect.

Looking at the rather limited supplies in his hand, the Uchiha threw his remaining balloons over the couch and radio, and the stink bombs found their marks on the various books, new and old. With a snicker, Sasuke saw Choji running near his position with one hand over his nose, the other holding a box. Opening a window, Sasuke called out to Choji and let the rotund Akimichi move some supplies to him.

"More balloons, some flour, ninja wire, rope, and some other stuff too. Have fun!" Giving brief thanks, Sasuke followed up the paint with flour galore, and briefly strung together some trip traps that would give anyone a fresh cyan-colored makeover. This room was complete, it was time to help Naruto.

Sasuke blinked at the sight of Ami's parents' room. A large and, admittedly quite beautiful bed occupied the center of the room, with soft white colored spreading. To some, people would see the cost of this bed. To others, one would see the epitome of cleanliness and order for a master bedroom.

For Sasuke and Naruto, it was a canvas. A beautiful, wide, open-world canvas.

"Now Sasuke, this one is so mine-ttebayo!" Sasuke shook his head.

"Ami is my fangirl, I deserve to mess up her parents' room!"

"No, I want it!"

"No, its my turn!"

While the two squabbled over who would wreck Ami's parents' bedroom, a much greater battle was taking place in the Land of Rivers…

"Senpou: Goemon!" A stream of oil, wind, and fire mixed, creating a hellish river of lava for any who were in its path. Fortunately, or perhaps unfortunately, the target merely laughed and jumped in the air, already spewing a huge wave of snakes.

"Kukukuku, you won't get me that easily, Jiraiya. Is that all your sage mode comes up to?" Laughing, Orochimaru observed the changes his teammate had undergone with nonchalance.

A mane of white hair was over the top of a man in his early fourties, wildly circling around a man wearing a brown kimono top with a red haori over it and fishnet armor under it. He wore geta sandals on his feet, and his shoulders each had a toad on top; a purple-cloak wearing one with rollers in her hair on one shoulder, and a brown-cloaked one with bushy white eyebrows, a Mohawk, and a goatee, on the other shoulder.

"Jiraiya-chan, you haven't used Sage Mode for a long time, are you sure you're up to this?" The man nodded, silencing the toad speaking to him.

Jiraiya the Gama Sennin stared at his best friend, or arch nemesis depending on the angle. Two bangs of his white mane framed the man's face, while a small beard sat below his chin. A horned forehead protector with the kanji for oil sat upon his forehead. Beneath it, red pigment surrounded his eyes, with two lines descending from each eye, eyes with horizontal bars as pupils. One line from each went down his face, vanishing in his beard, while the other line on each side came close to his nose but abruptly turned away from his face.

"Orochimaru, you will not get away this time!" Jiraiya's target, Orochimaru, threw his head back and laughed at his perverted teammate. Sighing in resignation, Jiraiya blurred out of sight, one sandaled foot kicking Orochimaru in the shoulder with exemplary force, such that the snake-faced Sannin only had time to raise his eyebrows in shock before he went flying.

"My my, Jiraiya. You've certainly become stronger since our fight with Sanshouo no Hanzo, haven't you?" Jiraiya responded by spewing another wave of burning oil.

"Orochimaru, if you don't take me seriously, you will regret it!" Orochimaru raised an eyebrow at Jiraiya, silently challenging the Sennin.

"Oh? Even if you have enhanced taijutsu and your grandparents with you, I seriously doubt you can do anything of worth, Jiraiya…" In response, the toad on Jiraiya's right shoulder shot highly pressurized water at the S-ranked Missing-nin, and Orochimaru's eyes widened further as he saw the water could slice through the ground quite deeply with little trouble. That could be problematic.

Jiraiya then spewed out fire as the toad on his right sent out wind, and the two combined to make a large flaming ball of death. Orochimaru in response flashed through handsigns.

"Doton: Doryuheki!" Orochimaru made sure to place a great deal of chakra in this jutsu, making the wall large and thick, perfect for dealing with it. Orochimaru frowned; why was the wall a dripping goey mess instead of earth? Looking down, Orochimaru saw a swamp beneath him.

"Simultaneous jutsu? What are you doing, Jiraiya?" Hearing a laughing sound from behind him, Orochimaru turned around to see another Jiraiya. A clone, it had to be. Using chakra to push himself out of the ground, Orochimaru leapt at the clone, neck extending as he coughed up a kunai from his throat. Putting the kunai in his mouth, he slashed through the clone, watching with satisfaction as it popped into smoke. Remembering the bomb of fire behind him, Orochimaru bit down into the ground and shrunk his neck back to its normal size, rapidly bringing his body back to his head.

Had he waited longer, his body would have been burnt to a crisp as Jiraiya's Sage Mode enhanced fire jutsu smashed through the weakened Doryuheki.

"Doton: Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Orochimaru created a series of clones from the earth around him, having them charge from the flanks of the fireball.

Jiraiya centered his weight as he saw clones approach him from all sides, and summoned four of his own.

"Jiraiya-chan, if you make any more clones you'll lose too much Sennin Modo chakra, conserve what you have!" Jiraiya nodded and let his clones charge. Orochimaru's were much more numerous, so they split into squads and challenged Jiraiya's Sennin Modo enhanced clones with superior numbers. The results were spectacularly one-sided, with limb and neck extensions plus the relative weakness of Jiraiya's clones making the fight ended.

"Oh Jiraiya, what are you doing? Separating your chakra into smaller groups only makes you and them so much weaker…" Jiraiya closed his eyes and felt a bead of sweat trickle down his face, a grin on his face.

"What a shame, Orochimaru. Seems you've forgotten something about me…" The original Orochimaru stepped into the scene behind his clones, who surrounded Jiraiya.

"Oh? I don't think I have… All I need to know is that you're still an idiot." Jiraiya laughed.

"I'm known as the village's madness for a reason, Orochimaru!" Crouching on four legs, Jiraiya's hair grew at a rapid rate, and Orochimaru's eyes widened, he remembered this jutsu…

"Senpou: Kebari SENBON!" Hair shot in massive quantities from Jiraiya, skewering all of the clones.

"And unlike my previous jutsu, this one is limitless thanks to these 'grandparents', as you called them!" True to his words, Shima and Fukasaku were grinning as they gathered nature chakra and sent it into Jiraiya's hair roots. Within a few seconds, the original Orochimaru was more akin to a porcupine than a snake, never mind a human of any kind.

Jiraiya blinked as he felt his exhaustion catch up to him, making itself known by a pounding headache and a lightheadedness, with a couple of white spots in his vision to boot. At least, Jiraiya thought, Orochimaru had been dealt with. Strangely though, it wasn't like Orochimaru to be killed by senbon needles of all things. Jiraiya had thought that he'd need an exceptional sage jutsu to do him in, but then again, Kebari Senbon was _quite_ a powerful move. Hearing noise in the direction of Orochimaru's body, Jiraiya's eyes widened as he saw 'Orochimaru' desolve into mud. He had been fighting a clone? Jiraiya then felt a pain going from his left side to his right shoulder from behind.

When had Orochimaru substituted?

"Kukukuku, it seems you're still as idiotic as ever. Who would have thought, a Sage, member of the Denetsu no Sannin, and teacher of Yondaime Hokage would be stopped with a mere kunai and substitution?" Orochimaru laughed as he walked off.

"However, I know you'd not go down without a fight, and I do have a schedule to keep. This shall be settled… At another time. Don't get too much weaker, or else even your toads and sage jutsu will fall short of me. Anyhow, the next generation awaits, ja ne." With that, Orochimaru Shunshin'd out of sight, and Fukasaku sighed, already sending nature chakra to heal Jiraiya's wound.

"You've gotten rusty since the last war, Jiraiya-chan. You need to start training again!" Groaning in pain, Jiraiya nodded. That defeat was simply humiliating.

"I wonder what Orochimaru meant by the next generation? I thought his student was in the leaf!" Jiraiya nodded.

"Little Anko-chan is perfectly loyal to Konoha, which means that she isn't the next generation he's speaking of. Does he have a new apprentice?" Fukasaku 'hmm'd and looked off into the direction he vanished to.

"Isn't Takigakure in this region, Jiraiya-chan?" Jiraiya's mind started whirring. Taki's current leader, Shido, was a trustworthy ally, as far as alliances went in the Shinobi world. Taki shinobi were often sent to aid Konoha in large-scale operations, like Minato's campaign against Iwa. In return, Konoha provided supplies like food, textiles, and clean water, which were often unavailable in the name of protecting the village's location.

It also helped that Sarutobi-sensei knew the location of the village and honored a pledge to keep its location secret for good, something that even other veteran shinobi like Danzo hadn't been able to find.

But it seemed Orochimaru knew the location or had a mole in the village, which, Jiraiya thought, really shouldn't have been much of a surprise, given the fact that he himself knew its location and was also keeping the oath.

"Boss, Ma'am, I'm sorry for dragging you all the way out here for an embarrassing defeat. I'll be stronger by the time we meet again." Shima dispelled, but Fukasaku held on for a little while longer.

"What exactly do you intend to do from here, Jiraiya-chan?" Jiraiya thought for a couple seconds, Sage Mode wearing off, as his features returned to normality.

"Go to Taki to check the state of affairs there, but once I'm done I'll train 'till I reach my peak again. Maybe I'll write a book and check up on Konoha a few times too." It went without saying that Jiraiya would also maintain the extensive spy network he created – a powerful entity which had saved Konoha's tail end more than a few times, in war and diplomacy.

"Well, it's time to get moving. Thanks for healing me, Boss."

"Ja ne, Jiraiya-chan." The second toad dispelled, and Jiraiya stood up, stretching his legs. He needed to get to Taki as fast as possible, but he certainly needed rest first…

Not for the first time, Jiraiya wondered about his godson, feeling a twinge of guilt about not being there for the kid. It was bad enough Naruto had no parents, but Konoha's economy wasn't in the booming phase it used to be, and the young Uzumaki was a village pariah if the last report was accurate. Staring into the bright day before he had to move, he hoped Naruto was having more fun than he was…

"I think we work better as a team, ttebayo." Naruto and Sasuke looked at the mess they had created. Instead of restraining themselves like they had had on other rooms, the two had decided to cause as much damage as possible, which accounted for how the mattress had been sliced into ten pieces, the bookshelves filled with vomit-smelling goop, the walls dyed red and orange, and the room's clean and orderly feel was changed to a feeling of well… Two six year olds hell-bent on pranking. Not an utterly bad thing.

"Let's do the hallways and bathrooms before we get to Ami's room, ne Sasuke? The Uchiha nodded and ran downstairs, getting more materials from Choji, who looked to be tiring.

"I think this is the last of the supplies, Rook. I'm gonna go back with Shika-er-King for now. Tell me if you need anything else." Sasuke gave a thumbs up and humble thanks to Choji, and then returned to where Naruto was painting obscene words and symbols on the hallways.

"Shika, Choji, we have a problem. Ami's family has just talked with Itachi and been denied. They're starting to return home." Shikamaru gasped and cursed.

"That was faster than I thought. Bishop, move a few hundred meters outside of their position and await further instruction." Hearing an acceptance from Kiba, Shikamaru moved the Bishop to the street where he predicted Ami's family and Kiba would meet up, roughly the middle ground in between Ami's house and the location of Itachi's diversion.

"Also Shika, I'm near your position. I smell four people, who is with you?" Shikamaru looked around, it was only Choji…

"Just me and Knight, what do you mean there's four?"

"I smell two other scents, one's kinda like you, Shi-er-King. The other feels a little bit familiar, but I can't place my finger on it…" Shikamaru looked around the clearing. All of the supplies were delivered by Choji, so it was just the two of them and an empty field. But if Kiba smelled someone a bit like Shikamaru himself, then that meant…

"Troublesome! Choji, we have to hide!" Following his friend's lead, Choji and Shikamaru moved towards bushes on the edge of the clearing and hunkered down in preparation for a long hiding session. Listening in strict silence, the two friends sat with wide eyes and great fear as they heard a slight whistling.

"Ami and her parents have passed the midway point, they're getting closer to their home every second!" Shikamaru's eyes widened and he seriously wanted to give a tactical analysis, but with people so close by… It seemed the King was stalled.

"Kiba, if people are around I can't give out the plans without putting us in danger, you'll have to do it on your own." Shikamaru's whisper was harsher than normal and very quick, and it was clear he felt himself and likely Choji in a certain degree of danger.

"Shikamaru, what do you mean? How am I supposed to make my own strategy?" There was no response from the other line. It seemed that Shikamaru and Choji had turned off their lines for the time being.

Sighing, Kiba looked at Ami's family coming closer to their home. He would have to do what he could.

"Oi Sasuke, how much do you want to bet she has a shrine of you in her room?" Sasuke's expression soured.

"I really don't want to think about that, but at the same time I know she probably has one." Laughing, Naruto opened the door to Ami's room. Purple paint occupied the walls of the room. Paintings of Ami's own creation lined the walls, and Sasuke noted that despite the fact that several paintings were of him, the majority were of scenery, and all were painted with talent.

"Naruto, you mind if we spare a painting for me to take home?" Naruto nodded, paintbrush and orange paint can already in hand.

"It's a shame she's so obsessed with you. Imagine what would happen if she took painting requests from the class?" Sasuke snorted.

"As if you'd have her draw anything worthwhile. All you care about is ramen, pranking, and the Yondaime Hokage!" Naruto flushed with anger.

"Hey, Yondaime-sama is the village's hero! Imagine how cool things would be if he were still around!" Naruto paused. "Maybe he would help me find my parents. The people at the orphanage always told me that my parents dumped me there and left…" Sasuke's hair shadowed his eyes for a second. He didn't know what he would do if his parents had done something so cruel. Even though his father was cold and clearly favored nii-san, Sasuke knew that the clan head of the Uchiha loved him too. Okaa-san didn't lie after all, she never had.

The two looked at the paintings for a bit longer before Naruto opened an out-of-place looking closet, and as Sasuke continued looking around the room in a mix of horror and impression, laughing was heard throughout the room. Turning around, Sasuke saw Naruto rolling around on the ground, tears coming out of his eyes as he laughed in a somewhat-euphoric state. Looking at where Naruto was pointing, Sasuke's eyes bugged out and his face took a somewhat fish-like look.

The Sasuke shrine they had joked about? More realistic than they had thought. Made of aluminum, a fairly large cardboard box, and spray-painted with gold, a shrine to Uchiha Sasuke sat in the closet, and judging by the lack of dust on it and the decent amount of dust in the rest of the closet, the damn thing was worshipped. Frequently. Luckily for them, it also had wheels and could be pushed with relative ease.

"Sasuke, I am so sorry for you ttebayo. Words can't express!" Sasuke glared at Naruto as they rolled the shrine out of the closet and looked at it in more detail. The cardboard box had the kanji for 'Uchiha Sasuke-dono, Kami-sama of all hotness' in red paint, as the Sasuke made of aluminum, though created with a very noticeable lack of skill that was present in the paintings, was very distinct through – of all things – his duck-assed-er, _unique_ hairstyle.

An arrogant grin played on the Uchiha-esque abomination as it stood with a sword in the air held in victory as one foot stood on the backs of his enemies, which Naruto noted were the even more poorly constructed faces of himself, Kiba, and what could be that guy with sunglasses, er… He would remember the guy's name at another time. Sasuke seemed to be in some type of shock as Naruto noted his face hadn't shifted at all, save for the twitching in his left eyebrow. Unfortunately for them, time moved on.

"Naruto, Sasuke, you two have a problem approaching." The two addressed quickly stopped arguing and listened. "Ami and her parents are coming home, and Shikamaru and Choji are hiding from a possible threat to our plan. You two have to get out as soon as you can." Naruto and Sasuke looked at each other and abandoned any thoughts of getting revenge on Ami's room.

"Sasuke, you're stronger than me right now." Sasuke nodded as if it were a given, and affirmed Naruto's statement. "I need you to take the paint and other stuff for the time being. I'm better at hiding and staying quiet, and 'cause you're stronger, I can trust you'll get them out of here and hide yourself until I can get out." The Uchiha looked in shock at Naruto's proposition.

"But that means abandoning this place to you, and we know that Ami hates you! Imagine what she'll do if she finds you! If she finds me, she'll consider it a blessing and I'll have a chance of getting out of it alive!" Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"And what will happen when your clan finds out, ttebayo? I met your dad the police chief once, and he's the last person I'd want to see after doing something as big as this. It would be a million times worse if I was his son." Sasuke sighed in defeat, before giving the final term.

"Fine, but I'm helping you find a good place to hide for a while, and I owe you one." Naruto gave a face-splitting grin and a thumbs up to Sasuke, as the two looked around for good spots to hide.

"You two, Ami's meeting up with a lot of girls and they're chattering for a bit. You might not only have Ami to deal with, but a large number of our classmates." Naruto blinked at Kiba's new intel before responding.

"Who, ttebayo?"

"Uh, Ami herself," Well that was a given… "Ino, Sakura," Sasuke's face soured at both names and Naruto's gained a slight red flush at the latter, "Fuki, Kasumi, and it looks like they're dragging that Yakumo girl with them, she looks really uncomfortable and awkward." In Sasuke, Naruto, and Kiba's heads, similar thoughts were racing through.

The maroon, spiky-haired, prickly-looking Fuki and the tall, afro-haired Kasumi were Ami's subordinates, so it was a given that they would be coming along. Yakumo's place in the group was very much stated to be awkward and uncomfortable, so it was presumed whatever they were doing was not something she wanted in on. However, Ino and Sakura were not Ami's friends, and the purple-haired girl and her two cronies often fought with the two. What were they doing so buddy-buddy?

"My nee-san Hana said that girls bond over things they have in common, can you think of anything Ino, Sakura, and Ami would like? Naruto deadpanned at his Uchiha comrade. Things they had in common, eh?

"Kami-sama hates me. It's clear." Sasuke groaned, face pale and hand on his forehead.

"C'mon Sasuke, as long as they're stalling that's more time for us to get out of here!" The rook's face brightened as he and Naruto started dropping the paint cans and such out of the window that faced behind Ami's house's front door.

"Kiba, can you by chance meet us behind Ami's house? We have a way to get the supplies out of sight but we really need another hand."

"Yeah, the six of them are moving ahead of Ami's parents, so I'm moving already. I'll just pick up the pace with my clan's speed training!" Hearing affirmation, the two kept going with renewed fervor. A teammate, compatriot, and friend on the way to help did wonders for morale. Once the two finished dropping the paint and other supplies, Sasuke pulled out the rope he had gotten from Choji. It seemed that though Shikamaru was stalled, his foresight had won the day.

"Thank you, Shikamaru." Naruto murmured as he helped lower Sasuke using the rope. Several times throughout the lowering there were very close calls, but at the end Sasuke was down with the rest of the supplies, and there was very little which could be used to prove this as their way of exit.

"Naruto, get out of their in one piece, would you?" Hearing Naruto chuckle and mention something about the shrine, Sasuke picked up the remaining ones and started walking with them all attached to him in various ways, making for an awkward and labored walk. At least Kiba could help bear the load, and Sasuke could probably convince the headstrong Inuzuka to carry most of the supplies as some kind of strength bet.

Meanwhile in Ami's house, Naruto looked at the statue of Sasuke, more specifically the decently sized cardboard box. While Naruto wasn't totally puny, he was still remarkably small for his age, and could very well fit inside of the box, if uncomfortably. Quickly opening one of the box's sides, Naruto started making his way inside.

Placing himself such that he could turn his head and look from four of the eight corners of the box, Naruto kept himself breathing in and out to keep a constant heart rate. One of the things he had learned from his pranking was that for some reason or another, a terribly frightened enemy would be easier to find.

"EWWWWW!" And there were his adversaries. Hearing wails and screams of disgust and shock at the mess in the kitchen, paint in all of the rooms, Naruto grinned and chuckled lightly. Before long, Naruto heard the light pitter-patters of his classmates walking up the stairs and into her room. Luckily, Naruto had placed the shrine back inside of the closet, so it wasn't totally suspicious.

"At least your room is okay, Ami-chan. Who would do this to you though?" Kasumi spoke. She was usually mean to Naruto and enjoyed towering over him, and was Ami's right hand girl. She was smart, cruel, and knew how to use words to her advantage.

"We'd better deal with whoever did this to your place, Ami-chan!" That was Fuki. Naruto disliked her a lot, partly because Fuki herself strongly disliked Naruto for having the same hairstyle as her, but the young Uzumaki had no reason to copy her, and no desire to either. Fuki was Ami's metaphorical left hand, the one that dealt severe attacks without any consideration of consequences.

"You said you had a shrine to Sasuke-kun around here, let's make sure that isn't tampered with!" That was Yamanaka Ino, a friend of Naruto's precious Sakura-chan. Naruto loved being with Sakura, but he couldn't approach Sakura in a remotely calm way partly because of Ino, who loved to gossip and judge everyone around her like she was a princess, although that might be because her father Inoichi referred to her as such in all places. Honestly, although some boys in his class liked Ino, Naruto didn't really get why.

Yakumo was okay. She was decently shy and didn't have a lot of friends, and Naruto had never heard of the Kurama clan, but she wasn't a Sasuke worshipper, was kind to Naruto, and didn't seem to have a mean bone in her body. That being said, the young Uzumaki had only known Yakumo for so long and only during the school day, her habits outside of the classroom were unknown to him.

"Yakumo, we're going to show you our worship, are you ready to see the greatness of our Sasuke-sama?" Ami's speech, from what Naruto could see, made Yakumo turn a sickly shade of green as the Kurama girl vehemently shook her head and chose to stand towards the back of the statue.

"Remember everyone, no matter what happens, we must work together to ensure Sasuke-sama's good will. We cannot lose focus. Even if the house were to burn down now, we must make sure that our prayers go through!"

As Yakumo found out after watching her classmates with a look of disgust, even though Ami, her cronies, Sakura, and Ino were very different, they all kept a ritualistic religious form of worship, kowtowing to the Sasuke statue and repeating mantras.

As Naruto saw this, he shivered in disgust, and a little bit of noise escaped. Needless to say, five of the other occupants of the room didn't notice in the slightest. One Kurama heiress did.

As Yakumo crouched down near the corner of the statue, she allowed one large brown eye to gaze through the corner of the cardboard, and despite the lack of light, it was clear from the shock of her expression that she could see the now mortified blue eyes and sun-kissed hair. Backing up a little bit, Yakumo blinked several times before piecing the situation together.

The Kurama heiress had seen Ami's house. Yakumo was very much aware of Naruto's reputation as a master prankster, and had seen the results of Ami and her gang's bullying habits. Even so, this seemed… refined. Somehow, Yakumo couldn't see Naruto doing that much damage on his own, in the relatively limited time that had passed from school ending. He must have had someone help him out, even if that was just to get the sheer number of supplies she had seen utilized from room to room. It also helped that the rooms looked different in their pranking, and Yakumo thought she saw the workings of at least two styles of pranking. One looked like the indiscriminate work was forced, while the other seemed more free-flowing. However, Naruto really didn't look like he would answer her if she questioned him, especially in his current predicament…

…However, she would have plenty of time to question the Uzumaki if he owed her one.

"Ami-san, your parents are calling for us." The five girls in the room were broken out of their trances and ran out of the door, Fuki muttering something about wanting to continue with her ritual. Once she had seen the five were out of the way, Yakumo crouched down at Naruto's position and gave the box a deadpan stare.

"What are you doing, Naruto?" The Uzumaki knew his game was up, so he opened the cardboard a little bit so he could poke his head through.

"You're going to turn me in to Ami, aren't you?" Yakumo shook her head, the green that had momentarily ebbed away returning.

"I really don't want to know what she'll do if she finds you in her idol's statue. Plus, I have a question, and I have the option of telling Ami and her parents who one of the pranksters is if you don't comply." Naruto started sweating.

"So I have two questions, but you only have to answer one." Naruto felt his heart rate slow a little. He could work with this.

"So, my first question is; Who helped you mess up this house? My second question is; How many people, including you, messed up this house?" Naruto's gears turned. If he went with the first option, one of his friends would be ratted out, and Naruto really didn't like that option. If he went with the second, Yakumo would simply have to look around and see who gathered around who, and eventually work out some, if not all of the people responsible.

Also, why did she want this information? A conspiracy? Would Yakumo report to the Hokage, or Shisui-sensei, or the parents of his friends? What would she do?

Hearing sounds from below, Naruto deduced that Ami and her parents were talking, meaning they would find out that Yakumo had lied.

"Five. Five people including me." Ami's eyebrow rose as she lifted Ami's window high.

"Your secret is safe with me. You might want to leave, before it's too late." Nodding in gratefulness and giving the amused Kurama heiress a tear-filled hug in relief, the Uzumaki jumped out of the window, and stalked off into the unknown.

"I'm out of that place, ttebayo. I'm never going back!" Naruto ran off through the streets to the location he knew Shikamaru had marked out.

"Naruto, Sasuke told us you were trapped inside of Ami's house, how did you escape?" That was Choji. At least he and Shikamaru had gotten out of their pesky situation.

"Yakumo was there, and she really didn't want to see Sasuke worship going on. Ami brought like five people over including her and she got them out of the room so she could have peace. She discovered me and let me go on one condition."

"The condition? You better not have sold us out, teme!"

"Of course I wouldn't sell you out, ttebayo! You guys are my friends!"

"As troublesome as it is, can we ask what she demanded?"

"She just wanted to know how many people were involved. I guess she realized that I couldn't have done it all on my own." Naruto laughed before Shikamaru asked the next question.

"Did you tell her how many of us there actually were?" Naruto gave an affirmative as he rushed through the streets more, now thankfully out of noise range of Ami's house.

"Yeah, why?"

"Naruto, why didn't you lie? Couldn't you just say that there were more or less of us than there actually were?" Naruto paused and his face crunched up in thought before a feeling of idiocy washed over the Uzumaki's existence

"Gomen Sasuke, but I, uh, didn't think about it?" Naruto gave a nervous laugh as across the board, sweat dropping happened.

"BAKA!" It seemed that Kiba had recovered first.

"Kiba, you're being loud and it's troublesome. Naruto, get back to HQ and we'll continue planning from there." Naruto nodded, and within a few minutes he had rushed into the clearing to find his four compatriots waiting for him.

Shikamaru sighed in relief and moved the Queen next to the King, where the Knight, Bishop, and Rook were already sitting. Looking at the map, Naruto saw something odd.

"Shikamaru, what's this piece doing?" The Nara looked at the board, seeing that Naruto was pointing. Following the finger, Shikamaru's eyes widened. The pawn! He had forgotten about the pawn!

"Kiba, where is Akamaru?" The Inuzuka's eyes shot up as he too realized that Akamaru was gone.

"He should have been able to catch up with me…" Choji nudged Kiba and asked for more information.

"The Inuzuka dogs typically have better smells than the clan members until adolescence, when the skills even out a bit. If Akamaru isn't here, then that means… Something's happened to him!" Jumping up, all five members of the group looked around at the clearing, the missing pawn, and the fact that the sun was approaching the horizon. Time was short, and a member of their company was missing.

 **Happy Independence Day for my American readers, I know I'm certainly looking forward to fireworks. I have very little to say aside from that except sorry for taking so long, and I hope to be able to write another chapter very soon. This chapter's pacing feels a little skewed to me, so I'm hoping it looks okay on the reader's end. If this one happens to be worse off than the others, I guarantee the next chapter will be better, I have ~1k words written for it already. Also, when I started writing, I had 1,111 hits, and 11 reviews. I find this amusing.**

 **Happy Huning.**

 **~KoS.**


	5. Chapter 5: Trouble in Takigakure!

**I could rattle on for an hour about why I'm justified for not quite finishing the chapter I was working on, but I'll boil it down to three reasons why you should (hopefully) not tear me limb from limb.**

 **1\. I finished up my job at a summer camp recently, but until then I was gone from my computer for a span of roughly 9.5 hrs daily (including driving to and from), and with a sleep schedule of roughly 6 hrs a night that leaves me with a lot of time, yes, but that includes the brief time in the morning between waking up and going to work, dinner time, and getting some form of R & R from working with kids, quite a few of which gave me headaches for some reason or another. That being said, now that the camp is finished, I can dedicate more time and energy to writing good quality chapters, something I was struggling with greatly.**

 **2\. I've been playing a bit too much League of Legends, and have found Xin Zhao a far too fun character to use, not even factoring that he's based off of the historical warrior Zhao Yun. Nuff said.**

 **3\. I have been doing a lot of consulting with a friend of mine about how the story should play out, and as such I've had to modify this chapter, and after struggling with it enough I decided to simply upload the definitely complete part first and work on the more difficult chapter knowing that I have at least (albeit in a very late fashion) updated this story.**

 **So, on to my one response Kronus96:**

 **The bit about Minato basing the Rasengan off of the Bijuu is a very valid point, and I'm not even going to try to make us agree on the 'strongest bijuu' question. That is true that Shukaku and Son Goku were already in the Mazo, had forgotten about that. I would be very interested in discussing it, but perhaps once I finish uploading the next chapter.**

 **I'm happy you like my Shikamaru, I really enjoy his character and can see a lot of ways for him to go. His unique personality also makes him a pleasure to write about. I will admit, I felt very shaky about the battle between Jiraiya and Orochimaru, and I would agree that Jiraiya got owned. Let's not forget that Orochimaru studies jutsu practically 24/7 while Jiraiya does spy network stuff, writes smut, and peeps on naked women in hot springs. The gap between them should reflect that.**

 **One would think Sarutobi knows just about everything of his current world, or else the "Professor" wouldn't have quite the towering reputation, eh? I didn't really think of Naruto as pulling a Tobirama, but I guess it definitely fits. Whenever I read about Sasuke-worship on this sight, I also feel disturbed yet strangely amused. I tried to emulate that. I have a bit of a soft spot for the Kurama heiress, so expect more of her along the way ^_^.**

 **Anyhow, now that I've wasted plenty of space replying to quite the in-depth review, I would like to continue. If anyone has any things they think should be added or recommendations to make, or really anything to say to me about this story, please leave a review or a PM in my inbox. Thanks. Even though this chapter is extremely late and a bit shorter than usual, I hope it does me some justice here.**

A man walked a lesser road in the Land of Rivers, geta sandals kicking up dust as he walked. Walking with determination, Jiraiya marched towards the secret entrance of Takigakure, the Village Hidden by the Waterfall. Three years of poking around, following the trail leading to Orochimaru had lead him back, near the sight of his humiliating defeat.

Even with Sennin Modo, even with the Nidaisengama, even with the surprise attacks and wily nature of the Gama Sennin, Jiraiya still failed. At least only one battle was lost.

Jiraiya lived to fight another day.

Banishing thoughts of failure and fear from his head, the self-proclaimed Super Pervert continued down his road. If Orochimaru was in Takigakure, nothing short of the village leader sacrificing himself with Hero's Water would repel the Snake Sannin. Even then, Jiraiya had heard reports of Orochimaru digging around in old battlefields, so perhaps keeping Shido alive was a bit of a necessity.

 _ **Takigakure**_

Three years had passed since the forest gained light from dozens of beautiful glowing lanterns, who sat above the numerous trees like spiritual guardians.

In this new time, Fuu's home hadn't changed a whole lot, but a much more intensive trap system had been set up, incorporating more webbing and other various pranking elements. Instead of simply giving people an orange paint covering, great quantities of time and finance had been used to supply enough traps to give people a myriad of colors depending on where they tried entering Fuu's home from.

Even though Fuu, Kidomaru, and Takano did plenty to make Fuu's home safe, people kept slipping through traps, and once a few managed to get through, many exploited weaknesses in the traps to cause great damage to Fuu's defenses.

Luckily, Fuu was never in her home at the time of these incursions, but no words can describe the sadness as Fuu saw her clearing looking more like the Fourth Shinobi World War breaking out than a home. Shido-sama and Shibuki-sama frequently allocated funds to a reserve account for sending Shinobi missions to rebuild her clearing, and her house was never damaged during those, luckily. It also helped that Takano helped her rebuild daily, and whenever Kidomaru wasn't stuck with Beikomu training he would use his sharper vision to search for any evidence to find out who had done damage.

Outside of the academy, her relations with her friends hadn't changed a whole lot, at least not in Fuu's eyes. Kidomaru was busy a lot, so Fuu didn't often see her first friend outside of school, but Takano had almost become a daily fix in Fuu's life.

Takano often ran into the forest first thing in the morning, went through the traps, and yelled up at Fuu until she joined him in walking to the academy. After their first encounter, Takano had shown a more boisterous and confident personality, but had enough courage and cunning to back it up. Takano was also improving his shinobi skills at a decent rate, not at Kidomaru's, but he still had the potential to be a Jonin one day, as did Fuu.

Living alone while building a fortress of traps and dodging legal repercussions developed one's intelligence, even though it forced Fuu to let go of her childhood. Luckily for the Nanabi's Jinchuriki, Takano still embodied some childish characteristics, namely unending naivety and confidence.

Fuu still didn't know why people were going out of their way to attack her place though. Maybe it was because her home was out of the way, maybe it was because she was young, but Fuu had recently come to a conclusion. She couldn't remember much of the announcement Shido-sama had made, but some attention was on her because of it, and then there was that weird ritual…

Clearing her head with a shake, Fuu moved on her way to the academy, and stopped outside of the building as she heard a familiar voice around the side.

"…as I said last time, I'm Beikomu Kidomaru, not the damn spider god incarnate!" Kidomaru's fury was evident in his voice. Fuu ran towards the noise and stayed as close as she could without alerting anyone to her presence.

"You are a member of the Beikomu clan, and as a member of the clan, you are expected to help the clan in any way possible. You are quite possibly the only one who can use the summoning contract outside of the elders, and if you can't use it, your sacrifice will guarantee someone will!" Fuu recognized the voice, it was of the stern Beikomu clansman who came every day to make sure Kidomaru went to the clan grounds instead of goofing off with her. He was a sour, middle-aged man, and Fuu knew that Kidomaru hated him.

"And as a shinobi-in-training of Takigakure, my primary duty is to serve the village that protects our precious Beikomu clan, and as Kidomaru my duty is to help my friends and those I believe in! I'm not going to be some damn minor character in the Beikomu chronicles!" Fuu blinked. Kidomaru was never so forward in all the time Fuu knew him. He usually had a guise of laziness or nonchalance, but low and behold a time did arise when he was zealous…

"Yes, you, _Beikomu_ Kidomaru, who have no techniques outside of what the _clan_ has gladly put on a pedestal for you, insolent whelp! Have you not forgotten the clan's policy? Clan first, village second, individual third! You sign the contract after the academy today, and if I hear one thing about not wanting it, you'll be forbidden from seeing those friends you claim to have." Kidomaru groaned and the Beikomu clan member walked off, an air of smugness about him as Fuu saw him pass by,

Once Fuu was sure he was gone, she ran over towards Kidomaru, who had slumped against the wall in a tired state.

"I heard your conversation, are you really going to learn the summoning jutsu, Kidomaru?" Kidomaru groaned and put one hand against his head, fingers going to his temples. Fuu was excited for Kidomaru though, the summoning jutsu was famous as perhaps the only technique aside from the Substitution jutsu

"The one damn conversation I didn't need overheard and someone _has_ to hear it?" Fuu frowned at him.

"But for now, they're the only sensei you got. Can't you just make do with it? You were acting kinda bratty…" Kidomaru snorted.

"Well, actually, a hypothetical route appeared and… Never mind. Ignore that. I'm going inside." Fuu's eyes narrowed in suspicion as she followed the Beikomu prodigy inside. Before he had gotten too far though, Fuu felt the need to make something sure.

"Should I tell Takano about what I saw?" Kidomaru froze, stock still, before turning around, and a ferocity not usually present in Beikomu Kidomaru's lifestyle emerged.

"No one will know about the glitch you saw. No one!" Fuu nodded and placed one hand over her heart.

"I, Fuu, promise not to tell anyone about what I saw. Cross my heart and hope to die." Kidomaru nodded before letting out a tense breath and continuing his walk to the classroom.

Throughout the day, Fuu noticed Kidomaru kept zoning out in class, drawing sketches of the Beikomu clan symbol with shashes through it. The pristine, spider-like lines were incomplete, the eyes small and beady in comparison to their larger, more alive-looking counterparts, the main body slashed through. For whatever reason, Kidomaru would shy away his paper from both Fuu and Takano whenever they would try looking. Takano felt suspiciously about it, but Fuu assumed it had to do with what she had promised the Beikomu prodigy that morning.

During lunch, Kidomaru had vanished off to who-knows-where, leaving Takano and Fuu alone. When the Beikomu came back, he made straight for the classroom, looking like he was trying to suppress a smile. When Takano pursued Kidomaru about where he had been and why he had such an awkward look, the six-armed boy shrugged him off, ignoring the question. Takano was less than happy, and was on edge until the end of the day.

As Fuu marched home from the academy with Takano quick behind her, the two noticed smoke, but it wasn't coming from her clearing. Confused, the two marched off towards the smoke to find scorch marks, small potholes from paper bomb blasts. Fuu frowned and felt an ominous sensation in her stomach, like a freezing animal was grabbing her insides and mashing them together.

Surrounding the blast were charred remains of a couple of trees unfortunate enough to be in this trap. Fuu frowned. She had never set anything in her traps that could cause real harm to people, and certainly nothing of this scale!

If any of those vandals or whoever they were got attacked by shinobi tools and hurt, she would be held accountable, after all.

"Fuu, isn't this where we set up a trap?" Takano murmured, coming to a similar train of thought as Fuu. The mint-haired Jinchuriki nodded and her eyes narrowed. The targeted trees and areas were where their paint bombs would go off, the range of damage corresponded exactly with her traps.

"Takano, why would someone go to the trouble of replacing our ammunition with real explosives?" Takano frowned and looked at the traps which were more visible once sprung.

"I don't know, but, well… Only you, me, and Kidomaru know about these traps. Could he have set it up?" Fuu looked at Takano sharply, as if questioning why he would suspect their friend.

"I'm not being _that_ accusing, Fuu! I'm just saying that he's the only other person who could have set it up! I've been with you this whole time, and the only other person who knows about this is him!" That was certainly undeniable. Unless someone had been watching that trap get set up, no one could possibly have replaced the traps except them and maybe someone helping fix her home. Maybe. "Plus, didn't he vanish off during lunch? Who knows where he went?" Fuu froze a little before responding with irritation.

"Fine, well what are we gonna do about it? It's not like we can march up to him and accuse him of that!" Fuu and Takano glared at each other as a third voice made itself heard.

"Jeez, what are you two fighting about? Did Taka-baka killsteal you, Fuu? Who are we accusing of what?" Kidomaru walked in and grinned at his two irritated friends, two hands casually supporting his head as he leaned it back, the other four loosely hanging at his sides. Despite his seeming happiness, Kidomaru had an air of tiredness and fatigue, and bags of exhaustion were under the Beikomu's eyes that weren't there when he left the academy. At least he wasn't angry or different like before, but… Just what the hell had that summoning contract taken out of him?

"Kido, why did you fill our traps with real weapons? Some of the traps went off!" Kidomaru's eyes widened as his hands dropped immediately.

"The hell do you mean fill our traps with real weapons? You know we can't do that! Fuu'll get in trouble if someone got hurt!" Takano pointed at the smoke in fury.

"I was with Fuu when we saw the smoke, and you are the only other person who knows about this, don't play dumb!" Takano was shouting at this point, as Kidomaru's fists balled up and he pointed at Takano.

"Well what the hell do you know about what I do? I was roped into another of the dipshit elders' talks about how I need to be like the spider! That wasn't me!" Takano's face went red with anger.

"Then you're a liar and a traitor, the smoke would have gone away if it had been there for a while, which means it only recently sprung up, and so you're lying!" Kidomaru's eyes closed as his anger became more apparent.

"How do you have a right to call me a liar and a traitor when your kin were the one who started the attacks on Fuu's home?" Kidomaru's anger was barely restrained, and Takano's was visibly becoming more powerful.

"You know, Kidomaru, you always talk about your clan and how stupid their values are, and how we should measure individuals rather than groups…" Takano gave a furious glare and shifted into a more battle-ready stance.

"And yet you have the gall to insult me with my relatives who I actively oppose through all of my time, sweat, and toil to help set up traps? If anyone doesn't have the right to accuse me, it's you, mister 'I hate being the clan prodigy'!" Kidomaru was shaking with rage, like his entire body was overfilled and ready to blow.

"I hate a lot of my clan's words about me, comparing me to a huge arachnid of all things, but I do approve of one of their policies." Takano gestured for Kidomaru to continue.

"I really approve of their policy when two people have a dispute; we practice trial by combat. Are you man enough to back up your words, or are you just a coward with a flappy tongue?" Takano removed the small blunted tanto on his waist, holding it up at eye level, parallel to the ground.

"You two, stop this." Fuu's voice carried more power than it usually did, but the two boys were over their heads.

"Whenever you're ready, spider freak!" Kidomaru grinned and pulled out Kumo Nenkin from his mouth, forming the golden substance into six daggers he held at varying angles and positions.

"Right back at you, Taka-teme!" With that, the two academy students charged each other with speed that, while slower than a slug to a ninja, seemed fast to the two fighters.

Takano's tanto was longer and harder than the Kumo Nenkin daggers; his greater strength and body mass allowed him to put more power behind his slashes, and in the process slashed through two of Kidomaru's knives. Kidomaru now only had four. Eyes widening, the Beikomu clan member jumped back, throwing two of the Kumo Nenkin, which, though not hitting Takano, made him jump back.

The Beikomu them grabbed the Kumo Nenkin forming in his mouth and shaped them into daggers as he threw all six this time, with decent accuracy. Takano managed to swat the ones that put him at risk out of the air, but the last one forced him to move the tanto at an awkward angle, and the force was just right to throw the sword out of the Hizen member's hand.

Growling, Takano charged Kidomaru, who grabbed each of Takano's arms with two of his, as Kidomaru positioned his other two arms in such a way that any kicks Takano tried would be blocked. As they faced each other, Kidomaru spit some webbing onto Takano's face, as Kidomaru let go of the Hizen and kicked him in the gut.

Groaning, Takano awkwardly ran back to his tanto and tried slicing through the webbing, and succeeded. Kidomaru cursed when he saw this, realizing his technique still had work to be done until it was weapon proof.

As this was going on, Fuu formed the tiger seal and kept her gaze firmly on a stream away from the fighting. Judging by the sounds of tanto and dagger clashing, Takano and Kidomaru were really getting into the fight. As two clones created themselves out of water and assumed Fuu's features, she gestured for them to come over to her.

The real Fuu grabbed a blunted kunai as Fuu positioned herself near Takano and the clones near Kidomaru. The two had no clue what was going on due to their investment in the fight.

Takano rushed through hand seals; Rat, Tiger, Dog, Ox, Rabbit, Tiger. Recognizing the buildup of chakra from the few times they had done ninjutsu together, Kidomaru quickly spat out as much webbing as he could, creating a large but sizable net on its way towards Takano.

" **Katon: Hosenka no Jutsu**!" Takano fired out five small fireballs at once, and each one hit webbing. The only issue for Takano was the fact that the Fire Release jutsu took the chakra in the webbing and used its energy as a medium for the combustion. And it was heading towards Takano. At high speed.

As Fuu's eyes widened, her plan changed from stopping the two to stopping Takano from burning to a crisp. The net came down on him and an ungodly scream came from underneath as Kidomaru turned around, his expression blank.

"Kido, help me! We gotta get him out of there!" Kidomaru turned around and crossed his arms.

"Not until he surrenders." Fuu's eyes widened at the cruelty Kidomaru was showing, his eyes still shadowed.

"Please, Kido!" Fuu's water clones ran into the Hizen's coat and dispelled, dousing the flames.

"It was his own chakra that got him burnt!" Fuu turned angrily.

"Whose webbing was it that ignited? You knew that chakra ran through your netting and you still used it!" Kidomaru scoffed and turned around, disdainfully staring at the downed Hizen.

"He had it coming." Fuu shook her head at the absurdity of Kidomaru's words, still in shock about what had happened to her friend.

"Takano accused you of something. _Verbally._ This is really how you show him your innocence?" Fuu's eyes narrowed. Kidomaru took a deep breath and walked off, but not before having the last word.

"I have no regrets about what happened, but I hope you understand he had it coming, and once he admits I won this match I'll have no issues with him." Fuu's mouth hung open like a goldfish as Takano managed to get out of the webbing, luckily with minimal damage. Takano coughed several times as his breathing became labored, no doubt from all the smoke…

Making a decision, Fuu grabbed Takano and threw him over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes before running to the nearest hospital, which was in the center of the village, almost twenty-five minutes away. As if today couldn't get worse…

Running inside, Fuu ignored the stares of hatred and the peoples' jeers as she gave Takano to the nurse at the front desk, who upon paying attention to the boy in Fuu's arms, started demanding for her fellow doctors and nurses to prepare a stretcher and give medical attention immediately. Takano was scooped out of Fuu's grasp and taken away.

Left momentarily alone, Fuu thought about the past day. Clearly something was wrong, and it wasn't just Kidomaru being angsty. Something bad was going on with him. Sighing, Fuu sat down and started sorting her memories of Kidomaru, everything from when they had first met up to the last hour.

Beikomu Kidomaru. Six armed, the prodigy of the Beikomu clan. He mastered the melee jutsu and engaged in fights with his clan often.

Fights. Fuu had seen Kidomaru fight against his clan many times, and today Kidomaru fought against Takano. When Takano appeared in Fuu's and his life, Kidomaru was suspicious. Today, Takano was throwing accusations against Kidomaru and insulted his clan. Why was Kidomaru so willing to fight to avenge insult to its name if he was so against it? Or was he not against the clan, but specific members?

Fuu knew that Kidomaru was an orphan, both of his parents had died two years ago in a mission, at which point the clan elders took over his training. Clan elders; they viewed Kidomaru as the ideal continuation of the clan, a figurehead and a mascot for the Beikomu's strength. Kidomaru hated being used. However, the clan were Kidomaru's family, his teachers, and they shared the same blood as him. Fuu herself had asked about why he was so hostile towards his clan, and he had said…

" _Well, actually, a hypothetical route appeared and… Never mind. Ignore that."_ Fuu frowned. Just what did Kidomaru mean by a hypothetical route? The "Well, actually" would suggest that this route was different from Fuu's point, which at the time was about sensei, meaning that… He had another sensei of some kind, or did Kidomaru not need the Beikomu clan? Did he do something to revoke their teaching? Was that why the clan were so angry with him? Fuu shook her head, dispelling her thoughts, cringing as the thought of Takano's slightly charred, writhing body filled her head. Oh well, at least the week was done and Takano was in the best hands to heal him in Takigakure.

Fuu left the hospital, deciding she would visit Takano another time. For now, she needed sleep, and some time to sort where she stood on this emotional mess. Walking into the forest, walking into the clearing, and finally, walking into her home, Fuu's mind was silent, and no sounds from the outside penetrated her head.

Fuu saw her bed, and walked over to it, before lying down and falling asleep, feelings of fatigue in her mind and pain in her heart prevalent.

 _ **The Next Day**_

Fuu yawned, and giggled happily. Today was a Saturday. No homework, no waking up early, just rest and relaxation for the mint-haired girl! Well, at least until she chose to think about Kidomaru and Takano, but for now she would shove those thoughts away.

Looking up at the ceiling and stretching with another yawn, Fuu sat up and walked through the main room to her kitchen, admiring the unusual clutter of materials the old owner had left behind, which was present to some degree even after the three years Fuu had lived in the apartment. Nope, not going to think about her friends in the slightest. Today was not-dealing-with-friends'-bullshit day!

Whoever the old man was that owned this place was, he was… Unorthodox. Half of the crap that he had left behind was weird to say the least. Maps of places Fuu had never seen before littered the ground below a table shoved awkwardly into a corner, and figurines lined one shelf of the bookcase in the other corner. In other sections of the bookshelf, paintings and books lined the walls, with the books ranging from "The Art of Winemaking" to "Military strategy for dummies."

While Fuu had found some of the old man's possessions, she had found nothing but these little nonsensical tidbits, some bare essentials for living, and alcohol. Ungodly amounts of it, too. Moving towards some figures she found on a bookshelf to inspect them, Fuu allowed her eyes to rove over each one's form.

The first figurine was a weak-looking man in a chariot, a fan in one hand and a piece of paper of some sort in the other. Picking the figure up and inspecting it, she couldn't tell what the man was holding. Maybe he was a writer? Inspecting the kanji at the foot of the small figurine, Fuu read the words "Wings" on it. Huh.

The second figurine looked haughty and confident, clean shaven with long, straight hair, a spear in one of his hands and a bag of gold, if the coin on the verge of spilling out was any indication, in the other. Turning the figurine over, Fuu noticed a dagger placed ominously close to the bag. The kanji below the figurine read "Equal".

The third figurine was short and stout, with a long, unusual spear with a forked end and a jagged spear point. A bristling beard that looked like it had been shocked with a bolt of lightning went from the man's face down to mid-chest. The figure looked to be shouting and Fuu noticed with slight amusement that this figure had a sword at his waist which was surrounded by numerous bottles. The kanji next to this one said "Butcher".

The fourth was mounted, and amidst his heavy armor a long, straight beard was prominent. The man's horse had a mane of what looked like fire, and the man was a giant compared to it. Perhaps his horse was a pony? Either way, the man looked very composed, much like how Fuu would imagine a noble, or perhaps the god Susano'o. The caption read "God". Perhaps this one was Susano'o?

The fifth was an old-looking man with a hearty laughing expression, an arrow fully nocked. His long mane of a beard and a balding head sat upon a strong-looking body, with long, heavy-looking robes and a hood that wasn't raised. Crinkled eyes and a large nose gave the man an almost grandfatherly expression, but Fuu felt that she really wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of this man's anger. The character below him read "Spirit".

The sixth figure was in the middle of the rest, and held a spear with one hand and appeared to be in mid-sprint, his other hand holding a small bundle to his chest as the clean-shaven figure's ponytail appeared to be in mid-flap. The figure's caption read "Loyal", and unlike the others with weapons, the figure had no scars whatsoever.

The seventh figure was sitting atop a weak-looking horse, and despite wearing the robes of a royal official, had several arrows sticking out of his chest, and the man was _smiling_ , though in a wistful way. In one hand, the man held a mask, and the other hand rested atop the arrows he was staring down at. The kanji for "Substitute" sat proudly at the bottom of the figurine.

Fuu looked at each one from left to right; Butcher, Equal, Substitute, Spirit, God, Wings, Loyal. Picking up Spirit, Fuu saw the character for Big, and after moving each one away, Fuu saw that another character was underneath each one. Curious, Fuu grabbed a piece of paper and wrote down everything.

The kanji on the figures she knew, and the characters underneath were, left to right; Youth, Drunk, Dragon, Guard, Phoenix, Majesty, Pride. Perhaps this was a code of some kind?

The mint-haired Jinchuriki looked around at the things around the room. The alcohol could probably be used to reference the 'Drunk' one, should Fuu find out what the figures' connection was to that. Perhaps it was just some old man game she didn't know about. Grabbing Spirit, and looking around, she saw the youth kanji. Fuu felt an amused smirk creep up her face as she realized she was putting the old man on the 'Youth' kanji. However, once she placed him, she noticed a light green glow coming from the figure. Raising an eyebrow, Fuu retracted her thought that it was some old man game. Perhaps the code theory was more accurate after all.

Fuu looked around at paintings in the room. Three figures kneeling at a table with a small, smoking sacrifice in a bowl on the table. Pink blossoms surrounded the scene. Another showed one of the figures from the previous painting screaming across a bridge, while the figure with the caption for "Loyal" was running, in a similar pose to how he was in the scene. Looking closely at the package, Fuu saw a small rosy visage amidst the cloth being held. Was he holding a baby? Fuu looked back at the kanji on the table. While 'youth' could work because of the baby, that one was already used…. Argh! This would take a while…

Inside of Fuu's body, the sight of the paintings and the figurines stirred the attention of a massive horned beetle, the Nanabi no Kabutomushi. Looking through the seal at the figurines, blank shock overtook the eyes of the beast. Takataki had made those, there was no doubt about it, and Chomei had a good idea of where each one went. Pushing a tiny bit of chakra to change the flow of Fuu's thoughts for a few seconds, the beast started to invest himself in cracking the code of his previous host.

 _ **Another Place…**_

"A seventy percent accuracy at thirty yards, that's not bad at all for your age." Kidomaru turned around, a golden Kumo Nenkin bow already had an arrow in it, nocked and ready for firing. The cloth on Kidomaru's forehead was gone, and a third eye sat, glaring along with the other two. Kidomaru recognized the figure in the long black cloak and bowed low, dropping his bow.

"Gomen Nasai, Orochimaru-sama. I guarantee it won't happen again." The figure cackled before slipping out of the darkness of the trees, approaching his student. Placing one clammy, pale hand on Kidomaru's shoulder, Orochimaru glanced at the human-shaped targets, noting that the majority of projectiles that landed hit internal organs or the head. Little Kido wasn't holding back at all.

"Soon we will have to leave Takigakure for good, I believe my old teammate has placed a mole in my forces, and my location has been compromised. Kidomaru looked up at Orochimaru, a betrayed expression on his face. Even though the snake man only arrived once every few weeks, he had given Kidomaru pointers and the methods to making his Kumo Nenkin, and Kidomaru's overall strength had increased two or threefold from Orochimaru's pointers. The Beikomu prodigy would surely have died in that summoning ritual his clan had put him through without those pointers. Of course, it didn't occur to Kidomaru that the clan wouldn't have forced him to try it that early without Orochimaru increasing the former's strength.

"You're leaving for good, Orochimaru-sama?" Kidomaru's eyes were shadowed as an aura of grief left his body. Orochimaru brought his hand from Kidomaru's shoulder to the top of his head.

"I'm not leaving for good, I'm bringing you away from this dump to my power base. _We_ are leaving for good." Kidomaru's eyes gained a light and a hope before clouding.

"The Beikomu Spider contract can reverse-track me. Even if I took the scroll, they could still reverse-summon me." Orochimaru grinned.

"I was hoping you would say that, Kidomaru." The nine year old boy frowned at Orochimaru in confusion. What did he mean by that?

"To remove a name from a contract, either the contract must be made null and void, or one of the parties must cease to exist. If there was only one person with a valid signature on the summoning contract, would that not prevent that party from being endangered by the contract?" Kidomaru nodded, but then frowned.

"But the village would surely react and must have some method of seizing the contract back? Don't you think they have the loyalty of the contract somehow?" Orochimaru laughed, giving Kidomaru both hope and a shiver down his spine.

"Remember your clan's policy, Kidomaru? Isn't it 'Clan first, village second'?" Kidomaru nodded before connecting the dots. No way would his xenophobic, self-centered clan grant their valued contract to anyone in the village, even if Shido-sama gave them half of the village's funds.

"So, are you going to… Kill them or something?" Orochimaru shook his head.

" _We_ are going to kill them. It would be good to get experience for your archery after all, and I'll even grant you a share of my power when we're done." Kidomaru's eyes widened in horror as his face paled and then greened. Kill his own clanmates? No matter how much he hated them, could he bring himself to spill their blood, to watch the light fade from their eyes? Could he walk the path of a kinslayer?

"But… Why… How… How can I…" Orochimaru gave his most wicked grin.

"It's either their lives or I pull my deal. I'll help out, but I won't give without expecting you to help out in return." Plus, though Orochimaru left this part unmentioned, it would make Kidomaru unfavorable for anyone looking for recruits – anyone who slew even a portion of his family was not well loved, even if it was just the elders who controlled a contract. It would make him unable to go anywhere, and unable to stray from Orochimaru's side.

"Fine. But… Give me some time. I want to at least be able to prepare a good bow." Orochimaru opened his cloak and pulled out a bow with a series of arrows.

"Each one of these will pierce armor, bone, and flesh at thirty meters, your best range. The bow itself should extend that range too, I had it specially made in the event we needed to dye Takigakure red." Kidomaru felt sick again, but picked up the bow, arrows, and bowed low before placing his hands in a symbol that many a vassal would give to their overlord.

"I humbly accept your gift, and I will repay you for this kindness, Orochimaru-sama." Orochimaru nodded, his wicked grin turning into a more neutral expression.

"I will be expecting you at sundown, and do not forget a list of every Beikomu who has signed that contract. If we even forget one, _you_ will be placed in jeopardy, and that would be _long_ before I knew about it." Kidomaru nodded, face still green…

 _ **With Fuu…**_

"And that leaves Loyal and Butcher with Drunk or Guard. Which one goes where?" Fuu hm'd before miraculously remembering that there didn't seem to be consequences for getting it wrong. Giggling happily, she placed Loyal on Drunk, and there was no green light accompanying, so she moved it onto Guard, at which point another green light flared. Fuu looked at the last figurine in her hand, the green Butcher with his odd spear. Placing him on the 'Drunk' Kanji, all seven lights were lit up as the green lights shone on one spot at the back of the bookshelf where a button was forming from the light. Frowning, Fuu pressed it. Just what exactly had the old guy been up to?

As the button was pressed, a small compartment previously hidden inside of the dresser popped open, and a scroll sat inside. Unfurling it, Fuu found one entry, the Kanji for "Mind". Frowning at it, Fuu placed her finger on the Kanji, wondering if something would happen. Just as she was about to pull her finger away, she felt a whooshing sensation and the world went black…

 **And… CUT! Okay everyone, take five before we start again.**

 **Sorry once more for the short chapter and the long delay. I wonder what the old man has left behind in his old home, eh? Little Kido and Takano aren't quite getting along either.**

 **August is right around the corner, so I hope to finish more chapters before school starts again. Junior year, whoopee…**

 **~KingsOfSarutobi**


	6. Chapter 6: Seals, Kinslayers, & Intrigue

**This story has been neglected for an overly long period of time, and I have no excuses. Given that I can't quite remember which reviews I have yet to discuss, I'll consider it a blank slate and hope that you all will give me some mercy for my flaws.**

 **Additionally, this chapter was (mostly) written back in July/August, and I left it mostly as-is, meaning there could be errors here and there, and I've found that the pacing of my stories is often awkward, sometimes to the point of physical pain. In the event you experience such pains, please contact your nearest doctor and tell them you're suffering from an acute dosage of sarcasm.**

 **With this chapter done, I can start working on the larger plot of the story, and do what I can to speed things up into the main Naruto storyline, so if you're not 100% happy with this, don't fret.**

 **Thank you for your time, and expect another chapter sometime before 2017.**

 **~KoS**

Fuu's eyes opened as she looked around, seeing a stone, circular room lit by torches. In the center, a figure was sitting at a table, legs crossed. Fuu looked closely and remembered a picture from her home. The picture showed the old man who used to live in the home, with a spiky-haired young man and a somewhat short-haired woman who was quite beautiful despite her cold expression. The three were smiling, albeit the woman's was much smaller than the laughing expression on the old man and the wild one on the young man. Strangely, the woman did have a slight air of familiarity, but Fuu couldn't feel from where.

Fuu knew that what she was looking at was technically impossible – the old man was dead! Fuu had seen his grave! Fuu had brought numerous unopened bottles to his grave, primarily because there were so many she couldn't get rid of them all by conventional means! And yet, he was sitting, legs crossed, drinking from a bowl of wine and eating food on a short table. Needless to say, Fuu's legs turned into jelly and she paled considerably, but her eyes were drawn to the impossibility of the situation. While Fuu watched him, the old man started talking to himself.

"Ahh, the joys of good meat, rice, and plenty of wine. A shame my son never learned how to make these pork buns. Probably that good-for-nothing wife of mine's fault…" The man started eating again and laughed a little before adding in a slightly lower voice;

"Hell, it's not like she had any reason to give me any favors, never mind two children and a loving household. She was far too young when she married me. Far, far too young." The man said, before picking up what looked like a chicken wing and ripping the meat off, slight quantities of grease going into his beard. "Then again, that was all my fault. Shame that little Summer Marquis got angry. Oh well, at least the enemy that traveled back from the battle with me wasn't him. That would've been horribly awkward." The man sighed and leaned back, patting the dirty and rather nondescript gray robes he wore.

"I wish the others were here though. I guess that's the pain of being the first to die." His nose wrinkled. "At least, one of the first to die. That little man never got to show he was the smartass's peer. Shame the little shitter died so young." It was at that point that his beady eyes, rather than being focused on a spot towards the ceiling, focused on his mint-haired guest.

"Oh, I've been waiting for someone to show up… Forgive my poor manners, would you? I've always been a tactless brute." Fuu looked at the twinkly old eyes that occupied the bear-like man's face. After a few seconds of awkwardness on Fuu's part, the old man laughed, and dragged up a second seat in front of the table, facing him. Fuu sat down and loosely crossed her legs, as he took another hearty gulp before pouring more in from a container that listed the liquid inside as Plum Wine. Fuu didn't have to look to know that though, she had dumped all of the alcohol in his house out.

"I see you aren't happy about the wine I have. Seen it before?" Fuu remained silent, and nodded before looking down. The old man observed the mint-haired child before sighing and asking more questions.

"So you must've been the one to get my house when I died?" Fuu looked up, a confused expression already asking about his knowledge. The man laughed. "I loved my wine and sure could I stockpile when I really wanted to…" He turned and noted that Fuu was still slightly pale. Did she think he was a ghost?

"You must be curious how I'm here when I'm dead." Fuu looked up for a brief second before flushing and looking down. The old man wasn't even doing anything and his very presence was making her embarrassed!

"Well, I technically _am_ dead, but this is a bit of chakra I left behind, along with enough food to let me live like a Daimyo for a full century. Can you believe that?" Fuu shook her head. The man sighed and rubbed his temples, looking for a way to stop things from becoming painfully awkward.

"I see you found the scroll I left behind?" Fuu nodded.

"And that old goat Shido left you my house?" Another nod.

"Are you a shinobi, or rather a shinobi in training?" Asked the old man, clearly noticing that she was far too young to be a trained ninja.

"Hai, I am." Fuu's voice came out weak and quiet, in comparison to the gruff but not unkind voice of the other.

"Do you know how to channel chakra, young one?" Fuu nodded. She knew the Mizu Bunshin no Jutsu, of course she had to know how to channel chakra!

"Could you please channel some? I've almost forgotten what chakra felt like in here." Fuu blinked before closing her eyes and concentrating. Fuu reached inside herself, focusing on that warm feeling in her stomach as she brought her chakra all throughout her body, eyes still closed. Outside of Fuu's psyche, Zhang Takataki looked at the seal on her stomach, before sighing and rubbing his temples.

"Still haven't upgraded the matrix… Oh well. At least I can figure out what's going on." Fuu looked up, orange eyes longing for an answer. The old man noticed it and eyed her warily for a couple of seconds.

"Hey kid, have you ever heard that the eyes are the keys to the soul?" Fuu shrugged. She had probably hadn't heard something like that in the past, but she didn't want to look weaker than she already did in wherever this was.

"Well, what do you see in my soul?" Fuu blinked before looking at his eyes, which had gone from beady black to glinting red, kind –and yet very familiar- smile still on his face.

"Your eyes became red?" The old one nodded.

"What else?" Fuu leaned forward, trying to focus on the eyes, rubbing her own. Had she not gotten enough sleep lately?

"Well they look different from your beard and other stuff, and they're glowing." Takataki kept eye contact, while Fuu felt the need for sleep going up. Hopefully she could get back to her home, and take a long nap.

"Oh? Are they glowing the same amount, or is it changing?" Fuu blinked, rubbing the nonexistent sand out of her eyes.

"Changing…" Fuu murmured, eyes closing as her head drooped forward, body remaining perfectly still.

"Channel chakra, please." Fuu's hands rose on her own and formed the ram seal, head still forward, eyes still closed. The black ink that marked the Nanabi's seal formed across Fuu's skin right around her stomach, and Takataki channeled chakra of his own before the kanji for 'enter' formed on his hand. Placing the hand with the Kanji on Fuu's head and holding the other in a half-ram seal, Zhang Takataki's world went dark.

Inside the Nanabi's seal, Chomei was panicking. His Jinchuriki had gone unconscious, what the hell did the old man put in that scroll? The instant Fuu had touched it, her psyche had been taken inside, and the Nanabi was now left chained inside an empty vessel! As the Nanabi tried everything from forcing chakra through to inspecting his own memories of the old man, Chomei found nothing. Nothing that would indicate what in the Elemental Nations Zhang Takataki had done.

Just as Chomei figured the best he could do was wait the storm until either Fuu's condition deteriorated to the point where he could theoretically break free or something happened, a flash of green light entered the seal. Yellow eyes narrowed in retaliation to the light as Chomei turned away.

"Hey ya big beetle, how're you holding up?" Said 'big beetle' first let out a snort of indignation before the cogs turned enough to recognize the voice that had been his jailor for years upon years.

" **Takataki? Is that you?"** the Former Jinchuriki of the Nanabi glared up at him.

"You know my proper name, Chomei. Let's try to be honest with each other at the very least." The Nanabi's eyes widened. Only his former Jinchuriki would ask for his true name, and not "Zhang Takataki" as he had called himself for years.

" **Hizen Zhang it is then. Tell me, what did you do to my host?"** Zhang leered.

"Oh come now, Chomei. The last time I saw that brat was when she was selected to be my heir, and she was a tiny little thing too! How many years has it been? Two? Three?" Chomei sighed at the Hizen's antics. Really, could the man _not_ be the brash idiot he consistently was for a minute? Even in death?

" **Going on four years, you old loon. Have you drunk yourself to new levels of idiocy, even as your soul is no doubt burning in hellfire?"** The old man glared. **"What, do you not doubt you're suffering now?"** The former Jinchuriki waved him off.

"Oh come now Chomei, we all knew I was destined for death the instant I was made your host, and we all knew I was destined for eternal torture the instant I started getting into drunken rages." If Chomei had eyes capable of rolling, they would have gone to the moon and back. Twice.

" **And yet, the blubbering idiot inside of you loved his wine so much that you couldn't even stop yourself from killing your subordinates in those rages? Thinking of hellfire?"**

"Oh, I think we both know I'm going through the demonic tortures _especially_ because I continued drinking." The two leveled glares, neither backing down, until Hizen Zhang burst into laughter, tears of joy coming from his face, as the Nanabi no Kabutomushi roared in laughter too. Such was the meeting between two who knew each other like the back of their own hands, or, er… wings in Chomei's case?

" **Even in death, you're still the one human other than my creator who can look at me as an equal without any fear, you know that?"** Hizen Zhang nodded, savoring his reunion with the beetle who was technically centuries older than him, despite not looking a day older than when the sealing first took place.

" **You know, I miss the old days. Even though I didn't care much for your grief of losing people or your drunken rages, you lived a nice life."** Hizen Zhang nodded, his will pulling alcohol from nowhere to drink.

"I would agree, and I don't think any of the others would disagree! I got a son who could easily have been a better fighter than me had he lived long enough, and a daughter to keep him in check better than his uncles kept his father!" Hizen Zhang looked towards his old companion.

"By the way, you hear about what happened to my daughter? Even though you kept trying to distract me from the fact that my son died, I still knew about it. Is my baby girl still alive?" The beetle bowed his head.

" **She is. She and her husband have become warriors of their own right. I haven't seen them much since you passed, but they looked good."** Zhang snorted.

"Of course they are. By the way, I have to thank you for that jutsu." One of Chomei's eyes crinkled and the other remained wide.

" **Jutsu? Which jutsu is this?"**

"The Uchiha originator's jutsu. Even a genjutsu and strategic dud like myself was able to manipulate the Nanabi's Jinchuriki because I had such a powerful tool under my belt." Chomei's eyes narrowed.

" **You mean like you did with that brat's niece?"** The Hizen got a very defensive look.

"No, your new jinchuriki is _far_ too young! Plus, do you not recall my wife followed me of her own will?" Chomei's eyes narrowed in a mix of disappointment and annoyance.

" **If 'her own will' is a code for 'brainwashing her until she thought you were a god', that statement would be accurate."** The old warrior drunk some more wine before turning to the swirling vortex of a portal, which was looking more intense than before.

"Listen, Chomei, old pal, I'd rather stay away from talking about this, and my time is rather limited, so I'm just going to say this once. I know you want to win in that bet against the Kyuubi fucker. I know you want to win really bad, and I'm not going to even consider you thinking otherwise. Train my successor, win, and if you can, find my heir and any descendants of her, and try to keep them safe. That's all I can ask for." Chomei bowed his head, and wistfully looked at the old warrior retreating into the light.

"Chomei."

" **Zhang Hizen."**

"It's been a good ride. May your next host be a better one than me!" With that, the old man's ruckus of laughter sounded once more, fading as the figure vanished into the light, which in turn disappeared for good.

Chomei sat in silence for several minutes before realizing that Fuu's psyche was returned but still in trance. Sighing, the giant beetle dispelled the genjutsu on his host, waking her up with a start, and darkened the seal's lighting. Even if the great Kabutomushi couldn't wear the black robes of mourning humans did, he could honor his old host, or… No. He could honor his old _friend_ by placing the black robes of darkness over the site of their last hurrah.

Maybe he would help the brat once he was done. Maybe.

 _ **Outside.**_

"It's time, Kidomaru." The Beikomu boy opened his eyes from trying to calm his nerves. He failed. Turning around with the bow and arrows his lord gave him, Kidomaru saw Orochimaru-sama approaching with two others – a silver haired boy around Kidomaru's size, with dark purple lips and pale, sickly skin, and a tall and quite fa-er, _large_ orange-haired boy who looked like he had the physical strength of a full trained ninja and the intelligence of a walnut.

"Kidomaru, may I introduce you to two of your future teammates? This is Jirobo," Orochimaru placed one hand on the orange haired boy's head, "And these two are the result of a rather unusual Kekkei Genkai. Meet Sakon and Ukon." Just as Kidomaru was about to ask about them, he saw a second head emerge from behind the silver-haired boy and appear, a perfect copy of the first showing his face while another hand appeared out of the person… pair?'s side, and waving.

"I'm Sakon." Said the boy in front.

"And I'm Ukon." Said the one who currently consisted of a head and arm. Well then.

"Did your parents fuck up a cheat code or something?" Kidomaru's face was scraunched up in disgust, and Jirobo, noticing Sakon and Ukon's anger, backed up.

"Why you little six armed-" Orochimaru put one hand over Sakon's mouth and the other on the face of Kidomaru, who had charged and was now in normal human range, not that either of them thought about the fact that he could probably extend his range.

"If you two want to fight, save it for a time when we aren't planning the partial destruction of a notable clan." The two instantly shut up and straightened.

"Let's go. I'll show you all the way." With that, the team of four made its way through a secret route into the Beikomu clan compound, chakra concealed, except for Kidomaru, who should be in the compound at this time.

"If we go through this vent, we can easily take the Beikomu clan off guard and should weaken the elders." The other two boys had disbelieving expressions on their faces, so Kidomaru explained.

"The Beikomu clan has spiders in this vent, that, while are not bound to the summoning contract, listen to the clan. These bugs use formations of webs to modify air flow, keeping the clan compound warm at night and cool during the day. If the elders are as frail as I think they are, this _should_ bring them down to an acceptable level." The fact that it was an acceptable level to kill without alerting the entire clan went without saying, but it seemed Kidomaru wouldn't be truly ready to speak about what he was doing until at least one was dead and there was no going back.

"Lead the way, Kidomaru." Orochimaru said, and Kidomaru jumped into the vent, moving down it, four Kumo Nenkin daggers slashing away at the webs that trapped heat inside of the compound. Within ten minutes, the Beikomu elders' rooms would find themselves around thirty degrees colder. As they continued down the line, the group came across splits that went four directions.

"Only one of these goes to the elders. The other three go to the infirmary, the clan sleeping compound, and the nursery. We only need to slash the ones leading to the elders' private residence." Jirobo grunted in agreement and Sakon sneered at how weak Kidomaru was acting. Orochimaru sat at the back of the group, a wicked grin observing how much Kidomaru had grown from being a kind little Beikomu to a little Itachi in the making.

The group then went down another sub-vent to one elder's residence, the fifty-something year old man who would bring Kidomaru to and from the academy, lecturing him on how much the Beikomu clan would grow prosperous from him. Upon seeing the end of the vent, a slitted little metal plate that kept the air flowing at a consistent pace, Kidomaru started to act, kicking Sakon back onto Jirobo. Using two arms and his legs to hold his position, Kidomaru quietly held the bow and an arrow in one hand while the other three pulled out some of the Kumo Nenkin daggers, quietly hacking away at the vent. Before long, a sizable enough gap was present to maneuver an arrow through. Placing the arrowhead on the gap, and testing that he could move it around a little, Kidomaru waited. Less than five minutes later, the man in the bed stirred and got out of his bed. Kidomaru wasn't an expert of human anatomy, but he knew that the Beikomu clan's weak spots weren't as clear-cut as other clans, but there was one area which all Beikomu had which could be shot to great effect.

Quietly unraveling the cloth around his third eye, Beikomu trained all three in on the man, who after walking to the door, stopped and turned, his own third eye looking around for anything wrong. Kidomaru fired. The Elder's eyes widened in surprise as the arrow pierced through the third eye, hitting the brain directly behind it. Needless to say, the man was dead. Sakon, Ukon, and Jirobo were in shock that he died so easily. Orochimaru of course, had seen this coming. He knew that the Beikomu's one glaring weakness was the fact that their skulls did not adapt well to having a third eye in the genetic code, instead their skulls formed _around_ the eye, meaning that should something destroy it, the brain would be left utterly vulnerable, assuming that the attack didn't land there anyhow.

"Kidomaru, just keep going with us right behind you. Don't think about what you've done or are going to do until we leave. We're in the middle of a mission and can't afford anyone breaking down." Sakon said, voice softening some due to the respect he now had for the archer. Kidomaru nodded and continued on his way. Making his way to the next chamber, Kidomaru found the Beikomu clan member lying in bed. Kidomaru climbed onto the bed, standing above the man. Just as the knife was about to go down, the man opened his eyes, watching as they went up in shock.

"What are you-!" A less than pretty sound came out of the man's throat, now with a large gash through it. Orochimaru eyed the door. Undoubtedly one of the elders had heard it.

"Kidomaru, how many hold the contract?" Orochimaru asked quietly.

"Six elders, the Beikomu head, and its Jonin commander." Orochimaru chuckled. It was almost as if they had their own little village here. Jonin Commander for the what, maybe ten at most Jonin in the Beikomu?

"Well, two are gone. We just have six more Beikomu to get rid of and the contract to take." Kidomaru looked at Orochimaru, voice a little duller than before.

"The Jonin commander has it, but we have to save him for last."

"Oh? Why's that?" Jirobo asked, the big fellow looking down in confusion.

"Because he will bring up more Beikomu to help him out, which could give the elders time to get away. We need to get rid of the others and _then_ kill him by any means necessary, then the contract will only be tied to me." Sakon and Ukon grinned at the darkness of his statement, and nodded.

"Each one of us will kill an elder, Sakon and Ukon counting for one. I will kill one as well. We meet in front of the Clan Head's chamber when we're done." The four addressed nodded and split their paths, following Orochimaru's orders.

Jirobo entered the room the Beikomu elder's room. The man was skinny, with short white hair and a slightly unshaven face. He had six arms, reminding Jirobo more of a spider than anything. How to get rid of a spider though? Doing hand seals, Jirobo summoned up a wall of earth and picked it up silently. The man who was about to be squashed spoke up.

"So, just who is your target?" Jirobo was initially shocked but then answered.

"The elders and clan head of the Beikomu." The elder chuckled.

"It's about time Kidokami usurped our old leader. Do as you wish with me, it shall benefit the clan." Not entirely sure what to do, but knowing he had a task, Jirobo dropped the earthen slab on his target and walked out, slightly regretting he hadn't asked who Kidokami was.

Sakon and Ukon entered the elder's room, Sakon moving towards the door, while Ukon approached the man. Merging with his body, Ukon woke the man up, but kept a hand over the shocked old man's mouth. With a wicked grin, Ukon plunged a kunai into the Beikomu, and then quickly leaving the body, and merging with Sakon, who delivered the finishing blow.

"It seems our Kekkei Genkai is leading us to victory more and more often, isn't it, brother?" Ukon asked from behind Sakon.

"Indeed it is, Ukon. Get some rest, you did well." Ukon grunted in appreciation as the twins walked away to the clan head's chamber, their task done.

Kidomaru held six knives as he entered the room, forming more Kumo Nenkin in his mouth but keeping it somewhat liquidized. Placing himself several feet above the man, Kidomaru spat out the Kumo Nenkin over the man's mouth and nose, waking him up with a start but rendering it impossible for noise to get out. Kidomaru flung four of the six knives, essentially keeping him bound to the bed through his wrists and ankles. Mouth snarling at anger at this elder, who was the one to suggest the harsh training for him in the first place. Kidomaru jumped down and ended him. Strangely, the young Beikomu felt more… Liberated by this man's falling than the others. He had heard the noise of Jirobo's jutsu though, and so he knew that at least one of his compatriots had done his job.

Orochimaru felt no hesitation as he simply walked into this room. Orochimaru had escaped the Sandaime's judgement the banishment from the leaf village, survived and beaten Jiraiya in his Sennin Modo form, not to mention survive Hanzo of the Salamander's dreaded assault. Orochimaru was a man that had seen Mangekyo Sharingan, Rinnegan, numerous Kekkei Genkai, dead shinobi with darkened sclera, and was an S-rank criminal and probably had the finest network of outposts to find talent in. Orochimaru was, however, slightly confused by the fact that he could hear music coming from the other side.

The song that the Snake-man heard was sad, and multiple instruments were being played. It reminded Orochimaru a little bit of Itachi, and the intrigue that surrounded him. It was the type of music Orochimaru thought would be most fitting at a funeral, or a revelation, or something wise… Needless to say, Orochimaru was drawn in, to find a woman wearing a Kimono, six arms playing instruments as she sung in the night.

"Greetings, Denetsu no Sannin no Orochimaru." The room had a smell of burning incense, and candles burning red flames were all around its circular design. In the center, a table sat low, with Sake poured into a cup and the woman's Takigakure Hitai-ate lying there, facing the Sannin member.

"Sit, drink. We have much to discuss, you and I." Orochimaru was a tad unnerved that someone was able to withstand his presence completely, but took it in stride and sat down, sniffing the Sake for poison. None was present. Drinking a sip, he looked at the woman, who appeared no older than forty at most. She had long, dark hair that trailed down her back, and her third eye was open for the world to see. Her six arms continued playing the sad, mystic tune.

"So what do you wish to discuss, Beikomu Elder?"

"If my suspicion is correct, you intend to have Beikomu Kidomaru join you, and depart this village. Given that you've only killed elders so far, should I assume you are promoting Kidokami to clan leader, or should I assume you are taking him and the contract with you?" Orochimaru's eyes narrowed at the second possibility.

"I had no clue such a shrewd kunoichi was living in this clan of conceit." She gave a soft laugh, a quiet thing that vanished almost as soon as in entered the air around her.

"You'll find a lot of things can surprise you, Orochimaru-san. As much as I wish for little Kidomaru-kun to have freedom, I would loathe for it to be freedom under a demon like yourself." Orochimaru bristled slightly, but regained his composure, preparing his most honeyed voice possible.

"And what would make you say that, dear Beikomu Elder?" She looked at the room where Kidomaru was undoubtedly slaying another of her compatriots.

"I would rather send him to a leader that isn't an international S-ranked criminal, isn't someone who will throw away his shinobi like pawns, and I'd rather have a shinobi that was actually human…" Orochimaru was internally shocked. Did this woman know about his snake form too? Just who was she?

"Well, no matter who you are, it won't seem you'll get very far with that. I am, after all, an S-ranked criminal. You won't last long." The Beikomu woman sighed and sung her song again, though this time something was… Different. Her voice had more sadness and regret, and Orochimaru found himself standing in a rainy field, the same one that he had faced Hanzo with his teammates in. From the sky, Orochimaru saw that woman's third eye, light radiating from it as it tore through the heavens to observe the battlefield. Turning away, Orochimaru surveyed his surroundings.

Looking around, Orochimaru found Jiraiya, and saw images of their fight three years ago.

The sights of the ground being smashed before his sage mode, the ground being charred and scorched with his fires as the woman watched from the sidelines… Fire… The Uchiha clan were the most prominent in Katon ninjutsu.

Orochimaru saw Itachi now, when he was younger, when Orochimaru saw his Kunai jutsu for the first time. Only this time, Orochimaru saw Itachi turn around with Mangekyo in his eyes, and Orochimaru saw Itachi glaring at him, and saw an image of red clouds... What did this mean? Orochimaru had never seen red clouds in his life... And the woman's music stronger than ever… Orochimaru knew this _had_ to be a genjutsu, and that song she sang and played was setting him right up for it! He could still hear it in his ears, sounding more beautiful and more depressing than ever. Just… What was this woman?

Kidomaru, Jirobo, and the Sakon/Ukon twins met up in front of the clan head's personal chamber.

"Kidomaru-san, how strong is this guy?" Kidomaru turned towards Jirobo and answered.

"His Kumo Nenkin can change between fluid and solid at his command, meaning that he can make a sword, turn it into something more flexible like a whip, and trap you with it, but that's not why he's feared. He has immense physical strength, Until Orochimaru-sama comes here, we won't be able to kill this guy." Sakon gulped and his eyes widened.

"Indeed you won't be able to kill me, but on the other hand, I'll be _more_ than able to kill _you_." From behind Sakon, the Beikomu clan head stood. Nearing six feet tall, he sported a bushy mustache and large eyes. His hair looked a bit like an angled pineapple, and his arms were burly and strong-looking. Overall, the giant was a terrifying sight to behold. Quickly jumping together, the three figures faced the giant. Sakon nudged Jirobo as Ukon started emerging from his brother. Jirobo didn't need any more warnings.

"Doton: Doryuheki!" A wall appeared, blocking their sight from the big man as Ukon hid away with a transformation.

"Kumo Nenkin: Jaberin no Hyo!" A hail of javelins made from Beikomu spider secretion smashed through the wall, and the three visible opponents of the clan leader jumped away. Jirobo quickly brought up another wall.

"Is this all you've got? I didn't know your new friends were so weak, Kidomaru!" Said Beikomu took the bow he had and drew not one, but three arrows ready to fire as soon as he emerged, the young six-armed boy knew that the clan head would probably break through this wall as a show of intimidation. Kidomaru's instincts were correct.

"How useless!" With one arm, the Beikomu clan head smashed through the wall. Jirobo quickly jumped back, and within a second the arrows flew from Kidomaru's bow. One burrowed itself in the burly man's shoulder, another in his thigh, and the other was about to hit his head… Until the Beikomu leader allowed his hand to absorb the blow, not even flinching as the arrow's head came out the other side of his hand. Kidomaru's eyes widened. Was this the power he was up against?

Immediately, Ukon jumped from where he had been hiding, allowing his body to merge with the Beikomu leader. Turning to see Ukon's face, the six-armed giant raised an eyebrow.

"So what the hell are you supposed to be?"

"My body's Kekkei Genkai allows me to merge with whatever I choose on a cellular level, and soon enough your body's cells will convert to mine, and you will die!" The spider man laughed.

"So your body is stuck with mine, and mine to yours?" Ukon nodded.

"Well then, how does your body handle what mine can?" Almost immediately, Ukon screamed as his skin started burning. Retreating into his elder brother's form, Ukon breathed a sigh of relief. Kidomaru fired off several more arrows into the Beikomu clan leader, the arm with his injured hand taking all of the hits.

"Really, Kidomaru. Your arrows can't even properly pierce my flesh, and the spider poison that amplifies my Kumo Nenkin punishes such a _unique_ kekkei genkai your allies possess. What else do you have? Is Fatso here something useful, like a _true_ prodigy, or a Jinchuriki? If not… You and your little friends' journey ends here." Jirobo rushed in front of Kidomaru, Sakon, and Ukon, crossing his arms in a shield. The Beikomu clan leader grabbed him and tossed him like a ragdoll. Kidomaru's eyes narrowed as he nocked arrows one at a time and fired them off. The Beikomu clan head allowed the arrows to pierce him, taking almost no visible damage from the strikes. He then reached Sakon and Ukon, and separated them into their own bodies. He threw Ukon into a wall and slammed Sakon onto his knee before flinging him on top of his twin.

The Beikomu head then turned towards Kidomaru, a glint that screamed death in his eye...

"Your road ends here, you worthless child!" He reached out, but then stopped as his eyes widened. Kidomaru looked and saw a sword sticking through the Beikomu clan leader's chest, and behind him was a pale face with long black hair, golden eyes with slits for pupils, and purple marks coming from his eyes. Orochimaru-sama had returned…

"Not quite, Beikomu-sama." Orochimaru jerked the sword a little bit, causing a groan of pain from his target. "I have a question for you, and you will answer. Before she died, one of the elders asked me to stop Beikomu Kidokami's scheme. Who is this Kidokami?" Kidomaru answered for his slightly pained clan leader.

"Kidokami-niisan is the Jonin Commander of the Beikomu…" Orochimaru chuckled darkly.

"Wait, the elder that I killed said it was about time Kidokami did his coup. Is he planning to become clan head…?" The Beikomu leader coughed up blood before speaking.

"That bastard… was planning… to overthrow me…? What a wasted… child…" The leader's final word was pushed before he collapsed, undeniably dead. Orochimaru withdrew his sword before turning towards the exit of the elders' chambers, a pathway which would eventually lead to the center of the Beikomu compound, a courtyard perfect for sparring.

"Kidomaru-kun, isn't Beikomu Kidokami the last user of the summoning contract?" Orochimaru eyed Kidomaru now, who seemed to be holding himself together for the time being, no doubt a result of his newfound camaraderie with Jirobo, Sakon, and Ukon.

"Hai, Kidokami-niisan is the last wielder, and luckily I ran across the contract on my way here. We just have to get rid of him and then make our escape." For proof, Kidomaru held up a large scroll before tying it around his back. The group nodded and ran towards the central plaza and more specifically its courtyard, where they temporarily rested.

"Will anyone be with Kidokami-kun when we schedule his death?" Kidomaru paused before nodding slowly.

"Well, Kidokami-niisan has two bodyguards. The first one is his cousin and best friend, Kidotsuchi. He is tall, and given a few years, he could be as physically powerful as the clan leader in his prime. You'll recognize him by his height, powerful physical stature, Mohawk hair, and lines of ink from each eye that end in points, making it look like he's crying orange paint. His second is his otuoto Kidorai, who is smaller and lankier, but he's powerful at range. He has a long, thin ponytail and is extremely good with ranged weapons like javalins, senbon, and Fuuma Shuriken. If you don't see his hair or his weapons, he has a nose ring and trails of prayer kanji going from his temples all the way around his face to the edges of his mouth." Orochimaru laughed.

"They're all so young, and yet so powerful? How did they become Jonin commander and his bodyguards? The elder I killed spoke of Kidokami planning a coup, is he _really_ that strong?" Kidomaru hesitated.

"As of right now, I think the three of them combined are way more powerful than the clan head, even with a couple of the elders helping him. Give Kidokami a couple of years, each one of them could be stronger than our former leader." Sakon and Ukon looked at each other and Jirobo eyed the ground, thinking about what a monster the clan head was. The primary difference was that there were three enemies, a short ranged bodyguard who had impressive physical prowess like the clan head, a long ranged specialist who could use a variety of different weapons, and the Beikomu Jonin commander, a man who wielded the summoning contract, and given that he was the Jonin commander, had to be stronger than his bodyguards. This fight could be even worse than the others. It really didn't help that after the introduction, a few dark chuckles were heard from above.

"What a nice introduction for us, wouldn't you agree, Nii-niisan, Ō-niisan?" Biggest brother? And introduction, could that mean…?

"I would agree, San-otuoto. And after all, they've been waiting for so long, and if my sensing skills are accurate, they've killed off all of the elders."

Three Beikomu clansmen sat, each one with the 'gifted' six-armed trait. The one in front was small and lanky, with a ponytail and several javelins ready to throw. The one on the left was a big man with orange ink coming from his eyes and a large broadsword in his hands, and he stood between the Beikomu in front and the Beikomu in the back. Finally, the third was of average size with some muscle, but not a lot, and had darker skin than his brothers, and had no visible weapons, instead stood with his eyes closed except for his third eye, and two of his arms were crossed as he leaned back against the wall.

"Quite true, Nii-otuoto. Let's not keep these poor wretches waiting to go to the afterlife, no? After all, we should at least do Orochimaru of the Sannin the honor of killing his pawns before facing him in battle…" The 'second brother' jumped down and smashed the ground, Kidotsuchi if Kidomaru's information was accurate. Standing in the small crater with his huge weapon in hand, Kidotsuchi took a defensive position and allowed Kidorai to jump in front of the two of them, javelins ready to fire but opening his mouth as wide as he could, and pointing the chamber at Jirobo. Jirobo ran through hand seals and forced a Doryuheki to emerge, and not a second too late. Kidorai fired out hundreds of Kumo Nenkin within a few seconds, the needles having enough piercing power to do heavy damage to the wall.

In response, Jirobo moved back several times to make more walls which were much larger, until…

"Huuuooooaaaaah!" Kidotsuchi spun himself around like a top, broadsword slicing through wall after wall like a hot knife through butter, and when he reached the frightened children Orochimaru stepped in with his sword, engaging Kidotsuchi in a brief fight. That fight was resolved when Kidotsuchi, seeing Orochimaru's neck extend, jumped back and to the side with surprising speed as Kidorai fired off needles once more, their rate of fire growing significantly faster.

Orochimaru took all of the needles and collapsed in a heap on the ground. For a few seconds there was silence until Kidorai started laughing and Kidotsuchi got his broadsword ready to strike again, a mirthful expression on his face. As Kidorai and Kidotsuchi approached the corpse, Kidokami opened his normal eyes and stepped into a battle position.

"Rai, Tsuchi, get away from that body! He's not dead!" When the two heard him, they immediately jumped back, as Orochimaru's 'corpse' opened its mouth and the man slithered out again, completely unharmed.

"Kukukuku, I never imagined that the three of you would be so strong, especially you, Jonin Commander Beikomu Kidokami. The three of you can't be older than twenty-five, what are whelps like you doing running about, guessing the secrets of my technique?" Kidokami's smile that he had worn throughout the battle soured, as he realized that his ascension would have to wait.

"Rai, Tsuchi, I suggest you use your combination technique to end this one. Jirobo, Sakon, and Ukon backed up quickly, and Kidomaru repositioned himself to a higher vantage point, trying to understand the technique. Kidotsuchi quickly formed a snake seal, and soon a steady stream of soil was ripping itself from the ground behind them, forming a larger version of Kidotsuchi's broadsword. Kidorai flashed through hand seals, and a steady flow of electricity amassed itself further above. Watching, Orochimaru noticed the sheen of metal in some of the soil – Were they channeling electricity to the sword above?

As Orochimaru was about to react, Kidotsuchi shoved his broadsword into the ground, and Kidorai formed a ram seal. Kidokami held a meditative pose, and watched Orochimaru like a hawk.

"You know, Orochimaru…" Kidokami said to the Sannin, who turned a lazy eye towards the young leader.

"This soil and technique were designed for executing the clan head, and he was much stronger than you." Orochimaru smirked.

"Clearly not, if he's dead and I'm still-"

"JUSTICE!" Kidotsuchi shouted, and jammed the sword into the ground. Kidomaru saw his opening, and nocked an arrow, using what little chakra he retained, not knowing Kidorai was watching his every move. Pumping all of the chakra he could into the arrow, Kidomaru released it, watching as it pierced Kidotsuchi through the heart. As the giant fell and Kidokami looked alarmed, Kidorai took his chance, and redirected the lightning-infused blade into his eldest sworn brother. Kidokami's eyes were wide with shock, and Kidomaru's head was beginning to spin in confusion. Kidorai just killed Kidokami!

"Rai… What…!" Kidorai knelt in front of Kidokami.

"You know, old friend, I wasn't planning on killing you until I was powerful enough to take on the duties of managing the clan… Unfortunately, I had little to no choice, old sport. You either had to die now, or I would die before my ambition could be met. It's… Nothing personal. I'll ensure your funeral is the most honorable of all." Kidokami looked with shock and betrayal towards his murderer, as the last of his life ebbed away. For a moment, or perhaps a small eternity, Kidorai stood, looking towards Orochimaru.

"Orochimaru, I have a proposition for you." Orochimaru laughed haughtily.

"You're not in a position to negotiate, boy, but I'll hear you out nonetheless." Kidorai pointed towards his fallen brothers.

"As you can no doubt see, all of the power of the Beikomu clan has been liquidated. Your people have killed our elders, and through a lucky twist of fate, my eventual task of murdering Kidokami has been completed. As things stand, I am undoubtedly the next in line to succeed the clan – there is no one else who can compare to the level of power I wield within our internal affairs. Should you leave me alive tonight, I will not only pretend I never saw any of you, but will blame someone of your choosing for the murder of my superiors." Orochimaru licked his lips – this young one drove a hard bargain…

"Say it was a coalition of shinobi from Amegakure, Hoshigakure, and Kusagakure, and that it was led by Uchiha Itachi." Kidorai bowed low in thanks, before moving out of the way.

"Thank you, Orochimaru-sama. I will not betray this promise." Orochimaru laughed as he and his subordinates walked out, never to return to Takigakure.

 **Recap: Former Jinchuriki is member of the Hizen clan, which means he's somehow related to Takano, exact relation unknown. Former Jinchuriki has a fake name too – Zhang Takataki.**

 **Fuu arranges one of the secrets of the apartment correctly, meets former Jinchuriki, who uses an Uchiha hypnosis jutsu in order to access Chomei. The two discuss stories(the backstory discussed here is important – it shows WHO the former Jinchuriki is a walking reference to), former Jinchuriki disappears into oblivion.**

 **Kidomaru meets Jirobo & Sakon/Ukon. They, along with Orochimaru, slaughter the elders, clan head, and two of the upcoming shinobi of the Beikomu clan who were planning a coup. The third offers his political influence in exchange for his life, which Orochimaru accepts. Kusagakure, Amegakure, and Hoshigakure have been framed for the slaughter of the higher-ups in the Beikomu clan.**

 **Again, sorry for the obliteratingly long delay.**

 **~KoS**

 **P.S: Bonus points for anyone who can recognize who Kidotsuchi is a reference to, and the first person who can find out who Takataki is a reference to gets to help design a chapter and/or a plot point of my choosing.**


	7. Chapter 7: A New Order

**Hi all. I finished this chapter earlier this week, but I was unable to upload this because I had no internet connection. I was out of town.**

 **I'm sorry that this took so long, and if anyone has any suggestions/ideas, send them to me. I check reviews and PMs, so contact me using either of those.**

 **Without further ado, thanks and good day (Or rather, night?)**

 **~KoS**

* * *

Shino's aimless wandering of the streets of Konoha was interrupted by small fangs biting into his leg. Looking down, he saw Akamaru, Kiba's dog. Behind his glasses, Shino blinked. What was Kiba's dog doing messing with him? Crouching at the small white animal, he noticed Akamaru would run away, then turn around, look back at Shino, and run back, wagging his tail excitedly.

Perplexed, Shino followed the dog as he walked away again, and Akamaru went further. Continuing to follow, Shino's mind ran through numerous possibilities – perhaps Kiba was pranking him? Shino had noticed a strange closeness between him and the resident prankster of Konoha, so the idea couldn't be entirely ruled out. That being said, they were also close friends with Shikamaru and Choji, both of whom seemed too unlikely to be involved due to laziness and kindness, respectively.

" _That being said"_ Shino thought to himself, " _they're also friends of Sasuke's_." Shino then realized that Sasuke also had no bone to pick with the young Aburame, given his status as a cold, calculated elite, and Sasuke was also the son of the police chief – why would someone like that risk getting his father involved by proxy? Therefore, Shino reasoned, this was not a prank.

That being said, why would Akamaru be without Kiba? Perhaps he was lost, Shino reasoned. Therefore, he followed Akamaru, who led him not only out of the shinobi district he was used to, but to some of the more wild parts of the village, and finally, to a wild park outside of the main village, which Shino could easily access due to his clan status. When walking in with Akamaru, he noticed the dog whined sadly, and Shino knelt down. He noticed the dog walked to his side and growled at the forest menacingly.

Shino asked a quick question to the dog;

"Do you understand human speech, Akamaru?" The dog turned back towards Shino, tail wagging happily as he yipped a few times.

"Is there something out there, Akamaru?" The dog whined sadly and nodded.

"Don't move, I am sending my insects to scout." Though not terribly proficient with manipulating the hive mind of his insects, Shino could use a _few_ insects to scout out an area, and at least confirm something was there, and where it was. As Shino sat near his classmate's puppy while watching a dozen insects scuttle into the trees, he asked one more question.

"Does Kiba know where you are?" The dog turned around, sniffed, and nodded happily, touching Shino with his paw five times.

"Is he five minutes away?" The dog shook his head, and tapped his paw five times again.

"Are you trying to tell me something?" The dog nodded, doing the tap again.

"Is it… the number of people?" The dog nodded, and Shino could easily guess who would be with Kiba on such endeavors.

"Allow me to guess – it's Inuzuka Kiba, Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke, Nara Shikamaru, and Akimichi Choji?" The dog nodded happily, and went towards the edge of the forest, waiting for his owner. Immediately before he turned back towards the mystery in the forest, he felt the deaths of several insects through the hive mind, and what's worse, he could tell how they died – they were burnt by... _something_ at such temperatures they evaporated instantly – and the insects seemingly weren't burnt to death intentionally. Whatever was in there was very warm, but did not seem to notice his insects - it was passively destroying them. He could also tell it was about one hundred meters away, but was hiding. Shino could also tell based on where the insects died… The 'thing' was about the size of a fully grown human, yet no signs of it were visible.

The fact that it was invisible, was passively killing his scout insects, and was alarming a shinobi hound, even if said hound was a puppy, meant one thing - a shinobi was somewhere in these woods, and not a friendly one. Shino by nature was not someone who was easily alarmed. Coming from a clan of calm, collected introverts, Shino instead used his time to plan effectively. If there was a shinobi of unknown power here in these woods, a good idea would be finding reinforcements. With Shino's insects and Kiba and Akamaru's combined senses, they could keep eyes and noses on the shinobi's location while the others ran away to alert the Hokage or any other shinobi they passed.

Confident with his plan, Shino instructed the remaining scout insects to form a perimeter around the shinobi, as Shino turned away, walking towards Akamaru, and saw five misfits heading his way.

"Shino, you ass! Why did you take Akamaru?" Shino rubbed his temples.

"Kiba, Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru, Choji, please sit down." The five looked skeptical, and Kiba was not taking it.

"Shino, answer my question! I'm warning you…" Shikamaru placed a hand on Kiba's shoulder and shook his head when the Inuzuka turned to him, and the six boys sat down. Shikamaru gestured for Shino to speak.

"Akamaru led me here, and once I inspected the area with my insects, found the presence of what I believe is an unknown shinobi. I would advise several of us stay here and monitor his position while the rest find the Hokage, the Police Chief, and any other shinobi in the proximity to apprehend him." Shikamaru looked skeptically, and focused in on Shino.

"Why do you think it's a non-Konoha shinobi, you troublesome classmate of mine?" Shino looked at Shikamaru.

"Three reasons – firstly, Akamaru led me here from the shinobi district of the town. The fact that he can smell something from all the way over there that is unique in comparison to Konoha's thousands of other scents is concerning. Secondly, when I sent insects to scout where this unknown person was, I found they were one hundred meters away from my position at that time, and this person was hiding in the forest, completely invisible." By now, Shikamaru was looking invested in the idea. Naruto and Sasuke looked scared, and Choji and Kiba looked positively mortified.

"Thirdly, several insects I sent out were burnt to death… And yet we can't see any sign of extreme heat." Shikamaru nursed his head, undoubtedly from a head-splitting pain. Waiting for the young genius to speak, Shino ensured the figure hadn't moved by maintaining connection with his insects.

"Were they burnt to death by a fire-based heat, or something like lightning, steam, lava, or maybe a scorch of some kind, Shino?" Sasuke asked, as the Aburame nodded.

"Shino I have a few things to tell you. Firstly, you're troublesome, but… I'm glad you told us, and I'm glad you listened to Akamaru, but there are three issues with your plan – firstly, even if it's the shinobi way to complete a mission, we don't leave each other behind. Naruto's already taken one for the team and risked his tail end to get out safely, and I'd rather we not have to do that again. Secondly, there's no guarantee this guy'll simply let us leave, bring other shinobi, and return. Thirdly, if we leave here, we get in trouble because we know about this guy in here and didn't tell anyone. Therefore… We all have to stay, or at least stay until someone else shows up. Every single one of us, and do _something_ , even if it's just to gain attention. We're also not ready for this in the slightest – none of us have ever been part of an actual shinobi battle."

From the shadows, the unknown figure watched the children talking. The one who had been subtly sending out insects had to be an Aburame, and now that the man watched, he could see signs of other clan children – the unique hairstyle of the Nara clan, the rotundness of the Akimichi, and the human-canine bond of the Inuzuka clan were all visible. The raven-haired one wore an Uchiha symbol on his back too, but the other child…

"Shikamaru, I put some of the stuff we put in Ami's kitchen in these little ball-things, I could throw them in there-ttebayo…" Shikamaru turned towards Naruto, eyeing the spheres, noticing Sasuke's face turning green.

"I don't even want to ask how you found empty, military-grade smoke bombs, Naruto… It'll just make this situation worse." Naruto shrugged, smiling, momentarily forgetting about the threat at hand.

The shinobi zeroed in on the blond-haired child, and felt a burning sensation in his gut. The spiky hair, baby blue eyes, and relatively light skin were all too familiar to the shinobi – this child looked like a reincarnation of the Fourth Hokage – all of the physical features screamed of a possible connection between the two.

Shikamaru looked at Kiba.

"Kiba, can you smell any scents apart from ours?" Kiba nodded, and looked behind him.

"The smell that's similar to you is further back, probably watching us." Shikamaru grinned and pulled out his shogi board and a small piece of paper. After pulling out a small pencil, he scrawled a message and pulled out some pawns and a queen. Arraying the pawns similar to how his group of friends were sitting, he asked Shino and Kiba for information about the unknown shinobi and similar scent's location. Placing the enemy queen piece corresponding to the location, and the allied bishop at the corner opposite, showing the pawns in the middle, Shikamaru placed his note next to the board, and instructed the group to slowly back up, while instructing Shino and Kiba to be his eyes and ears for the unknowns. Right as they were about to leave fully, Kiba notified Shikamaru that the 'familiar scent' was moving towards the board.

Shikamaru laughed, and told his friends to follow him.

"It's getting kinda late, lets get some food. Anyone know a good place we can go?" Choji nodded.

"My family always makes a ton of food around dinnertime. We'll have more than enough for the six of us." Noticing that Naruto and Sasuke seemed a little bit against the idea, he turned towards them.

"My father's very strict about when I return, but I think we should be fine if we get to your house and eat quickly…" The group turned to Naruto next.

"Adults… don't like me. I don't know why, either. I haven't pranked most of them, or even treated em wrong, but they really don't like me-ttebayo." Choji looked strangely at Naruto, noticing the blond's eyes were wandering.

"Don't worry, Naruto. As long as you don't treat him badly, Dad will be nice." Seeming appeased, Naruto and Sasuke joined the other four, as Choji led the way to the Akimichi clan house.

Even entering the fairly large clan leader's house, one could smell the wafts of great food, and a large man stepped nearby, looking and smiling down at Choji before looking at his friends.

"Oh! I had no idea that you were bringing your friends, Choji!" The young Akimichi apologized, but Choza waved it off, choosing instead to introduce himself.

"My name is Akimichi Choza, clan head of the Akimichi. Could you all introduce yourselves?" They did so, with Naruto hesitantly introducing himself at the end.

"Oh, I think I've seen some of your handiwork!" Naruto felt crushed – he was about to be judged by his pranking again, he knew it…

"It's exceptional how you could do so much in so little time! If that's how strong you are as an academy student, you'll become a splendid shinobi down the road." With that, Choza sent the boys up to Choji's room, while he and his wife made dinner.

Naruto was shocked. Perhaps people like the Akimichi would treat him better than he usually was…

The boys entered Choji's room - moderately sized, with a bed, table, and numerous cookbooks, clan texts, and shinobi books lining the walls. As they all took seats down on the bed, or in Naruto's case, the chair at Choji's desk, Naruto gave an idea.

"You know guys, in most of my pranks I get caught. What if we made us, our group, an actual pranking squad? We could take Konoha's news by storm!" Shikamaru rolled his eyes, but Kiba was hooked.

"Yeah dude! We could have like… our own symbol!" Said Kiba, pointing at Naruto

"And we could spray it on our prank sites!" Said Naruto, arms in the air.

"This is a troublesome idea…" Said Shikamaru, as Choji inquired why.

"Two reasons – firstly, Naruto is known as the biggest prankster in Konoha, and all of us are from major clans. This would be almost impossible because of the reputation of Naruto, and the risks of us being caught. Secondly, who would we prank? We pranked Ami out of a common goal, but we don't necessarily have anyone else…" Shino took this moment to add his two cents as well.

"Plus, I'm not in your group, so if you want something that I'll be involved in, let's make a primary focus that isn't pranks…" Choji seemed to back this model, and brought up a point.

"You know, I remember the Hokage told us that he only did well because of his friends…" The others nodded – every once in a while the Sandaime would show up, give a few lectures on work ethic and friendship or read his poetry. Naruto immediately perked up.

"So what would happen if I became the Hokage and we all became super-Jonin?" Kiba immediately protested, stating that he would be Hokage, but Shino, Shikamaru, and Sasuke all thought about that.

"You know, if we do make a group of some kind, having control of the entire village through one of our members would be interesting." Sasuke nodded.

"My clan always tries to pass legislature to increase the powers of the Uchiha police, yet others keep blocking them – I don't think the Hokage would suffer the same issue."

"If our group wants legitimacy, we'll need to work our way up to the highest office, that's because we seek approval." Shino said, agreeing with the idea.

"So how exactly are we going to make this group _successful_?" Shikamaru's question remained unanswered, but his friends attempted to find answers.

"Ask our parents how groups of ninja are successful?" Possibly, but Shiakmaru knew that no ninja worth his salt would let a question like that slide without investigation, parent or not.

"By combining our best jutsu! If we can surpass the Yondaime Hokage, anything is possible!" Shikamaru mentally dismissed Naruto's suggestion – there was absolutely no substance to it.

"Logically, we must see how animals in the wild act, so that we can imitate those strategies which are successful." Shino had an interesting take, but it would be time-consuming, and too many variables couldn't be controlled.

"My sister Hana is going into the Chunin exams soon, we might be able to see how actual ninja act." Of all of the people who would have a solution, Shikamaru wouldn't have necessarily expected Kiba, but it was a welcome surprise nonetheless.

"I like Kiba's idea." Said Sasuke, with Shino nodding, apparently conceding Kiba's idea as superior.

"How are we all going to get in though, ttebayo?" Shikamaru did some quick thinking.

"Choji and I are good friends – I could head over with him and his dad, or he could go with me and my parents. Shino, I could probably convince the adults to drag you along too…" Shikamaru closed his eyes, thinking. Not for the first time, his friends were amazed at his level of thinking.

"Sasuke, aren't your brother and Shisui friends?" Sasuke nodded.

"Good. Then you can go with Itachi, and convince him to bring Shisui and Naruto. Kiba, since your sister is _in_ the tournament, you should have no trouble convincing your parents to let you go. When is the actual exam?" Kiba struggled to remember.

"Next week. I think it's around noon? Anyhow, you'd want to be there early anyway. Let's all get approval soon. I wanna start this group up!" With that, the boys headed downstairs, choosing to eat. While everyone got seated and served themselves food, Shikamaru observed his friends, thinking about the strengths they brought to the table.

Kiba had very good sensory abilities, especially in conjunction with Akamaru. Kiba would also be very useful in ensuring any pranks or ditchings that went down weren't tracked too easily, presuming the Hokage didn't show up. He was very ambitious and always wanted the lead, but that _could_ be a useful feature of his self, if it led him to look after subordinates. Maybe if their group started to grow, he could be a minor leader. That being said, Kiba was also boisterous and easily angered, meaning he could cause issues for their plans if things started going awry.

Shino was analytical, but very reserved. Like Kiba, he could be quite a sensory shinobi if he honed his wide-ranging skills with his insects. That being said, his moral compass seemed to be screwed on a little too tight – Shikamaru doubted he was interested in pranks, as he adhered very strictly to logic. This meant that he could be good at thinking up plans, but only if he saw the logic behind them. If Shino were to make plans, he probably wouldn't be the best in a group – he seemed to work best on his own.

Choji was easily frightened and wasn't a fighter, but Shikamaru knew it was because his rotund friend was far too kind. Choji had the potential to have the rawest physical strength of their current group, if his father was any guiding light to how strong he could be. In a battle, Choji seemed the type of person to take as many hits for his friends as need be, but the kind Akimichi wasn't a leader – he was more content following his friends' plans than actively taking part in the process.

Sasuke was, at least in theory, a liability. His father was the head of the police department, and too many people close to him were high on the command chain. That being said, the Uchiha were known for producing top-quality ninja, and if Itachi was any indicator, Sasuke had a _lot_ of potential for his shinobi talents.

Naruto seemed like the smallest member of their group, but Shikamaru felt that he could have the most potential for leadership ability – his place of birth was a fairly dilapidated area, and Shikamaru knew from the time he had looked around Naruto's apartment that he lived with both humility and frugality. Naruto had an iron will, a cunning mind, and could easily be tempered into leadership material. Shikamaru himself knew he didn't want to be the leader, but Naruto had potential. That being said, their group needed a few things…

 _ **Later that week**_ …

Shikamaru Nara was in the library. Normally, the lazy child wouldn't even think to stop by such a place, but now was the prime time to learn more about any jutsu that could help this group assemble. On his left, Choji poured over books about the geography surrounding the village – any space that could be used for their base of operations could be useful. To his right, Shino sat, reading books about military, generals, chains of command, and anything else that could be useful.

At Shikamaru's request, Sasuke had gone to Uchiha Shisui and requested that his cousin (without Naruto's knowledge) teach the young Uzumaki about leadership, organization, and planning. Sasuke himself had started studying what he could about the Kyuubi Incident and the Yondaime Hokage – Shikamaru knew that Naruto was born on that day, he had strange whiskers, and the entire village treated him unfairly, and there had to be a connection. Thus, Sasuke had been sent there by the chief strategist of the group.

Kiba was looking through codes of morality that the Inuzuka and other major clans used in order to help make a constitution for their group – if they were going to be effective, they _needed_ guidelines. A set of rules was the first step to that.

"Hey Shika?" Choji turned towards the young Nara.

"Yeah?"

"There's this, uh, mountain near the village we could use." Shikamaru was interested.

"Why should we use a mountain outside of the village?" Choji moved the book towards his best friend.

"Look here; it was named 'O no Yama' (Mountain of Tails) after the Kyuubi incident… Perhaps there's a connection between that and the place." Shikamaru frowned.

"Any mountain caught in the Kyuubi's rampage would have been flattened though, wouldn't it?" Choji nodded.

"That's why I'm so confused about it. This could be a good place for our meeting grounds." Shikamaru nodded, but told Choji to continue searching for anything that could be useful.

"Shikamaru, I've found some jutsu. I believe they will work with Choji's suggestion fairly well, as long as we find a cave or an enclosed area…" Shikamaru looked interested.

"Let's investigate it sometime, preferably with the others." Shikamaru said, as his friends nodded.

The next day was the start of the Chunin exams final round.

As luck turned out, only Shikamaru, Kiba, and Choji were able to get in – Shino had clan affairs, to deal with, Sasuke and Naruto were working on a designs and costumes for their group. Because of that, tasks were split up into three categories – Kiba would view ally to ally interactions, Choji would view ally to enemy interactions, and Shikamaru would take notes on battle tactics.

At Naruto's apartment, the young Uzumaki and Uchiha sat with half a dozen masks, several cans of paint, brushes, and cloaks. After an hour of painting, eating ramen, and making paint bombs with the leftover, they looked at their handiwork – the cloaks, with black exterior and blood-red interior sat with a pale white decorated mask lying on each one.

Naruto's mask had red claw marks reminiscent of his whiskers, and was originally designed from a kitsune mask.

Sasuke's was originally a warlord mask in a play, but had red circles drawn around its eyes, and the helmet itself was night black.

Kiba's mask was designed from a crocodile, but had red trails coming from the edges of its maw, making it look like a ravenous beast.

Shino's mask had red pincers and eyebrows, and was originally an insect's mask. Very little emotion was visible.

Choji's mask was a large bear-based thing, with paint used to create a warlike expression, with an enraged reddening of the cheeks.

Shikamaru's mask had a ghostly face on it, reminiscent of the fairy tales they had heard as children, about a phantom horseman who would arrive, slaughter many, and return to the land from whence he came.

Once the Chunin exams were done, the five who were able to would start setting up their base in the O no Yama, thus keeping themselves prepared for a larger setup of a base.

Collecting their masks and robes in several bags, Sasuke and Naruto headed to the mountain, finding themselves at its base in a fairly short amount of time. Scouting around the area, they found a strange-looking cave, with doused torches, a well-constructed interior, what looked like a block of stone that was about as tall as Naruto, and seemed to have the horizontal dimensions of an adult human lying down. On the top of the stone, the higarana for 'Ku' sat, with what looked like two other scratched out higarana. This strange cave also had bloodstains on the ground. Though mildly disturbed by the blood, Sasuke and Naruto reasoned that perhaps animals had fought here, or something like that.

Luckily, the robes and masks weren't the only things Naruto and Sasuke brought with them – in a scroll  
sat several closets, eight chairs, and two desks, bought from a woman who Sasuke refered to as 'Nekobaa'. Arranging the eight chairs in a circle around the large stone keeping and masks and cloaks together inside one closet, they kept the other one stored, and placed the desks next to the walls of the cave.

Once they set up, Sasuke returned to Konoha, with the intent of getting the others, and seeing if Shino could help out. Naruto returned to his apartment, and to his surprise, found Shisui Uchiha waiting for him inside.

"Naruto!"

"Shisui-sensei? I didn't know we had training today…" Shisui shook his head.

"Your sensei in the academy says you've been working hard recently, and I haven't seen many of your pranks recently, so I figured you deserve a reward." Naruto's ears perked up, and he clapped his hands excitedly. Deciding that ice cream was the desired reward, Shisui walked his student to the stand.

"So, Naruto, I've heard that you're making some powerful friends." Naruto nodded, choosing to keep his little group's more secret matters, namely their goals, robes, masks, and uniforms secret.

"I have friends, but what do you mean by powerful? We're all still academy students, ttebayo." Shisui laughed.

"Almost all of your friends have powerful connections – your young Nara, Akimichi, and Aburame friends are the heirs to their clans, and both Sasuke and your Inuzuka friend are also children of clan heads." Naruto shrugged. Although Naruto knew this to be true, he didn't really comprehend the consequences of who his friends were.

"Hey Shisui-sensei?" Shisui turned towards Naruto.

"Why did you choose me to be your student?" Shisui's eyes turned towards the Hokage monument and glazed over slightly, as if he was going through memories.

"You don't really know the Uchiha clan, do you, Naruto?" Naruto shook his head.

"Well, most of them aren't a lot like Sasuke, Itachi, or myself." Naruto looked confused. Shisui explained.

"The Uchiha clan are very proud of their heritage – the and the Senju clan founded this village, but the Senju's shinobi died out long ago, with the exception of Tsunade-sama, but she's no longer in Konoha. Therefore, the Uchiha are the oldest clan here, and their history is debatably the most illustrious in this village. They're known for producing high-quality shinobi, and there's something about the Uchiha that's unique – the Sharingan." Shisui showed his three tomoe Dojutsu, drawing a gasp of wonder from Naruto.

"Wow, I guess Sasuke's going to have that too?" Shisui nodded, and turned off his visual technique.

"But, all of those good traits made the Uchiha very stuck up. The Nidaime Hokage, Senju Tobirama, lost many friends and family in the Senju-Uchiha wars before the hidden villages were made. Because of that, he… wasn't very keen on having an Uchiha in a place of high power." Naruto frowned.

"Why would he do that? Just because he lost a few people, doesn't mean he can act like that to all of the Uchiha, ttebayo!" Shisui smiled.

"I'm glad you think that way, Naruto, but that's not the whole story. Remember who the Shodai Hokage was?" Naruto frowned.

"Senju… Hashirama! Wasn't he Nidaime-sama's older brother?" Shisui nodded.

"Shodai-sama was the one who made the peace with the Uchiha and their clan leader, Uchiha Madara. Originally, Shodai-sama wanted Madara to succeed him as Hokage, but for some reason, Madara went rogue and tried to kill him. Their battle was fierce – there are legends of Madara riding a giant blue Kyuubi, and rumors of Shodai-sama summoning a Buddha, but no one knows for sure, except maybe Sandaime-sama and the elders. Anyway… Madara died, but that left a scar on Nidaime-sama's view of the Uchiha." Naruto looked down at the ground. He didn't like this story at all.

"Because of that, the Uchiha were placed in charge of the police, which is one of the most crucial places in the village, but…"

"-they weren't able to get higher than that, right?" Naruto looked at Shisui, who nodded, internally shocked.

"Many Uchiha saw it as a gaining of power, and thus became confident with their skills, and more proud of their ancestry. Even though none of them had the chance of getting the position of Hokage, or Jonin commander, they fell back on their past – their status as one of the founding clans, their common ancestor in Uchiha Madara, and became arrogant. How did Sasuke act when he joined the academy for the first time?" Naruto's face soured.

"He was all stuck-up and rude." Shisui laughed.

"That's what most Uchiha are like on a normal basis. If Sasuke didn't have a brother like Itachi to keep him moving forward, he might still be like that." Shisui bought two ice cream cones and started walking towards the Uchiha clan compound, Naruto following.

"Now, let's fast forward a bit. What do you know about the Kyuubi attack, Naruto?" Naruto scrunched his face, trying to remember.

"The big fox appeared in the village and started smashing everything around, but then Yondaime-sama appeared on a giant frog and killed it!" Shisui nodded.

"So Naruto, what do you think the Uchiha police were doing during that fight?" Naruto shrugged.

"Think of it this way – why do police exist?" Naruto 'hmm'd, and tapped his chin lightly.

"To keep people safe?"

"Good. The Uchiha were keeping everyone safe in underground compounds, and so they couldn't help out in the fight. Once the beast was killed, everyone in the village knew someone who had died – some had lost family, friends, teammates, but the Uchiha…"

"Didn't lose anyone, because they were guarding the compounds, ttebayo?" Shisui nodded. The two reached a large lake on the outskirts of the compound and sat down.

"Yes, and because of that, people grew angry at the Uchiha, and started thinking they caused the Kyuubi to attack." Naruto frowned again.

"They didn't, did they?" Shisui shook his head.

"The only Uchiha who could ever be strong enough to control that beast was Madara, and he died decades ago. Plus, why would the Uchiha attack their own village?" Naruto saw Shisui's point, and took his answer.

"But anyway, that attack destroyed the old Uchiha clan compound, and so we were relocated here, to the edge of the village." Naruto frowned.

"So then the Uchiha lost a lot – all of their homes." Shisui nodded.

"And because we were away from most other villagers, we kept to ourselves, and stayed proud of our heritage." Naruto looked around at the buildings, all with Uchiha fans decorating them. He then turned back to Shisui.

"But you, Sasuke, and Itachi aren't like that. You said so yourself." Shisui nodded.

"I chose you because you remind me a lot of myself from when I was younger. I would run around, get into a bit of trouble, and then usually end up in front of Hokage-sama's desk, being reprimanded." Naruto looked surprised, he wouldn't have taken Shisui for a pranker.

"There's a lot of things I wish could happen, and a lot of things I wish didn't happen, so I want to teach you to make sure you don't have to make the mistakes I did." Naruto could see some of the similarities between him and Shisui – optimistic, friendly, cool, prank-loving, but…

"I have a question, Shisui-sensei. If Sasuke is one of my best friends, and you're my sensei, does that make Itachi one of your best friends?" He nodded and laughed.

"Itachi is probably my best friend. You know, he's honestly the best big brother Sasuke could have ever had." Naruto looked surprised.

"Think about this; when the Kyuubi attack happened, Itachi was the one who got his baby brother to the shelter. When my parents had active duties that stopped them from being home, Itachi would look after Sasuke. When he was old enough to crawl around, Itachi played with him, and later on, started to train him. Sasuke was always confident because he knew that Itachi's training gave him a step above his classmates, at least for a few days." Naruto could understand that.

"You know, Itachi's one of the most powerful shinobi in the village." Naruto looked surprised.

"He's a Jonin, and became genin at a very young age. There were only two people in the history of Konoha who graduated faster – one of them was a prodigy, war hero, and eventually became an ANBU commander. The other was the Yondaime Hokage." Naruto was shocked. "And, Itachi cares as much for Sasuke more than anything else – more than his clan, more than his village or his kage." Naruto was stunned into silence, and was left with a feeling of emptiness – Naruto had no one like that looking out for him.

"Don't worry, Naruto." The young Uzumaki looked up.

"Hm?"

"If you work as hard as you can to have Itachi's kindness, everyone will be jealous of your friends, family, and precious people. When you become a Jonin and care for your Genin, everyone will be envious of them, and on the day you become Hokage, all of the other villages will be jealous their leaders don't care as much as you will." Naruto felt small pricks on the edge of his eyes, but he wouldn't let a single tear out.

"Thank you, Shisui-sensei." As Shunshin no Shisui ruffled the young Uzumaki's hair, he dismissed him, allowing Naruto to return to his apartment once more.

As he took a shower, he thought a lot about what Shisui had said – his mentor not only believed he would be the kind of person Itachi was, but that he would become a Jonin, a teacher of his own, and a kage. As Naruto looked at the eyes staring back at him in the mirror, Naruto was shocked to see the determination brewing in them.

Putting on his clothes and grabbing a cup of ramen, Naruto sprinted out of the door, consuming the noodles as he dashed across buildings.

Arriving, he saw his friends all seated around the large stone block, holding robes and mask. It seemed Sasuke had found Shino as well, because he was there.

"Naruto, you're late. Get your robe and mask, and meet us here." Excited, Naruto ran to the closet, grabbed his robe and cloak, and sat down in between Shikamaru and Sasuke, as everyone placed their costumes on.

"As we can all see, the robes and masks fit us well. You've done nicely, Fox, Warlord." Naruto and Sasuke blinked, realizing who he was speaking to. They nodded.

"We have a lot of information from the Chunin exams, but before we get to that, I think there's some things we need to decide." Turning towards Shikamaru, all the other masked faces looked in questioning.

"Firstly, we must decide our goal, our purpose, as troublesome as that is." Everyone thought long and hard before some ideas were proposed.

"My brother told me that the worst thing a nation could face is war – what if our goal was keeping peace in Konoha?" Shikamaru shook his head.

"If we want to ensure peace, Warlord, we can't act solely in the Land of Fire. Other nations could declare war on _us_ , which means we'd have to be active in other villages." Choji quickly asked how that could be done, at which point Shino replied.

"Bear, we could increase our sphere of influence, like we stated earlier, by getting one of us in the Hokage position. To do that, we'd have to become Jonin, influential shinobi, and likely take on very difficult missions or gain renown." Shikamaru sighed.

"I want our group to be the most powerful ninja organization in the Great Nations!" Said Kiba, his alligator mask looking around the room. Shikamaru looked around.

"So for our goals, we have either increasing influence, having a Kage in our group, ensuring peace, and becoming the most powerful Ninja organization around. If these are our goals, we need to decide what order to put them in." Naruto looked at Shikamaru.

"How will we do that, ttebayo?"

"How about we decide a leader, and then let the leader decide?" Shikamaru nodded at Sasuke's suggestion.

"Who has the most potential for leadership here? Let's do a vote."

Shikamaru turned to Choji, who sat next to him.

"You first, Bear."

"I vote Shika-er, Demon."

"Demon. It is logical."

"Alligator!" As Sasuke's turn was next, he looked around at everyone before choosing.

"Demon."

"Demon, ttebayo." Shikamaru looked surprised at Naruto's choice – he would have expected Naruto to vote for himself.

"Mendokuse… How about Kitsune?" Thus, the votes were in.

Four had voted for Shikamaru

One had voted for Kiba

One had voted for Naruto.

"Demon, you're the leader, ttebayo! Congrats!" Shikamaru sighed.

"Why did you vote for me anyhow? Don't you want to be Hokage?" Naruto laughed.

"I don't have to be the group's leader to be its choice for Hokage. You're the smartest person here, Demon. You planned out this meeting, the masks, the robes, the mountain…" Shikamaru sighed.

"Well then, as leader, I have a declaration to make." Everyone looked attentively.

"I announce Kitsune as the Hokage candidate and new leader of this organization, and hereby place myself as Lead Strategist." While externally everyone was silent, internally they all felt sweat drops. Of course Shikamaru would be far too lazy to take the mantle of leadership.

"Well, looks like I have to make the decisions now, eh, ttebayo?" Naruto frowned.

"You know, we could do all of these things, just one at a time." Shikamaru nodded his assent to Sasuke's observation, and Naruto then started thinking about that.

"How about… We learn how teams are made once we graduate, and then after that, set things up so that we can all be on the same teams?" Kiba intervened.

"Each team has three people, and almost always it's two boys and one girl, or two girls and one boy. We'd have to be on three teams at least." Shikamaru nodded, and added his own say.

"Alligator is right, but I also know that some teams have specific purposes – for instance, my dad, Bear's dad, and Ino's dad were all on a team when they graduated, so I suspect it'll be me, Bear, and Ino on one." Choji nodded, eating a bag of chips.

"So what really matters now is between Alligator, Scarab, Warlord, and Kitsune, who is going to be on what team." Naruto hmm'd, and pointed towards Sasuke.

"Sasuke, er… Warlord and I will be on one team, Alligator and Scarab in the other. How does that sound?" Kiba seemed fine with the idea, and Shino had the rough emotional expression of a brick wall. Naruto turned towards Shikamaru for confirmation about whether or not those seemed solid picks, and he nodded.

"So once we do that, we can make our way up the ladder to Jonin, and maybe make some friends and get some new members along the way." Shikamaru intervened at this point.

"Perhaps we could add some people from outside Konoha, so that we can establish peace in their nations before we ascend Kitsune to Kage level." Sasuke and Shino were the first to approve, but Kiba and Choji seemed apprehensive.

"But dude, how can we trust that they'll keep their promises? How can we trust people from outside of the pack?" Choji nodded in agreement.

"That's why we have to be careful with who we pick. I do have one more concern while we're all here though." Everyone turned to Shikamaru.

"How are we going to maintain contact with each other when we could all be on different missions? If something changes in our organization, or we get members from other nations, we'll need to know _how_ to contact each other." At that point, Shino cleared his throat.

"In the library, I came across something… interesting. Apparently, there is a jutsu salvaged from a village named Uzushiogakure which can project the bodies of people by picking up 'thought waves' of some kind. If someone can actively use this jutsu, we could communicate with all members in a true meeting, regardless of where they are. The only downside is, we need a seal of some kind to channel chakra into, on each person." Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, and then turned to Naruto.

"Kitsune, permission to make a decree on this matter?" Naruto nodded.

"Kitsune will learn this technique of Uzushiogakure, and we can all place our seals on the masks. Once everyone has those marks, we can try meetings, and toy around with distances, and such. Once Kitsune is competent enough in the technique, we can try using it from large distances and such. Of course, everyone will need to channel chakra, so we should have a group focus on that." Naruto clapped his hands excitedly, liking the suggestion.

"Okay, so here's the order of things we should go for." Everyone listened to their leader's list.

"First, we get this jutsu down. Next, we make sure our Genin teams match up with how we want them. After that, we make friends from other villages and maybe invite a couple. After that, we rise through the ranks and become Jonin, and maybe get people a little bit higher, such as clan heads," he turned to Shikamaru, Choji, and Shino, "Important Jonin to the village…" He turned to Sasuke and Kiba, "And eventually I'll be Hokage. After that, we'll make a really long peace using our friends from other villages." Everyone thought about it, before Shikamaru pulled out a piece of paper, a brush, and some ink, quickly scrawling down the goals of their group.

"Everyone, sign using your code name." After everyone had signed, Shikamaru nailed the document to the wall.

"Next, I propose we start amassing funds for the sake of improving this area." Naruto and Kiba looked rather confused.

"Firstly, this area is useful, but cluttered and small – we should look for ways to increase the size, security, and overall efficiency of our base."

"How should we do that, Demon?" Sasuke asked, curious about the strategist's thoughts.

"Firstly, we should use seals to ward off anyone – shinobi or civilian. This is _our_ secret base, and the less people who see it, the more secure it is." Shino then spoke up, standing.

"Leave that to me – I'll find something."

"Excellent. Scarab, this is your first task for the group – everyone else here has been part of a major mission, and this is your first. Have a fun time, you troublesome beetle." With Shikamaru's blessing, Shino sat down.

"Secondly, we should see if we can increase the space of this area without collapsing the mountain on us. That will give us enough space to make definite areas – maybe we can each have our own little section if all goes well." Naruto was all in favor of an idea like that – perhaps they could even have sleepovers! Naruto had never had social things like sleepovers before, and had rarely gone places with his friends, with the exception of the little misadventures they had.

"I know that one of the elements is Doton: Earth Style. Maybe we can look in our clans or the library for something." Choji's remark was finished with the sound of crunching barbecue chips.

"All yours, Bear." Naruto's word seemed to give confidence to Choji's suggestion.

"Next, we need to designate areas – what stuff goes where. I would like to nominate myself, Warlord, and Kitsune for this task, troublesome as it is." Kiba then stood up and yelled.

"And what about me?" Naruto thought long and hard before making his decree.

"Take Akamaru with you and look around outside – I don't know much about this area, but if you can get us some information, we could find stuff for new pranks, ttebayo." Kiba nodded, and looked ready to leap off into the jungle, but Shikamaru stopped him.

"And another thing – we don't know what this stone is for. It _seems_ to have been inserted in some way, yet we don't know for sure. It might hold something interesting, and I don't wanna mess with it incase it's troublesome." Naruto felt a tad uneasy, like butterflies where in his stomach when he looked at the rock. He didn't know what it held, but still felt a tad nervous. Nodding in agreement, he brought up an idea.

"You know, we never really figured out what that thing in the forest was. Maybe we could flush it out soon?" Shikamaru turned towards Naruto.

"If you want to do something that messy, let's at least get Shisui or Itachi involved." Naruto and Sasuke made eye contact and nodded.

"We'll make sure it happens. Can you make a strategy for whatever happens?" Shikamaru sighed and gave a thumbs up.

"Just don't make things too troublesome. I'll get you _something_ by the end of the day tomorrow. Everyone, meet here tomorrow morning?"

"I'll ask my mom and dad to make enough food for us to have breakfast here!"

"It seems logical to be spending time with future teammates and associates in this organization. I want to be involved."

"Hn. Count me in."

"Akamaru and I will be here first, count on that!"

"As leader and future Hokage, I have to be here, eh? Let's meet here – tomorrow!" The six disbanded, and set in stone the foundations for a Shinobi organization that would turn the world on its shoulders.

* * *

 **If anyone has predictions about who the mystery shinobi is, send them to me. I believe I threw a few clues here and there, but nothing _too_ obvious. I hope. **

**As always, please give me feedback/advice. What did you like? What could be improved? What do you want to know about? Let me know.**

 **~KoS**

 **P.S: I AM looking for a beta, and if anyone knows someone willing to, I'm all ears. I have most of the important details written out, and I'd love someone to help me with the process.**


	8. Chapter 8: Battle, Birthday, Uchiha

**Hi all. You probably expected this fic to be dead, right?**

 **It was. Then I got a notification asking me if the story was dead. Afterwards, I decided that since I had graduated, I may as well continue writing in my free time. When I checked this document, I realized I only had to write half a chapter or so, and as such, figured I'd wrap this one up. I'll try to get another done before I start college, sound good? :)**

 **Please let me know how this chapter fits in with the rest - I'm rather rusty and had to re-read my other chapters to get a feel for where the story was at when I left it.**

 **If you have found this story entertaining, or derive some happiness from reading it, thank Ryuuohjin for his review. I give him/her credit for reminding me this project was unfinished. That being said, let us dive in to the story~**

"Kitsune, I found something interesting." Naruto turned towards Kiba, who had been scouting the area since the day before.

"What is it?"

"I think I figured out how the guy came into the park."

"The guy Scarab thinks is an enemy ninja?" Kiba's alligator mask nodded. "How?"

"There's several small holes in the Konoha wall, going into the park. Whoever's in there came from _outside_ the village, just like Shi-er-Scarab said." Naruto turned towards the maps that Kiba and Shino had made, and Kiba marked the holes in the wall. Turning towards where Shikamaru was napping, he mentally debated waking up the sleepy Nara.

Naruto thought long and hard before deciding not to – if he was going to be leader, he had to make decisions on his own.

"You and I will go there. Demon and Bear will follow us with supplies, with Scarab and Warlord backing them up. We can leave our masks and robes here – we don't want people to know about us too soon. Akamaru will guard the base." Kiba nodded, and walked around, whacking the sleeping Shikamaru and yelling at everyone else to get ready.

As the group assembled, Naruto repeated their tasks – Naruto himself and Kiba would take the vanguard, Shino and Sasuke would guard the sides, and ultimately would be responsible for keeping Shikamaru and Choji safe, who were bringing light medical supplies, along with dulled Kunai & Shuriken Naruto would bring three flares too – one green, to signal the advance of the other four to the hole, a yellow to have everyone meet up, and a red flare to signal the location of the enemy.

As Naruto and Kiba approached the wall the intruder seemed to have come through, Naruto looked sharply at the wood. It had been charred, but some of the wood surrounding the hole seemed to be more pliable, and had become softer. Whatever had broken through this wall was not fire – not if the other boards were an indication.

As the two entered through the hole, they saw very little evidence of unusual life. The boards that had been broken to enter the village were still sitting there, and seemed to have not been moved in a while, as moss had started to grow on them. While Naruto had expected some more immediate evidence of an unusual presence and was confused, Kiba's mind was flashing through alarm bells, and he felt very much on edge.

"Naruto." Kiba hissed, pulling the blonde close. "If this was an animal, there would be tracks! I can smell the intruder's scent all over the place! Hell, I can smell it right now!" Naruto got himself out of Kiba's grip before looking at the Inuzuka and the small white puppy a few feet behind, both looking very worried.

"What does that mean, Kiba?" Kiba looked in the forest.

"I think that if it's something bad… It's an enemy ninja. I can smell the rough strength of Chakra because of my Inuzuka genes, and I can tell this level is insane." Naruto looked around, and his eyes met with the hole in the wall. Of course, no Konoha ninja would have a need to break into his or her own home village, so an intruder was the most likely possibility. The bit about the strength of Chakra was concerning, but Naruto and Kiba couldn't exactly stop now…

Naruto, Kiba, and Akamaru moved forward, and Naruto noticed that Kiba kept looking behind him.

"Kiba, why are you so nervous? It's only Akamaru!" Kiba blinked down at his dog. Yeah, it was only Akamaru, thought Kiba, as his eyes widened slightly.

"Yeah. I don't know why I'm so nervous." Turning around but keeping his ears pricked for sound, Kiba suggested that Naruto use the green flare. While Naruto fumbled around in his backpack, Kiba thought for a second – he knew something very important, but he couldn't say it. As Kiba debated what to do, the others followed the Inuzuka and Uzumaki inside the hole in the wall, and looked around once they were all in.

"Damnit." Kiba whispered to himself. "What would Shikamaru do?" He thought of Shikamaru, and whenever he was determined, he always wrote down information – a lot of it. Kiba felt angry – he had no paper and no pencil – how would he write? He looked down at his hand, and at his pointer finger. Poking Naruto, he whispered the location of the chakra source. Before he could stop him, Naruto looked around, but there was no one to be seen.

This would normally make someone feel more safe, but as the boys realized there was a new shadow over them that was rapidly growing, fear returned.

Kiba immediately told his friends "Scatter", as they saw the figure dropping down from the sky onto them. Moving, they took in the red armor, masked face, and steam puffing out of a contraption on his back. Within Naruto and the strange man's guts, beasts of old legend stirred, recognizing each other's presence.

"You, brat!" Roared Han, Jinchuriki of the five tails. Zeroing in with hatred on Naruto, he charged relentlessly. Naruto however, was one known for outrunning ANBU black ops, this fight wasn't over till it was over! Dodging using the training Shisui-sensei taught him, Naruto threw his bombs at Han, who covered his face, expecting smoke or chemicals. Instead, Han met with a smell no human should ever have to endure.

That being said, Han wasn't a Jonin for nothing. He had survived the Third Shinobi World War. He had survived battles against the Third Hokage, the Fourth Kazekage, Han had fought former Jinchuriki of the One Tails, Six Tails, and others, and the Fourth Hokage – Minato Namikaze.

"A noxious bomb, eh? How useless…" Han was about to charge again when he heard a voice in his head.

 ** _"Han, stay careful. That boy has the Kyuubi in him. Remember what I told you about the Beast War. Don't kill him, but don't let him off either._** **"** Han nodded and charged, kicking Naruto in the gut. For all of his strength, Han was immensely careful. He would not let the Kyuubi die with its vessel, but would do everything in his power to slow down his ability to challenge the Nanabi. Immediately, Sasuke, Kiba, and Akamaru leapt into action, while Shikamaru knelt down in the Shadow Posession Jutsu stance his father had taught him, and Shino readied his insects, even though he knew he couldn't drain enemy chakra yet.

Han grabbed Sasuke, and swung him in a wide arc, hitting both Kiba and Akamaru out of the air, and then followed that up with a toss straight into Shikamaru, which knocked the lazy genius unconscious immediately. Naruto got up, and looked in horror as Choji found a huge fist in his gut, and keeled over, clutching his stomach in pain. Shino then sent out as many bugs as he could, relaying the crisis of battle to any Aburame close enough to intervene. Naruto slowly got himself up, and started throwing punches at Han – no one would hurt his friends and get away.

"Not strong enough, kid." Naruto got a kick to the face which knocked him up, and as he fell, Naruto looked at the state of his friends. Shikamaru – unconscious, bleeding. Sasuke – bleeding, clutching his ribs in pain. Choji - clutching his stomach. Shino - receiving a Boil Release enhanced fist to the stomach. Kiba – unconscious with Akamaru on top of him. Naruto closed his eyes, as if wishing this battle could be nothing more than a simple nightmare. As he was about to hit the ground, a blur caught him and propped him against a tree.

The weakened child looked into the three tomoe Sharingan of Uchiha Shisui, who lightly smiled at the child, before glaring at the Iwagakure Jinchuriki. The Jinchuriki was about to charge at the man regarded as Shunshin no Shisui before a shadow wrapped itself around him, and Han found himself unable to move. Fighting his sudden immobility, Han glimpsed a man behind him who looked similar to the Nara boy, only with several scars, a small goatee, and an enraged glare. To his left was a man with a long blonde ponytail, to his right, a large man with a huge red mane of hair, a great staff, and battle armor.

"Han of Iwagakure." Han struggled and roared his anger.

"I will not be defeated here! My tailed beast's will must be fulfilled! The Kyuubi shall be defeated! You will not send me back to Iwagakure! They did not understand my prophecy!" Choza Akmichi looked absolutely livid, and first smashed Han's back with his staff, before enlarging his hands and holding the man sustained. Inoichi walked up to the restrained Han, and looked him in the eye.

"What prophecy is this, Gobi Jinchuriki?" Han scoffed, as Inoichi placed a hand on the Iwa shinobi's forehead, entering his mind. Upon entering the mindscape, Inoichi found himself in a large plains, with large stakes in the center. Inside of the stakes, a large white horse with a dolphin's head looked down upon him, five tails waving calmly.

 **"Greetings, human. I am the Five Tails."** Inoichi looked up at the beast with a frown.

"Greetings, my name is Yamanaka Inoichi. Five tails, what is this prophecy your Jinchuriki is so adamant about enacting?" Kokuo looked at the Yamanaka, before sighing and answering.

 **"Our creator's chakra has emerged, warning us of impending calamity. Because of this, us beasts have been ordered to unite under a single banner. Two separate banners are set on a collision course, and will not stop until one is victorious lies victorious, the other crushed under foot."** Inoichi Yamanaka looked at the beast, confused.

"Who is your creator, Gobi? What calamity has he foreseen? Who are these banners?" The five tails sighed sadly.

 **"** ** _Who_** **my creator is doesn't matter.** ** _What_** **the calamity is isn't known. There is no more information I can give you, human. Regardless of my Jinchuriki's insanity, I am a proud Bijuu, and I refuse to stoop so low as to give humanity the information I possess."** Inoichi looked up before asking one more question.

"Based on what my colleagues and I saw, your Jinchuriki was hell-bent on killing Naruto, the Kyuubi Jinchuriki." Kokuo nodded once, his movements rigid and stoic.

"If the Kyuubi is one banner, who is the other?" Kokuo's eyes widened in shock, before he gave an answer.

 **"The other banner belongs to the camp of one of your allies. That's all I will say, human."** Inoichi bowed before asking one last question.

"I hope you don't intend to lend your Jinchuriki your powers, you know. If you don't react, we won't have to extract you from your current host." Kokuo sighed sadly.

 **"As I said, I am a proud Bijuu, and my current host is insane. I will have no part in his fury unless he forces me into it… Also, human…"** Inoichi turned back. **"Hide your secrets better. My Jinchuriki was able to figure out the Kyuubi child's father within a few seconds of laying eyes upon him."** Inoichi burrowed his eyes. He had _suspicions_ as to who Naruto's father was, but nothing concrete, until now.

"Thank you, Gobi." Kokuo nodded and laid down, waiting for the human to leave. As Inoichi departed from investigating Han's memories, the Yamanaka clan leader looked towards Shikaku.

"He's acting completely separate from Iwagakure. No mission was given for him to do this." The Nara clan leader nodded as Han roared once more. Quickly using a mind jutsu to knock him unconscious, Inoichi instructed his clansmen to take the young boys to the hospital, and alert their families as to what had happened. Shisui would take Naruto, because he was Naruto's sensei.

After the six academy students had been taken, the Ino-Shika-Cho trio moved Han to the Hokage's office, and then the four moved to the Torture and Interrogation department, where Ibiki Morino grinned sadistically – the next few days would not be fun for Han. At least the prisons of Konohagakure wouldn't be nearly as bad as the interrogations he was about to endure.

 ** _That Night_**

Naruto awoke with a start, and looked around his room in the hospital, which was large, and had other beds in it. Looking around, Naruto could see the varied conditions of his friends, all of whom had bandages, one or two had IV drips set up to transfer pain medication, and Naruto's head swam, and he wanted to talk with his friends. Groaning loudly enough to be heard, Naruto waited for a few seconds, before groaning again – receiving a reaction.

"Naruto, shut up please." Sasuke's unhappy voice was apparent.

"You the only one up, Sasuke?" Sasuke groaned, confirming it.

"The rest were given more meds, and you just recovered on your own." Naruto gave a 'hm' and observed the wall before asking a question.

"Hey Sasuke, what village was that guy from?"

"Iwa."

"Why would they send that guy after Konoha?" Sasuke grunted. It seemed he didn't know either.

"You know, we should figure out a plan for how this won't happen again." Sasuke yawned before voicing his agreement.

"Perhaps we can talk about it tomorrow so your talking doesn't kill my head outright, you troublesome friends of mine…" Drawled Shikamaru, clearly unhappy at being woken up in the night.

"Yeah, let's sleep on it and talk in the morning." Said Choji, as Naruto was left to question if everyone was awake now.

"All in favor?" Asked Naruto.

"Hn."

"As long as you bring food."

"Sounds logical."

"I'll bring a Shogi board."

"Count me and Akamaru in too, Naruto." With that, Naruto was able to fall asleep, knowing that all of his friends were alright – albeit irritated – and resolved to create something when he woke up, though Naruto had no clue what. Throughout the entire night, Naruto dreamed of being Hokage, with Shikamaru and Shino as his strategists, Sasuke, Choji, and Kiba as his top shinobi, leading armies into battle, and Ami, Kasumi, and Fuki all banished from the village. Drooling and giggling in his sleep as he saw a vision of Teuchi and Ayami delivering a ramen bowl with a two meter radius, Naruto was able to rest himself well, not knowing that his dreams of making his group of friends official were being created by the ideas of a fox buried deep within a sealing matrix.

The next morning, Naruto woke up to the sounds of chatter, and adults speaking. Opening his eyes, Naruto saw the families of his friends – Sasuke's brother Itachi and Shisui sitting by Sasuke's bedside, Yoshino Nara verbally ripping her husband a new one in front of Shikamaru, Choza Akimichi giving some takeout Yakiniku Q to his son who scarfed it wolfishly, Shibi Aburame staring at his son with no expression, who in return nonchalantly stared back, and a girl who looked to be a close relative of Kiba's looked over Akamaru while the young Inuzuka complained.

Naruto, after looking around, felt the void between him and his friends grow wider. Initial cheeky grin fading into a more thoughtful expression, the young Uzumaki started pondering – why did the enemy ninja target _him_ specifically? Why was he always so different from his friends – they all had clans, parents, some had siblings, yet Naruto… was scorned. The villagers, while not openly hostile to him, treated him as an inferior, and their looks at him were forever burnt into the young boy's mind. Just as Naruto's mind was about to enter a dark place, a knock at the door saw the entrance of two people who had just the remedy for brooding – a bowl of ramen so big, Naruto was sure that two or three of his own body mass could fit in it.

"Teuchi-jichan! Ayame-neechan!" Naruto looked excitedly at the old ramen chef and the young girl only a few years older than him, who beamed down at him excitedly. While Teuchi started listing off everything he had put in the ramen and how much time they had been designing a bowl of this scale, Ayame fussed over the state of Naruto.

"You're too young to be getting into battles, Naruto! You only entered the academy a little bit ago, what did you think you were doing?" Naruto giggled at the sight of the ramen and listed off his reasons.

"To usurp Hokage-Jiji's position, I have to be even better than him, which means taking out all of the bad guys…" Naruto stopped talking at the sight of a furious Ayame, and saw the flashing of a Shinigami behind her.

"Uzumaki Naruto, don't you even try to defend battling a veteran ninja in front of me!" Said Ayame with venom, prompting Naruto to panic, and focus on his ramen, much to the amusement of Teuchi. As he did so, his friends all started to turn around at an ungodly slurping sound, and the young Uzumaki's friends looked in shock as he devoured the ramen like a ravenous beast – slurping up the noodles, eating the pork slices, the eggs, the Naruto fishcakes, and the menma bamboo shoots with a vengeance. They saw mounds of toppings, continents of noodles, and oceans of broth devoured into the void – also known as Naruto's pit of a stomach.

The next few days were filled with recovery, jokes, and moderately crappy hospital food. As everyone was close enough to 100% around the fifth day or so, the group was called into the Hokage's office.

"I'm glad to see you all recovered, boys. I must admit – I wasn't expecting to hear that you all had survived an encounter with an elite, veteran Jonin of Iwagakure." At this point, everyone's reactions varied. Kiba and Naruto grew expressions of pride, as Sasuke, Choji, and Shikamaru looked in anticipation, as if expecting some sort of "But…" statement from the Hokage. Shino had no reaction.

"Er, Jiji…" Naruto trailed off, his hand raised into the air. The Sandaime raised an eyebrow, but prompted him to continue.

"Who paid my hospital bill?" Sarutobi smiled, understanding that Naruto must have felt considerable financial stress about the billing.

"Considering the attack was done by a foreign Shinobi, and you all fought valiantly, 75% of all costs related to your injuries were paid for by the Shinobi Financial Office. The remaining 25% was paid for by your respective clans. As for you, Naruto, the remaining cost was split between myself, and the Ichiraku family, who felt concerned that their number-one customer was in such a state." Naruto felt immense relief, but a strange pang in his chest. He knew he had worried the Ichiraku family – Ayame's reaction had been proof of it – but he didn't feel happy knowing that they had paid a part of his medical bill.

"Regardless, I have chosen to give you official mission pay for the task as well. B-rank missions are ones that guarantee combat with enemy ninja, and as your combat provided safety to the village, I have seen it fit to give you a B-rank payment of 150,000 Ryo*. I encourage you to use the funds wisely. In addition, you all have been given a D-rank mission's worth of pay – 50,000 Ryo, for locating the structural weakness in Konoha's walls." With that, Sarutobi passed out pouches with Ryo for each one of them, and dismissed the boys, as they walked outside. Many had a parent or some other family waiting for them. Before the boys went to their families, Shikamaru requested that they go to a civilian park to discuss planning. The boys met with their parents, who allowed them to go, as long as someone watched them. In this case, Shikaku Nara & Itachi Uchiha, who was in his ANBU outfit.

The boys reached the playground and sat down on a play structure. Shikamaru spoke.

"I remember we had planned to meet in the morning and talk during one of those nights, but never got around to it. Should we talk now?" Seeing nods from everyone else in the group, he spoke up.

"It seems that we should start improving the condition of our group's hideout." Naruto's eyebrows furrowed.

"Why, because we have money now?" Shikamaru nodded, but before he could continue, Naruto spoke up.

"As leader, I say no on that, until we pay back the people who helped pay our hospital bills." Naruto hadn't stopped thinking about the Ichiraku family covering his bills – they weren't related to him, Naruto was just a customer who happened to be a favorite of theirs. Naruto felt guilty, an emotion he didn't feel terribly often, as a merciless pranker of Konoha.

"I agree with Naruto. Even though I know my dad would rather pay the hospital bill than see me hurt, I still feel bad, knowing I worried him." At that, every single one of the boys joined Naruto in thinking about the important adults in their lives – parents, other family members, people who looked out for them and felt worry about the injuries inflicted by Han of Iwagakure.

Shikamaru looked at Naruto and collected his thoughts before proceeding.

"How about we pay back the people who paid for the bills, and then take whatever else we have left from the payments and use that?" Choji nodded happily, and Naruto was on board as well. Once those two nodded, Kiba and Sasuke voiced their approval as well. Shino, however, was in reflection – this was one of his first real experiences with friends, and it was a fairly long-term experience as well, being in the hospital for several days. Despite the pain from injuries, and the trouble the painkillers caused to his hive, Shino had to admit that he had enjoyed the jokes shared, the stories told, Naruto's insistence that there should be a Ramen holiday, and Shikamaru's insistence that all Konoha residents should be given an extra day in the weekend until the end of time.

With that decided, the five boys from major clans departed together, as Naruto walked towards Ichiraku's.

"Naruto." Said Shikamaru, turning back towards him.

"Do you want to go to the barbecue place for dinner? All six of us, to celebrate getting out of the hospital?" Naruto paused before nodding, a happy expression on his face.

"After that, lets start planning what to use the remaining money for, okay?" Shikamaru gave a thumbs up. As the young Nara got far enough away from Naruto, he laughed softly, and spoke to the others.

"This is why I made him the leader." Choji and Shino looked in relative confusion, whereas Kiba and Sasuke seemed to have an idea or three.

"He may not be the smartest tool in the shed, but I guess he makes pretty good decisions." Said the young Inuzuka. Shikamaru hummed his agreement, and the young boys split off, each to his own clan. As they passed, they didn't see Yakumo Kurama watching from a substantial distance, deciding between asking why the boys had been absent from the academy, or investigating it independently. Even though Yakumo may not have the best physical strength, her mind is incredibly sharp. As such, she sought ways to show her prowess as a shinobi. Perhaps these investigations could help her.

Farther away, Naruto eventually reached Ichiraku, and waited as Ayame gave the young blonde a crushing hug, glad to see her favorite customer alive. Naruto reached for the packet, before paying them for the hospital costs. While the Ichiraku family insisted it wasn't a problem and were simply glad he was alright, Naruto was adamant, and refused to leave until he paid them back.

After the rushed, speedy pace of life after the mega-prank in Ami's house, and the slow, grueling days in the hospital, it felt odd for life to pass at such a normal pace again. Several hours later, Naruto waited outside of Yakiniku Q, feeling impatient and restless – the young jinchuriki was eager for a meal with his friends, and renewed planning for their squad, organization, friend group, whatever they wanted to call it. While the odds of doing pranks seemed lower due to Shino's joining, and the fact that parents would certainly watch over their kids, Naruto was still excited for what the future held.

Naruto didn't have to wait for a terribly long time – within twenty or so minutes, all of his friends/associates had arrived, and they requested a booth for 6. To Naruto's surprise and delight, the establishment welcomed him the same as they welcomed everyone else – nicely. The boys sat down, and seeing as the joint knew Choji and his eating habits, brought out several platters of meat and vegetables right from the beginning.

Naruto was impressed, but this was also another first with his friends – going out and eating together, without parental supervision.

"So, perhaps we should figure out exactly how much money we have between us." Shikamaru said, looking around. As each member pulled out the money he had left over, Shino started counting, before pronouncing that of the original 1,200,000 Ryo given by the Sandaime, a solid 300,000 remained.

"How much will the meal cost?" Asked Sasuke, noting that Kiba, Akamaru, and Choji were wolfing down beef and pork as quickly as it arrived. Shikamaru noticed this and set aside some quantity of Ryo to pay, and give a tip for all the trouble of feeding such ravenous beasts as members of this group.

"I suggest we start investing in getting those jutsu online, Naruto. The chakra one I was talking about." Naruto chuckled, as Sasuke stated the obvious issue.

"Shikamaru, Naruto doesn't have the clan-based chakra trainings that the rest of us have." Shikamaru sighed, but Sasuke had a solution as well.

"I do have a cousin in the Uchiha clan who is a year younger than us, and is starting her most basic chakra training. Normally an adult would do it, but her parents are out of town on a mission, and so I have to Perhaps Naruto could join us while the rest of us do whatever work we need to do." Shikamaru nodded his agreement, as Naruto nodded. He would do whatever he needed to in order to become Hokage, even if that meant Sasuke had to be his teacher for a little bit.

As Shino, Sasuke, and Shikamaru had eaten their fill, they continued talking and planning what was needed. As the young Jinchuriki continued to eat alongside Kiba & Choji, Naruto knew that he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed, but his friends weren't looking dumb with their fingers (not their thumbs) pointing at furniture magazines on the table.

All joking aside, Naruto knew that he could rely on his friends to make the smart decisions – Shikamaru had done all the planning for the prank on Ami's house, Sasuke had been his brother-in-prank for that enormous event, and everyone at that table had fought together against the great steam man, whose name was still unknown to Naruto and co.

 ** _The Next Day_** …

Naruto went up to the gates of the Uchiha compound, where he found Sasuke waiting for him.

"Naruto! You're early!" This was true. Naruto had no idea if Sasuke would start the lesson without him or not. Despite Naruto's trust and optimism, he always wanted to plan for the worst. The battle had taught him that important concept, and Shikamaru had talked about the idea in the hospital.

As Naruto smiled, he was led to a smaller house in the compound, where a girl just a little bit younger than him sat on the tatami mat below. She had big eyes and long hair, and Naruto, who had seen Sasuke's parents once or twice, figured she must be from his mother's side, as they looked a bit alike.

"Sasuke-nii, when can we start?" Sasuke pointed at a spot on the mat for Naruto to sit, which he did.

"We can start right now. Shuko, this is Uzumaki Naruto, a friend of mine. Naruto, meet Shuko Uchiha, my younger cousin, and your classmate for today." Sasuke no doubt felt some level of amusement at being the teacher of his friend, but also felt safe enough – Naruto was brash, but he was excessively kind when serious.

"Why do we have to train with someone else, Sasuke-nii?" Sasuke smirked.

"Because I said so. Now, let's begin!"

On the other side of town, Shikamaru, Shino, Kiba, and Choji executed the plans the former two had worked on with Sasuke the night before. Using excavation equipment and a manual for creating and expanding tunnels, the four expanded their hideout from a simple room in a mountain considerably, creating a proper doorway with another room. Choji promised to learn an excavation jutsu or two once they learned how to cast jutsu properly in the academy. The secondary room wasn't huge, but it was large enough to hold a couch, fireplace, a few smaller chairs, and a hammock or two.

 ** _Months later_** _…_

Naruto, for the first time, was happy on one of his birthdays. Normally his birthday, October 10, would be filled with people mourning those who died in the Kyuubi attack, and attending festivals and parties later in the night. Towards Naruto, Konoha citizens held an irrational level of fury on that day, and that day alone. Naruto had no idea why this was the case, but had learned from the past to stay indoors on the 10th.

When Choji found out Naruto's birthdate in August, and learned from the boy that he mostly spent it indoors and alone, he knew that wouldn't fly. Assembling Naruto's friends, the Sandaime Hokage, and the owners of several restaurants Naruto was welcomed in, the young Akimichi started the plan for his friend's birthday party.

The first stage was getting Naruto out of the house. Shikamaru invited Naruto to play Shogi and chess while having some tea at his house. Naruto, perplexed, accepted. Shikamaru explained that he wanted to see how Naruto's strategies worked out on the battlefield, especially considering the young Uzumaki's desire to become Hokage.

For the second stage, the rest of Naruto's friends, along with the Sandaime Hokage, Shisui, and Shuko Uchiha, got and set up the necessary supplies for a seven-year-old's birthday party – streamers, presents, wrapping paper, colorful paper, a banner that read "Happy Birthday Naruto!", and an Orange cake with the Hokage's hat drawn in the icing. During this stage, Yakumo Kurama showed up, curious what they were doing. When Choji answered, Yakumo smiled and asked if she could help. There was no opposition – Yakumo was a kind classmate, and wanted to become a strong kunoichi. Couple that with the fact that she had no interest in Sasuke whatsoever, the members of Naruto's group were happy to welcome her to the setup group.

The third stage was fairly simple. Once everything was set up, they went and picked up the pre-ordered barbecue from Yakiniku Q, and the Ichiraku family came over with their own vats of various ramen for the young Uzumaki.

As Shikamaru and Naruto returned, Naruto felt apprehension when entering his apartment – why were the lights off? Why was it that no windows were open? Suddenly, the lights came on, as everyone said "Happy Birthday, Naruto!"

Naruto was shocked beyond belief, but was happy nonetheless. His friends, Shisui-sensei, Shuko, the Ichiraku family, his Jiji, and even Yakumo showed up for some reason!

Naruto received various gifts – a frog wallet from an unknown source, various games, training Shuriken and Kunai, and even a jutsu scroll for the Gentoshin no jutsu**, from all of his friends. With presents opened, everyone got to have some of the barbecue, with a bowl of ramen. The Ichiraku family brought numerous kinds of ramen, such as Mushroom, Vegetable, Chicken, Pork, Shrimp, Beef, Salt, Fish, and even Combination Ramen, which contained just a little bit of everything. After eating their fill of the delicious noodle dish and well-cooked barbecue meat, people started to disband for the night. Shuko was tired after eating, and as such, Shisui had to leave as well to walk her home. Sasuke joined them. Shino left next, stating that he needed time to work on expanding his hive. A few minutes later, the Hokage and Ichiraku family left, citing a need to return to the rest of the village, and join in the festivities, or be back in the Hokage office.

Thus, Naruto, Yakumo, Shikamaru, Choji, and Kiba were the only ones left, and settled with simply talking. Naruto learned a lot of basic information about Yakumo – she enjoys painting, comes from a clan that focuses on genjutsu, and wants to become a shinobi, especially because she's physically weaker than most other ninja, and wants to prove to the world that she can do anything. After talking with the group, Yakumo had a question to ask;

"So, guys..." Everyone looked towards her. "I assume you guys were responsible for whatever you did to Ami's house?" The worry mounting in the boys dispelled as they saw her smile – she was happy with their prank.

Kiba spoke up, talking all about how they had shinobi microphones and such. Impressed, Yakumo asked who the fifth member of their group was. When she heard it was Sasuke, she threw her head back and laughed.

"I bet he was happy to see that shrine in Ami's room." Said Yakumo, with a mirthful glitter in her eye. After a second to pause, everyone laughed some more, at which point Yakumo stood up.

"Choji-san, thank you for allowing me to help, and Naruto-san, thank you for allowing me to attend your party. Happy birthday!" With that, the Kurama heiress left, leaving Kiba, Shikamaru, Choji, and Naruto. After another hour of laughing, playing card games, and talking about the eventual plan to get Naruto as Hokage, the boy left. Naruto, eyeing the leftover Ramen that Teuchi and Ayame had left with him, decided to get another few helpings. At least, he would keep eating until he could fit the leftovers in his fridge.

Several days later, Sasuke had to stay after at the academy, and as such, was delayed to get to Shuko's and his meeting place with Naruto. As the two boys walked through the Uchiha district, they noticed that no lights were on, and the district was deadly quiet. In addition, Naruto caught a strange, metallic smell he didn't like. The two, deeply unnerved, moved to Shuko's location, where they found her curled in a ball.

"Shuko! What's going on?" The little girl grabbed onto her cousin and held him for a few seconds, trying to compose herself.

"Someone's been killing our clan mates! I can hear the sounds of fighting outside and I'm scared, Sasuke-nii.." Naruto and Sasuke exchanged a glance, and one look at the elder Uchiha knew he was going to see who he could find or save.

"I'm going."

"Sasuke, wait! You could be in danger too! I'm not going to sit here and wait for this person to kill me and Shuko too!" Naruto sighed, and gripped Sasuke's shoulder to give him a request or three.

"I'll look after Shuko, Sasuke. Find your family. But whatever you do, come back alive. You hear me?" Sasuke nodded his thanks and ran out, into the night.

As a little eternity passed by in that shed, as Naruto, constantly on edge due to the situation, and possible status of his friend, felt a strange calmness, as if he knew that nothing would happen to him. He stayed there, with the crying Shuko holding onto her fellow student, Naruto had a chance to reflect on what he had seen in the Uchiha clan.

They were proud, yes. They were haughty, yes. But they were also kind people. Naruto remembered an old lady who gave him and Sasuke candy, he thought about Sasuke's parents, kind Mikoto and tough Fugaku. He thought about Shisui, the kind, funny person somewhere between friend and teacher. Naruto wondered if Shisui's relationship with him was a little bit like Sasuke and Itachi had. When Naruto thought about Shisui and Itachi, the dynamic duo of the Uchiha youth, he wondered if they were part of the Anbu squad. He wondered if Itachi was Itachi the ANBU, if Shisui was Karasu the big ol baka.

Naruto's eyes flickered to Shuko, who had been shaking and crying, and Naruto couldn't blame her. As he had grown to know her over the past few months working with Sasuke, he had come to the conclusion that the young Uchiha female wanted to appear proud in that classic Uchiha way, but Naruto knew she was much less secure about herself due to some unknown reason – maybe family, maybe the fact that she had to be tutored in basic chakra exercises by her cousin, maybe, Naruto mused, it was because she was at the same level as the clanless orphan who joined these sessions. After a small eternity (Read: an hour), Shuko's crying subsided into sniffles. A few minutes after, Inu and Neko came in, with branch man following right after.

"Inu, Neko, Branchy!" Said Naruto, as Shuko looked up, eyes puffy from tears. The three ANBU brought the girl to the hospital, and Naruto was shocked to see that her roommate in the hospital was none other than Sasuke, who was asleep. Standing over the bed of the unconscious Uchiha was the Sandaime Hokage, who gave Naruto a hug as he walked up.

"What happened, Jiji?" Naruto murmured, as he looked at Sasuke and Shuko.

"Naruto, do you know Itachi Uchiha?" Naruto nodded, not saying anything.

"He killed everyone in that compound. Everyone but these two." Naruto's eyes silently widened.

"So… that means Ms. Mikoto and Mr. Fugaku…" Naruto trailed off.

"They aren't with us anymore."

"What about the old lady, Sasuke's aunt?"

"Gone as well, Naruto."

"Shisui-sensei? Please tell me he's…" Naruto couldn't finish the sentence, but knew the answer as the Sandaime put his hand on Naruto's head, and as Naruto grabbed the Sandaime's hand with both of his, he felt the scars and lines from years of shinobi work and Hokage duties.

At that moment, emotions overwhelmed Naruto as he felt tears well up.

"Sasuke's brother… Itachi did this?" The Sandaime puffed a tiny bit of smoke out of his pipe.

"Yes." He replied, quiet but serious as the grave. Naruto didn't ask why – he was overwhelmed. His sensei was dead. So many people had he seen in that compound, even if he hadn't bothered to talk to them, he recognized their faces over time, recognized the names of their shops and the looks of their homes.

All of them were gone, and the only vestiges of the once proud clan were the unconscious boy, sniffling girl, and their murderer, their demon.

"Where is he now?"

"Itachi?"

"Yeah. Is he still in the village, Jiji? Did Inu and Neko and Branchy catch him?" Sarutobi paused.

"He escaped. He's gone, and hopefully he never returns."

Naruto collected himself, and wrote a little note to Sasuke and Shuko, asking them to come to his apartment when they were released from the hospital. Thanking the Sandaime, he left the hospital room.

As Naruto started his walk home, Sarutobi stood there, looking at the evidence of his humanity, his mistakes. Two children who would never be the same again. Never.

Naruto arrived back at his apartment, went up the fire ladder, and sat down on his bed. He thought about how quickly he had gone from having the best day of his life to the definite worst. He couldn't (and didn't) even want to imagine the state of his friends in the hospital. That being said, Naruto had lived alone for some time now, and knew what it felt like. Naruto felt guilt that he was alright while Shuko and Sasuke would suffer immensely. His guilt was at least ten times greater than the Ichirakus paying his hospital bill, and yet he wasn't even responsible for the massacre in the Uchiha compound!

He wouldn't simply be on the sidelines while his friends suffered. And as Naruto's consciousness faded into sleep, the fire of determination that had been awakened in his soul only grew stronger, as the Kyuubi stirred. It didn't know what had happened on the outside world, but it felt the awakening. Kurama felt the change, not knowing that it would cause great changes in the world.

Perhaps this Jinchuriki would be more interesting than his last.

 ***1 Ryo = 10 Yen, 2,000,000 Yen = roughly 18146 USD. 3,000,000 Yen = roughly 27213 USD**

 ****This is the jutsu used by the Akatsuki to communicate in meetings – the whole rainbow hologram technique.**

 **I'll see you all in the next chapter. I understand that Han came in and vanished seemingly out of nowhere, and that analysis is pretty damn correct, and he will not be forgotten. That being said, I also am aware of the continuity error several chapters back, and plan to double check my work more clearly next time.**

 **Additionally, Shuko didn't originally fit into my storyboard for this fic, but I decided to mess with a pairing, and tamper with who I wanted to end up where later in life. This prompted a need for Shuko. Additionally, please expect Yakumo to remain on the sidelines, but she will become more important, I promise :).**

 **Have a good day, and thanks for the continued support,**

 **~KoS.**


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